Grindhouse Review
Went to see it this evening with tori_vixen, Tori's guy , mullein and lexpendragon. I've been so worked up with shock, fright and nerve wracking scenes that I can barely type. Planet Terror had so much gore that I felt sick to my stomach... that's a lot coming from someone who's shadowed in a vet clinic and watched surgery. Death Proof on the other hand was filled with so many car wrecks it leaves you jittery for quite awhile.... half hour later and I'm still full of jitters.
Ready to hear more? Spoilers behind the cuts of course...
The Fake Trailers
There were a few fake trailers. Damn! I want them to make Machete, Werewolf Women of the SS, Thanksgiving and Don't Scream seems hilarious. I can't believe in the Werewolf women they had Nicolas Cage as Fu Manchu. The whole theater erupted into laughter for that one. Who else but Rob Zombie is listed as the director. LOL. The Thanksgiving Day slasher is so funny and nothing as creepy as the people bound up on the table like turkeys. Machete especially seemed awesome. It was like the mix of Charles Bronson in Death Wish and who the hell knows what but totally awesome. The Evil Knievel stunts on a motorcycle with a Gatling gun strapped to the front, total cult cheese and so awesome.
I adore the use of fake trailers though... I want to see some of these films made. It would be nice if they did. Wonder if they would or will?
Planet Terror
ZOMBIES! Boiling, nasty, boil popping, slimy, gross Zombies from ...well not Hell, military toxin. The fact Bruce Willis was an evil, wronged military officer who killed Osama Bin Laden totally rocked though not as much as Cherry Darling and her machine gun peg leg. The theme was very much Resident Evil on cult movie crack. The military had designed a virus that turns people into bubbling puss dripping zombies. The only way to fend off the effects is to stay on the virus/gas like a drug. The effects were totally disgusting. What was the worst you ask? When the one soldier was going to rape Cherry and we get a view of his cock going zombie. The gory, dripping, slime was probably the worst. The blowing up heads, brains getting torn out... nothing compared to that scene.
The infection was passed on through bites like usual zombies but also from having the zombies pop blood filled boils in your face. It makes my stomach queasy just thinking about that part. What zombie movie can exist without an insane doctor? In this movie we get two! The Blocks, whose kid cues us into the zombies right at the beginning when he says... "I want to eat your brains... and gain your knowledge." Oddly enough it seems to be an Alien attacking a G.I. Joe in his play.
Of course, the movie has a savoir... first the biochemist, who gets his head blown off by being an ass, this leaves no hope to develop the antidote. Cherry storming the helipad... absolutely amazing in that cultish way. Our second savior... Wray, Cherry's estranged/refound love but he gets shot saving her. His last line patting her stomach is his catch phrase, "I never miss". Referring to the "lost reel" sex scene. Sure cheesy but in this movie it was a humorous break from the absolute gore. It was needed or the movie would have been too much.
Death Proof
The car was awesome... 1970's charger, the movie had two of them! There was a ton of funny dialogue in this segment, more so even than the first. The plot, Jungle Julia dares her friend Butterfly on the radio to give a lap dance to whoever first repeats a poem to her after buying a drink. Sadly, we don't get to see the lap dance it is a "Lost reel of film" yet again. Good way to save the film from that NC-17 rating. Anyway back to the movie. Stuntman Mike who has the Death Proof charger with the stylized skull and crossbones on the roof is stalking Julia and her friends. The movie suggests he gets off on killing pretty girls in his car. The first victim is just banged to hell in the passenger seat. The line... "This car is 100% death proof, only to get the benefit of it honey, you really need to be sitting in my seat!" is delivered flawlessly and makes the scene perfect.
One girl down he catches up with Julia and her crew, shuts down the lights and smashes them at 200 miles an hour head on. There is about two minutes of footage of the crash from everyone's point of view. It is sickening and at the same time filmed in such a way that the visual shock and intensity somehow makes it impossible to look away. Stuntman Mike is in the hospital, girls dead and we see two sheriffs talking about how sick the crash was and on and on.
Cut later to four more girls, two actresses and two stunt women and Stuntman Mike taking pictures of them. We all know what's coming... that's right stuntman vs stuntwomen. This is where my nerves got fried. The girls take the matching charger (in white) for a test drive only to have the Stuntman attempt to kill them. So starts 20 minutes or so of hair raising stunts with Zoë hanging on the roof for most of it. First he's trying to kill them then Kim shoots him and so the chase reverses. The girls hunt him down and beat him to death. Here ends the movie with a freeze frame. Oh, I forgot to mention the outrageously silly, over the top girly, girl screams coming from Stuntman Mike when he finally crashes. Again though I think this was needed to make you laugh and break the intensity in the movie.
I love car stunts and this segment was loaded with them.
Which segment did I like more?... it's a toss up. How can one choose between a stripper with a machine gun leg and intense car crashes? You can't. Good thing they showed them together. The almost three hours was well worth every moment, and cent I paid. I really don't think this movie will be as good on the TV. With all the fake trailers and silly movie stuff in it the transition to home TV isn't going to be so good. Also the gore and crashes on the big screen and surround sound has to be. I definitely suggest making a trip to the theaters to see this one if only to appreciate the extras and the parody.
I will say both movies, despite the culty weirdness, used suspense and visuals such as angle and effects to the full potential. The impact of the scenes was amazing in the sense of gross out and jumping. I've seen reviews where they comment on all the dumb dialogue but I think without those breaks in the movie people might vomit or pass out. I know I felt that heaving feeling a few times. It might be a cult movie, filled with unnecessary gore and the dialogue might be silly 90% of the time but the use of cinematic techniques to keep you on edge is at its height. The skill is there in ways most won't appreciate but I found the movie to have an artistic talent that is being lost in modern movies. I really miss jumping in the theater from fright or suspense.
Ready to hear more? Spoilers behind the cuts of course...
The Fake Trailers
There were a few fake trailers. Damn! I want them to make Machete, Werewolf Women of the SS, Thanksgiving and Don't Scream seems hilarious. I can't believe in the Werewolf women they had Nicolas Cage as Fu Manchu. The whole theater erupted into laughter for that one. Who else but Rob Zombie is listed as the director. LOL. The Thanksgiving Day slasher is so funny and nothing as creepy as the people bound up on the table like turkeys. Machete especially seemed awesome. It was like the mix of Charles Bronson in Death Wish and who the hell knows what but totally awesome. The Evil Knievel stunts on a motorcycle with a Gatling gun strapped to the front, total cult cheese and so awesome.
I adore the use of fake trailers though... I want to see some of these films made. It would be nice if they did. Wonder if they would or will?
Planet Terror
ZOMBIES! Boiling, nasty, boil popping, slimy, gross Zombies from ...well not Hell, military toxin. The fact Bruce Willis was an evil, wronged military officer who killed Osama Bin Laden totally rocked though not as much as Cherry Darling and her machine gun peg leg. The theme was very much Resident Evil on cult movie crack. The military had designed a virus that turns people into bubbling puss dripping zombies. The only way to fend off the effects is to stay on the virus/gas like a drug. The effects were totally disgusting. What was the worst you ask? When the one soldier was going to rape Cherry and we get a view of his cock going zombie. The gory, dripping, slime was probably the worst. The blowing up heads, brains getting torn out... nothing compared to that scene.
The infection was passed on through bites like usual zombies but also from having the zombies pop blood filled boils in your face. It makes my stomach queasy just thinking about that part. What zombie movie can exist without an insane doctor? In this movie we get two! The Blocks, whose kid cues us into the zombies right at the beginning when he says... "I want to eat your brains... and gain your knowledge." Oddly enough it seems to be an Alien attacking a G.I. Joe in his play.
Of course, the movie has a savoir... first the biochemist, who gets his head blown off by being an ass, this leaves no hope to develop the antidote. Cherry storming the helipad... absolutely amazing in that cultish way. Our second savior... Wray, Cherry's estranged/refound love but he gets shot saving her. His last line patting her stomach is his catch phrase, "I never miss". Referring to the "lost reel" sex scene. Sure cheesy but in this movie it was a humorous break from the absolute gore. It was needed or the movie would have been too much.
Death Proof
The car was awesome... 1970's charger, the movie had two of them! There was a ton of funny dialogue in this segment, more so even than the first. The plot, Jungle Julia dares her friend Butterfly on the radio to give a lap dance to whoever first repeats a poem to her after buying a drink. Sadly, we don't get to see the lap dance it is a "Lost reel of film" yet again. Good way to save the film from that NC-17 rating. Anyway back to the movie. Stuntman Mike who has the Death Proof charger with the stylized skull and crossbones on the roof is stalking Julia and her friends. The movie suggests he gets off on killing pretty girls in his car. The first victim is just banged to hell in the passenger seat. The line... "This car is 100% death proof, only to get the benefit of it honey, you really need to be sitting in my seat!" is delivered flawlessly and makes the scene perfect.
One girl down he catches up with Julia and her crew, shuts down the lights and smashes them at 200 miles an hour head on. There is about two minutes of footage of the crash from everyone's point of view. It is sickening and at the same time filmed in such a way that the visual shock and intensity somehow makes it impossible to look away. Stuntman Mike is in the hospital, girls dead and we see two sheriffs talking about how sick the crash was and on and on.
Cut later to four more girls, two actresses and two stunt women and Stuntman Mike taking pictures of them. We all know what's coming... that's right stuntman vs stuntwomen. This is where my nerves got fried. The girls take the matching charger (in white) for a test drive only to have the Stuntman attempt to kill them. So starts 20 minutes or so of hair raising stunts with Zoë hanging on the roof for most of it. First he's trying to kill them then Kim shoots him and so the chase reverses. The girls hunt him down and beat him to death. Here ends the movie with a freeze frame. Oh, I forgot to mention the outrageously silly, over the top girly, girl screams coming from Stuntman Mike when he finally crashes. Again though I think this was needed to make you laugh and break the intensity in the movie.
I love car stunts and this segment was loaded with them.
Which segment did I like more?... it's a toss up. How can one choose between a stripper with a machine gun leg and intense car crashes? You can't. Good thing they showed them together. The almost three hours was well worth every moment, and cent I paid. I really don't think this movie will be as good on the TV. With all the fake trailers and silly movie stuff in it the transition to home TV isn't going to be so good. Also the gore and crashes on the big screen and surround sound has to be. I definitely suggest making a trip to the theaters to see this one if only to appreciate the extras and the parody.
I will say both movies, despite the culty weirdness, used suspense and visuals such as angle and effects to the full potential. The impact of the scenes was amazing in the sense of gross out and jumping. I've seen reviews where they comment on all the dumb dialogue but I think without those breaks in the movie people might vomit or pass out. I know I felt that heaving feeling a few times. It might be a cult movie, filled with unnecessary gore and the dialogue might be silly 90% of the time but the use of cinematic techniques to keep you on edge is at its height. The skill is there in ways most won't appreciate but I found the movie to have an artistic talent that is being lost in modern movies. I really miss jumping in the theater from fright or suspense.