Untouchable - Pt 2
KinkMeme Fill #2: Starscream/?
Sorry for the delay, folks. And equally sorry that this chapter's a bit slow...
Warnings, etc. are found in Chapter 1.
-----
Chapter 2:
“Yo.”
Skywarp blearily looked up from where he’d been resting his head on his forearms. “Nn?”
“Rough day?”
The black seeker smiled, lip-components pressed together and stretched in a long, up-curved line. “Naw. S’… S’a good day.”
“I see you’ve been hitting the high grade.”
“Mmmm~…”
“You know it’s only just after midday, don’t you?”
“Ssss… sssooo?”
“You know? You’re quite right. It’s never a bad time of day to get roaring drunk.”
A faint frown marred the jet’s otherwise happy stupor. “M’not… M’not roarin’. M’quiet as a… a glitch-mouse. An’ m’not drunk. M’just… M’just buzz… buzzzzzed.” The end of his sentence drifted off into a light giggle. “Buzzzz, bizzzz, bazzuzzz… I… I like that word - makes my glossa feel tingly.”
“Yeah, I like that word, too.”
“Mmm.” Skywarp went back to smiling happily, then thunked his head onto the table-top.
“Hey.”
“Mm?” He didn’t bother looking up this time.
“Did Starscream give you the go-ahead to get into the high grade?”
Faintly, the mech nodded, still smiling. “He’s… he’s a good friend.”
“Oh, the best of friends.”
“Mmm.”
“Do you think he’d let me have some?”
“Uh. I… I’unno.” Skywarp shrugged.
“Since Megatron’s still unconscious, and since Starscream’s such a good friend, I thought now might be a good time to ask him.”
“Well, uh… I’unno. I… I’unno.” He made trying to think look like that most troublesome of burdens. “He might?”
“I guess I’ll just have to ask him.”
“Yeah. You… go do that. I’m gon’… gonna stay here.”
“Okay. You enjoy the rest of your day.”
“Mmm~…”
“Oh, one more thing.”
“Mmm?”
“Since he’s so nice… How is it he hasn’t gotten laid?”
“Uuuuh…”
“I mean, it’s not like half the army hasn’t fantasized about tappin’ that.”
Skywarp gained an odd sort of smile. “Pro’ly… pro’ly value their lives too much.”
“Oh, but he’s such a nice guy. He wouldn’t hurt a mech just for wantin’ to interface.”
The odd smile got wider. “Nah, but… But he don’t got much say in the matter.”
“What do you mean?”
“Jus’… jus’ ‘cause he’d… Well, even if ‘e was up to it, wou’n’t make much dif’rence. They’d still end up…” He trailed off, the smile giving way to a confused frown. “Wait, m’not… There was something…”
“Go on.”
“Dun think… was s’posed to say that. Can’ remember…”
“Oh, it’s okay. We’re friends, right? Friends don’t have to worry about secrets.”
Skywarp looked up and finally seemed to gain some recognition of just who he was talking to. “N-… No. We’re not… friends. You’re...” His gaze wobbled in and out of focus. “You’re creepy.” He giggled again, then passed right out, helm smacking back onto his arm.
Ex-venting heavily, the grey mech crossed his arms. “Well, that’s a start, at least.” Fluttering his rotors behind him, Vortex went off in search of his next informant.
-----
“So, never?”
“That is the definition of a virgin, Astrotrain.”
“Well, yeah, but… I mean, you’re so… so…”
“So, what?” Starscream calmly set down the tools he’d been tinkering with and gave the triplechanger an arch look.
“Well, you come off as having been, ya know, around a lot.” Astrotrain shuffled uncomfortably where he sat.
“You mean that I appear to be a slut.”
He winced. “Well, it sounds so bad when you say it like that.”
The Air Commander heaved a dramatic sigh and rolled his optics. “If you would like to apply a term to it, it’s called being a ‘fake rake’ - I am an unscrupulous little piece of shareware in rumor only.” He smirked. “Also, being an intelligent and observant sort, I have managed to not only make use of those falsehoods to further my own needs, but to also keep up appearances by, how shall I put it?, ‘talking the talk’.”
“So you’ve really, really never…”
“You saw it for yourself, didn’t you?”
“Well, yeah, but… Well, you’ve never even tried anything else? What about your… other equipment?”
A slow, decidedly evil smile crept across the Seeker’s face. “As well as having never been spiked, I have never been the one to do the spiking. I did try using my mouth once, but…”
Astrotrain shifted forwards onto the edge of his seat, attention captivated. “…But?”
“Well, as soon as he got his codpiece off, he started having a fit. Turned out that the energon he’d had just prior to us getting started had been tainted, and he had a bad reaction; he went into convulsions, oral fluids and processed energon foaming up out of his mouth. Come to think of it, I’m pretty sure he died.” He sounded only vaguely wistful about this, one finger thoughtfully pressed to his bottom lip. Astrotrain gave his superior a stricken look, and Starscream smirked.
Shaking himself briefly, the purple and grey mech smoothed his features back into place. “So… what, did that put you off the whole thing? I have trouble believing that one dead mech would make you shun the experience.”
“Oh, it wasn’t just one.”
“…What?” Astrotrain’s tone went flat - quite the accomplishment, considering the harmonious quality of his voice.
“If I’m not forgetting anyone, I think that it has been… fourteen deaths, and two non-fatal maimings.” He paused. “Wait, it’s three now, as of two days ago.”
“You mean… Megatron?”
“Mhmm!” He was so very cheerful as he said this.
“So, every mech you’ve ever tried to get with has…”
“Yup!”
“And you were perfectly aware of this when you and Megatron…”
Starscream’s grin nearly split his face in two.
It took a few moments, but Astrotrain finally broke out into laughter, slapping his thigh in his humor. “That… that is the most ridiculous assassination attempt you’ve tried yet!”
“Hey, it nearly worked, didn’t it?” The fact that his leader was still alive seemed only a minor inconvenience to his good mood.
“Oh, Primus…” Astrotrain just shook his head in amusement, chest still shaking with suppressed laughter. “Hey, wait…” He tilted his head, gazing into the middle distance. “Have you thought about why everybody you get with dies? I mean… You gotta admit, that’s some pretty messed up slag right there. I mean… are you doing…?”
“No, it’s not me.” Starscream put one pede against his work table and tipped his chair backwards. “At least, not directly - I haven’t actually figured out what it is, yet, which is something of a bother to my pride as a scientist. I’ve tried just about everything I can to achieve an alternate outcome, and had no success… Although, I would dearly like to know what causes the difference between the fatal and non-fatal… I’ve been thinking about it since the Constructicons managed to save our Glorious Leader from bleeding out. I had assumed that the other two were merely flukes, and I suppose that they still might have been…”
“Huh.”
“Indeed.”
“What about kissing?”
Starscream blinked and gave the other mech a calculating look. “Well… I have tried kissing a few times, but it was never intended to stay a make-out session. We always moved onto further things, and then… Well, I’ve already told you the outcomes.”
Astrotrain was smiling.
“You don’t seriously want to try it - not after everything I’ve just told you.”
“Maybe I’m a little intrigued…”
“Intrigued is one thing. Suicidally over-confidant is another.”
“You’re one to talk. And come on… Just a quick smooch and we’ll call it quits. No hands or anything.”
“No.”
“Please?”
“Absolutely not.”
“Even if I promise no glossa?”
“Astrotrain, if you persist in this manner of argument, I shall be forced to do something unpleasant.”
Against his better judgment, he asked. “Like what?”
“Like offer you a blowjob.”
The triplechanger made a half-choked sound that was almost a laugh, even as he cringed. “Ya know, I never would have thought of something like that as a threat before now…”
Smirking, Starscream turned back towards his work table.
-----
Dedicated to Peppymint1986, for being generally awesome. And for giving me a dozen WONDERFUl ideas for upcoming chapters. Hahaha~
This entry was originally posted at http://syntheticeuphoria.dreamwidth.org/6647.html.
Sorry for the delay, folks. And equally sorry that this chapter's a bit slow...
Warnings, etc. are found in Chapter 1.
-----
Chapter 2:
“Yo.”
Skywarp blearily looked up from where he’d been resting his head on his forearms. “Nn?”
“Rough day?”
The black seeker smiled, lip-components pressed together and stretched in a long, up-curved line. “Naw. S’… S’a good day.”
“I see you’ve been hitting the high grade.”
“Mmmm~…”
“You know it’s only just after midday, don’t you?”
“Ssss… sssooo?”
“You know? You’re quite right. It’s never a bad time of day to get roaring drunk.”
A faint frown marred the jet’s otherwise happy stupor. “M’not… M’not roarin’. M’quiet as a… a glitch-mouse. An’ m’not drunk. M’just… M’just buzz… buzzzzzed.” The end of his sentence drifted off into a light giggle. “Buzzzz, bizzzz, bazzuzzz… I… I like that word - makes my glossa feel tingly.”
“Yeah, I like that word, too.”
“Mmm.” Skywarp went back to smiling happily, then thunked his head onto the table-top.
“Hey.”
“Mm?” He didn’t bother looking up this time.
“Did Starscream give you the go-ahead to get into the high grade?”
Faintly, the mech nodded, still smiling. “He’s… he’s a good friend.”
“Oh, the best of friends.”
“Mmm.”
“Do you think he’d let me have some?”
“Uh. I… I’unno.” Skywarp shrugged.
“Since Megatron’s still unconscious, and since Starscream’s such a good friend, I thought now might be a good time to ask him.”
“Well, uh… I’unno. I… I’unno.” He made trying to think look like that most troublesome of burdens. “He might?”
“I guess I’ll just have to ask him.”
“Yeah. You… go do that. I’m gon’… gonna stay here.”
“Okay. You enjoy the rest of your day.”
“Mmm~…”
“Oh, one more thing.”
“Mmm?”
“Since he’s so nice… How is it he hasn’t gotten laid?”
“Uuuuh…”
“I mean, it’s not like half the army hasn’t fantasized about tappin’ that.”
Skywarp gained an odd sort of smile. “Pro’ly… pro’ly value their lives too much.”
“Oh, but he’s such a nice guy. He wouldn’t hurt a mech just for wantin’ to interface.”
The odd smile got wider. “Nah, but… But he don’t got much say in the matter.”
“What do you mean?”
“Jus’… jus’ ‘cause he’d… Well, even if ‘e was up to it, wou’n’t make much dif’rence. They’d still end up…” He trailed off, the smile giving way to a confused frown. “Wait, m’not… There was something…”
“Go on.”
“Dun think… was s’posed to say that. Can’ remember…”
“Oh, it’s okay. We’re friends, right? Friends don’t have to worry about secrets.”
Skywarp looked up and finally seemed to gain some recognition of just who he was talking to. “N-… No. We’re not… friends. You’re...” His gaze wobbled in and out of focus. “You’re creepy.” He giggled again, then passed right out, helm smacking back onto his arm.
Ex-venting heavily, the grey mech crossed his arms. “Well, that’s a start, at least.” Fluttering his rotors behind him, Vortex went off in search of his next informant.
-----
“So, never?”
“That is the definition of a virgin, Astrotrain.”
“Well, yeah, but… I mean, you’re so… so…”
“So, what?” Starscream calmly set down the tools he’d been tinkering with and gave the triplechanger an arch look.
“Well, you come off as having been, ya know, around a lot.” Astrotrain shuffled uncomfortably where he sat.
“You mean that I appear to be a slut.”
He winced. “Well, it sounds so bad when you say it like that.”
The Air Commander heaved a dramatic sigh and rolled his optics. “If you would like to apply a term to it, it’s called being a ‘fake rake’ - I am an unscrupulous little piece of shareware in rumor only.” He smirked. “Also, being an intelligent and observant sort, I have managed to not only make use of those falsehoods to further my own needs, but to also keep up appearances by, how shall I put it?, ‘talking the talk’.”
“So you’ve really, really never…”
“You saw it for yourself, didn’t you?”
“Well, yeah, but… Well, you’ve never even tried anything else? What about your… other equipment?”
A slow, decidedly evil smile crept across the Seeker’s face. “As well as having never been spiked, I have never been the one to do the spiking. I did try using my mouth once, but…”
Astrotrain shifted forwards onto the edge of his seat, attention captivated. “…But?”
“Well, as soon as he got his codpiece off, he started having a fit. Turned out that the energon he’d had just prior to us getting started had been tainted, and he had a bad reaction; he went into convulsions, oral fluids and processed energon foaming up out of his mouth. Come to think of it, I’m pretty sure he died.” He sounded only vaguely wistful about this, one finger thoughtfully pressed to his bottom lip. Astrotrain gave his superior a stricken look, and Starscream smirked.
Shaking himself briefly, the purple and grey mech smoothed his features back into place. “So… what, did that put you off the whole thing? I have trouble believing that one dead mech would make you shun the experience.”
“Oh, it wasn’t just one.”
“…What?” Astrotrain’s tone went flat - quite the accomplishment, considering the harmonious quality of his voice.
“If I’m not forgetting anyone, I think that it has been… fourteen deaths, and two non-fatal maimings.” He paused. “Wait, it’s three now, as of two days ago.”
“You mean… Megatron?”
“Mhmm!” He was so very cheerful as he said this.
“So, every mech you’ve ever tried to get with has…”
“Yup!”
“And you were perfectly aware of this when you and Megatron…”
Starscream’s grin nearly split his face in two.
It took a few moments, but Astrotrain finally broke out into laughter, slapping his thigh in his humor. “That… that is the most ridiculous assassination attempt you’ve tried yet!”
“Hey, it nearly worked, didn’t it?” The fact that his leader was still alive seemed only a minor inconvenience to his good mood.
“Oh, Primus…” Astrotrain just shook his head in amusement, chest still shaking with suppressed laughter. “Hey, wait…” He tilted his head, gazing into the middle distance. “Have you thought about why everybody you get with dies? I mean… You gotta admit, that’s some pretty messed up slag right there. I mean… are you doing…?”
“No, it’s not me.” Starscream put one pede against his work table and tipped his chair backwards. “At least, not directly - I haven’t actually figured out what it is, yet, which is something of a bother to my pride as a scientist. I’ve tried just about everything I can to achieve an alternate outcome, and had no success… Although, I would dearly like to know what causes the difference between the fatal and non-fatal… I’ve been thinking about it since the Constructicons managed to save our Glorious Leader from bleeding out. I had assumed that the other two were merely flukes, and I suppose that they still might have been…”
“Huh.”
“Indeed.”
“What about kissing?”
Starscream blinked and gave the other mech a calculating look. “Well… I have tried kissing a few times, but it was never intended to stay a make-out session. We always moved onto further things, and then… Well, I’ve already told you the outcomes.”
Astrotrain was smiling.
“You don’t seriously want to try it - not after everything I’ve just told you.”
“Maybe I’m a little intrigued…”
“Intrigued is one thing. Suicidally over-confidant is another.”
“You’re one to talk. And come on… Just a quick smooch and we’ll call it quits. No hands or anything.”
“No.”
“Please?”
“Absolutely not.”
“Even if I promise no glossa?”
“Astrotrain, if you persist in this manner of argument, I shall be forced to do something unpleasant.”
Against his better judgment, he asked. “Like what?”
“Like offer you a blowjob.”
The triplechanger made a half-choked sound that was almost a laugh, even as he cringed. “Ya know, I never would have thought of something like that as a threat before now…”
Smirking, Starscream turned back towards his work table.
-----
Dedicated to Peppymint1986, for being generally awesome. And for giving me a dozen WONDERFUl ideas for upcoming chapters. Hahaha~
This entry was originally posted at http://syntheticeuphoria.dreamwidth.org/6647.html.