uhhh
Am I oversensitive today or what?
someone just posted this poem:
Kryptonite by Ron Koertge
Lois liked to see the bullets bounce
off Superman's chest, and of course
she was proud when he leaned into
a locomotive and saved the crippled
orphan who had fallen on the tracks.
Yet on those long nights when he was
readjusting longitude or destroying
a meteor headed right for some nun,
Lois considered carrying just a smidgen
of kryptonite in her purse or at least
making a tincture to dab behind her ears.
She pictured his knees giving way,
the color draining from his cheeks.
He'd lie on the couch like a guy with
the flu, too weak to paint the front
porch or take out the garbage. She
could peek down his tights or draw
on his cheek with a ballpoint. She
might even muss his hair and slap
him around.
"Hey, what'd I do?" he'd croak just
like a regular boyfriend. At last.
What the hell? I'm a Ron Koertge fan, I admit it. I've seen him read and he's hilarious. He's from Collinsville, IL, and he grew up in Granite City, IL, my hometown, yo. But this poem is just not funny. If this is really how straight girls think (and I sincerely hope not!) thank GOD I don't date straight girls! It does, however, explain the sundry neuroses found in all my straight boy friends. I have a mysogynist streak in me, I'm the first to admit it. I've made many a "straight girls are insane" comment, I've been known to offer girl advice to my boys with the disclaimer, "BUT I'm speaking from the standpoint of a rational human being. This advice may not work with a straight girl." And not to be discriminatory, there are a butt load of insane lesbians out there, too. But I gotta say, I was mostly kidding. Can anyone defend this piece of incendiary nonsense? Are women this damaged by control and manipulation, or is it the proliferation of this idea spread by men who have inherent issues with women more to blame?
someone just posted this poem:
Kryptonite by Ron Koertge
Lois liked to see the bullets bounce
off Superman's chest, and of course
she was proud when he leaned into
a locomotive and saved the crippled
orphan who had fallen on the tracks.
Yet on those long nights when he was
readjusting longitude or destroying
a meteor headed right for some nun,
Lois considered carrying just a smidgen
of kryptonite in her purse or at least
making a tincture to dab behind her ears.
She pictured his knees giving way,
the color draining from his cheeks.
He'd lie on the couch like a guy with
the flu, too weak to paint the front
porch or take out the garbage. She
could peek down his tights or draw
on his cheek with a ballpoint. She
might even muss his hair and slap
him around.
"Hey, what'd I do?" he'd croak just
like a regular boyfriend. At last.
What the hell? I'm a Ron Koertge fan, I admit it. I've seen him read and he's hilarious. He's from Collinsville, IL, and he grew up in Granite City, IL, my hometown, yo. But this poem is just not funny. If this is really how straight girls think (and I sincerely hope not!) thank GOD I don't date straight girls! It does, however, explain the sundry neuroses found in all my straight boy friends. I have a mysogynist streak in me, I'm the first to admit it. I've made many a "straight girls are insane" comment, I've been known to offer girl advice to my boys with the disclaimer, "BUT I'm speaking from the standpoint of a rational human being. This advice may not work with a straight girl." And not to be discriminatory, there are a butt load of insane lesbians out there, too. But I gotta say, I was mostly kidding. Can anyone defend this piece of incendiary nonsense? Are women this damaged by control and manipulation, or is it the proliferation of this idea spread by men who have inherent issues with women more to blame?