Sep 17, 2011 18:23
epic fail,
show don't tell,
badfic:hogwarts exposed,
the pansexual '50s,
i now pronounce you a bunch of idiots,
wrong word dammit,
department of redundancy department,
thirty contrivance pileup,
anvil of foreshadowing,
read pou instead,
pov!fail,
the anvil symbolises heavy-handedness,
sexism,
welsh railway,
priorities be damned,
you call that pacing,
facepalming in frustration,
nudity for everyone,
hermione in name only,
harry potter,
continuity isn't optional
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You know, it's very hard for Neil to argue that this all isn't supposed to be sexual when the first thing Hermione asks her parents isn't "How have you been?" or "Have I made you proud?" but "So, you can see me running around naked?"
And no Neil, having Hermione's saint-like, dead parents extoll the virtues of nudism isn't going to endear it to us anymore.
"The scum took her virginity and left her pregnant."
Love the sexism there, or else Neil just doesn't know how people describe one-night stands like that. I could see Ginny saying "He lead her on" or "he took advantage of her naivety" or even just "He got her pregnant and abandoned her" (which would be sufficient to establish someone as a jerk, yes). Instead, him stealing her virginity (which sounds like something a villain from a 1950s movie would do for maximum evil) is treated as the worst thing. -_-
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It really is a poor fit with the generally sex-positive tone of most adult-rated fanfics.
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