(no subject)
i don't want to be here. i can't stand this pathetic patch of land we call home. 21 years in this hell, and what do i have to show for it? $12,000 in debt, still in school, working a job that's beginning to get on my last nerve. why can't things go back to the way they used to be? back when we didn't have a care in the world. a time before tuition and car payments, cell phone bills and 100 miles of driving every day? i can't wait to get out of here. this town can do nothing for me. i don't know where i'll go, but i just know that it needs to be somewhere far from here...............maybe........eventually..........never. you can't get away. something will always bring you back.
i don't know how much longer i can put up with this. i can't work 40 weeks and go to school full time. but if i don't do that i won't be able to pay bills and that fun shit. that's about to change. here's the plan:
1) i hardly talk on my cell phone unless it's the weekend or after work, so therefore i'm changing my plan to have less minutes, therefore less expensive.
2)income taxes: as soon as i get my forms from UC, i'm going down to file my taxes. when i get the money back, i'm paying off my tuition and credit card, and whatever's left from that will go toward paying off my jeep. i need to get the expensive stuff taken care of so that over the summer i won't have to pay as much in bills and can save for whatever i need (most likely tuition since the government likes to fuck me over).
3)once i get that shit paid off, i'm only working 30 hours a week. that'll give me more time to devote to school, and will also allow me to not have to deal with the fucking retarded supervisor on second shift as much. seriously, since he's taken over for me nearly two months ago, he's taken absolutely no initiative and has no idea what the fuck he's doing. basically, i might as well be supervisor. he can't do it. he has no idea what's going on, he doesn't know how to fix shit. when something breaks, he comes and gets me. i've shown him at least 30 times how to do something, he's written it down, and he STILL doesn't know how to fucking do it. i'm ten seconds away from talking to my boss, but i know he won't listen because he chose Al to take over for me, and he won't admit that he made a bad decision. if it sounds like i want the job back, i don't. i'd be very content with going in and running my machine every day, just like the other guys, but no, i'm Al's little bitch because he doesn't know how to do anything. i wish things were like they were back before i was supervisor. then i just came in, did what i had to do, and left. that's what i'm going to do from now on though. i'm going in, running my machine, and not talking to anybody. it'll make for long days, but i don't give a fuck anymore.
one more work related note, once summer comes rolling around, i'm going to see if i can work first shift (5:30am-2pm) because this second shift shit has got to go.
i don't know what's wrong with me, but right now i'm feeling very pissed off, and for really no reason. i also feel like i need to just go out and drive around to clear my head, but leaving would wake my dad up and besides, i have to get up early so i can go down to school and work on homework. well, i'm going to try to find something to do til i feel tired, since i'm wide awake and pissed at the world right now.
i don't know how much longer i can put up with this. i can't work 40 weeks and go to school full time. but if i don't do that i won't be able to pay bills and that fun shit. that's about to change. here's the plan:
1) i hardly talk on my cell phone unless it's the weekend or after work, so therefore i'm changing my plan to have less minutes, therefore less expensive.
2)income taxes: as soon as i get my forms from UC, i'm going down to file my taxes. when i get the money back, i'm paying off my tuition and credit card, and whatever's left from that will go toward paying off my jeep. i need to get the expensive stuff taken care of so that over the summer i won't have to pay as much in bills and can save for whatever i need (most likely tuition since the government likes to fuck me over).
3)once i get that shit paid off, i'm only working 30 hours a week. that'll give me more time to devote to school, and will also allow me to not have to deal with the fucking retarded supervisor on second shift as much. seriously, since he's taken over for me nearly two months ago, he's taken absolutely no initiative and has no idea what the fuck he's doing. basically, i might as well be supervisor. he can't do it. he has no idea what's going on, he doesn't know how to fix shit. when something breaks, he comes and gets me. i've shown him at least 30 times how to do something, he's written it down, and he STILL doesn't know how to fucking do it. i'm ten seconds away from talking to my boss, but i know he won't listen because he chose Al to take over for me, and he won't admit that he made a bad decision. if it sounds like i want the job back, i don't. i'd be very content with going in and running my machine every day, just like the other guys, but no, i'm Al's little bitch because he doesn't know how to do anything. i wish things were like they were back before i was supervisor. then i just came in, did what i had to do, and left. that's what i'm going to do from now on though. i'm going in, running my machine, and not talking to anybody. it'll make for long days, but i don't give a fuck anymore.
one more work related note, once summer comes rolling around, i'm going to see if i can work first shift (5:30am-2pm) because this second shift shit has got to go.
i don't know what's wrong with me, but right now i'm feeling very pissed off, and for really no reason. i also feel like i need to just go out and drive around to clear my head, but leaving would wake my dad up and besides, i have to get up early so i can go down to school and work on homework. well, i'm going to try to find something to do til i feel tired, since i'm wide awake and pissed at the world right now.