bogged down by history
"I totally just post-rocked this music box."
"Do it again."
(Instead of running through When You Wish Upon A Star at normal pace, the time between notes, even on the same line, is ridiculously spaced out, giving the illusion of epic sadness.)
"No you didn't."
"Yes I did."
"All you did was slow it down, because you're brain doesn't work that fast and you have horrible retention to you it sounds like two entirely different things."
"The spacing of the notes and the alternating of the melody gives it an epic sadness."
"Found where? In Sigur Ros?"
"Uh, yeah?"
"That's post-rock? It's all overlong orchestral sweeps that sound like someone is breaking sticks on a whale's backbone in order to make it cry, where's the rock?"
"It's POST-rock!"
"How convenient."
"Well, it's not rock, and it goes on like forever, really really slow, it's like accepting you're about to cry and then crying. If it's not post-rock then what is it?"
"That's a false dilemma."
"I'm not placing you under stress for any unfounded reasons."
"No, but you're giving only two options when it's multi-faceted. Didn't you take debate?"
"We just sat around and talked."
"Shame."
"Well, it could also be like Explosions before it sounds like they've jumped off a ship into the middle of naval warfare."
"Yeah, but instead it sounds like Roundabout from Yes before they jump off the factory line into a vat of cheese."
"No, wait, scrape your feet in the snow, it'll sound like tv, the channel with the static."
"That does not sound like distortion."
"Ugh, I'm never sharing anything with you again! "