All My Faith
Title: All My Faith
Rating: PG-13
Fandom: Common Law
Pairing: Travis/Wes
Warnings: None
Word Count: 1,115
Notes: Based on the episode of Friends "The One With The List" because of the angst.
Summary: Travis makes a list and things go wrong from there.
The paper shakes in his hand. He swallows thickly and inhales deeply, struggling to keep his face blank.
The Pros and Cons of Dating Wes
is the title of the paper, centered and italicized for everyone to read. The first column is 'Cons'.
-Too controlling
-OCD about everything
-Always has to be right
-Picks fights for no reason
-Hardly listens to me
-Cares too much about his yard that's not even really his
-Too cold, Ice King
-Not affectionate enough (see above)
Wes scans over the 'Pros' section and winces when there's only one thing listed.
-He's not just a one night stand
“Hey Wes, did my paperwork print?” Travis asks, giving Wes a smile as he comes up beside him.
“Yeah, yeah, it did.” Wes shoves the paper into Travis' chest and storms out of the office, not even bothering to grab his coat from the back of his chair.
Travis stares after him for a moment before glancing down at the paper in his hand. “Oh, shit.”
~*~
Wes lays on his bed, staring up at the ceiling. He and Travis have only been dating for a month, so this shouldn't make him so angry and so miserable at the same time. He's not that invested, not yet. He just wishes that his chest didn't ache so much when he thinks about that list.
A pounding at his door makes him sit up and he sighs, knowing it's Travis and not wanting to see him. He knows if he doesn't answer the door, Travis will just continue to beat on it and make a huge scene.
He wrenches the door open and stares blankly at Travis. “What do you want?”
“Wes, that list, it means nothing!” Travis says, reaching out to touch him.
Wes backs out of his reach. “I don't care.”
“Please, Wes, just let me explain.” Travis shuts the door behind him.
“What's there to explain? I think that list said it all, don't you?” Wes sneers.
“It's an incomplete list! I didn't get a chance to finish your pros.” Travis says desperately, knowing he's grasping at straws.
“I'm not interested. You can see yourself out.” Wes gestures at the door behind Travis.
“Number one: the way you're so protective over those you love. Number two: the way you smile when you think no one's watching. Number three-” Travis ignores him.
“I said I wasn't interested and I meant it.” Wes interrupts him.
“No, come on, Wes. I know how you feel.” Travis tries again, resting a hand on Wes' arm.
Wes shoves Travis' hand off of him. “Really? Do you really? Imagine the worst things you think about yourself. All your flaws that you stay up late at night picking at because you'd like to not have them, but you can't help it. All the insecurities that plague you and everything you do and make you question if you're good enough for anyone to love, much less the one you love. Every little thing that you think is wrong with yourself. Now imagine that the person you trust most in this world, the one that says they love you no matter what, not only thinks these things too, but actually uses them as reasons not to be with you.”
Travis stares at him for a moment before reaching out again. “No, Wes. I want to be with you in spite of all those things!”
Wes gives him a mockery of a smile. “Well, isn't that big of you, Travis?”
“You know what? There's nothing you could put on a list that would make me not want to be with you.” Travis says with a triumphant smile, thinking he's found a way to get back into Wes' good graces.
“There's the difference between us. I'd never make a list.” Wes says softly.
“Wes, please. It was stupid. I shouldn't have done it. I love you, really. I do. Please, just give me a chance.” Travis cups Wes' cheek.
Wes leans into the touch briefly before sighing and pulling away. “I don't think I can.”
“I can't lose you, Wes. Tell me what I have to do to make this right.” Travis pleads.
“I don't know. You can't. I know you thought those things, but I never thought you'd use them like that. I can't do this. Please go, Travis.” Wes turns away from Travis.
Travis stares at Wes' back, wanting nothing more than to take back that stupid list and erase it from Wes' mind. “I love you, Wes. You have to know that. I love you so fucking much.”
“Love isn't always enough, Travis. Please, I'm tired of talking about this. Just go.” Wes says, walking back into the bedroom and sitting back down on the edge of the bed, face buried in his hands as he hunches over.
Travis follows him into the bedroom instead and kneels on the ground in front of him. He reaches out and pulls Wes' hands away from his face, taking note of his red-rimmed eyes. “Please, Wes. Don't leave me. I need you. As my partner, as my friend, as my lover. Please.”
“Why did you make that list?” Wes asks, hurt in his voice.
“I don't know. Moment of stupidity. I shouldn't have made it. I know that.” Travis says, squeezing Wes' hands, glad he hasn't pulled them away yet.
“How am I supposed to trust you?” Wes asks, swallowing hard.
“Trust me because I love you and I'm so sorry for hurting you.” Travis strokes his thumbs across the back of Wes' hands.
Wes nods, but he doesn't say anything and he looks away from Travis.
The silence unnerves Travis and so he leans up and presses his mouth against Wes', getting a startled sound from the other man when he does.
Wes doesn't kiss back, but he doesn't push him away, so Travis counts it as a win anyway.
Travis leans back and studies Wes' face. “Please give me another chance.”
Wes stares at him for the longest time before sighing. He nods slowly. “Okay.”
Travis grins and kisses Wes again, harder this time. Wes kisses back slowly, like he's still testing the waters.
“I love you so much.” Travis murmurs when they part.
Wes smiles weakly. “I love you too. Just don't do this to me again, okay?”
“Never.” Travis whispers, leaning up and brushing his lips against Wes'.
Forgiveness is a funny thing. It warms the heart and cools the sting. ~William Arthur Ward
Rating: PG-13
Fandom: Common Law
Pairing: Travis/Wes
Warnings: None
Word Count: 1,115
Notes: Based on the episode of Friends "The One With The List" because of the angst.
Summary: Travis makes a list and things go wrong from there.
The paper shakes in his hand. He swallows thickly and inhales deeply, struggling to keep his face blank.
The Pros and Cons of Dating Wes
is the title of the paper, centered and italicized for everyone to read. The first column is 'Cons'.
-Too controlling
-OCD about everything
-Always has to be right
-Picks fights for no reason
-Hardly listens to me
-Cares too much about his yard that's not even really his
-Too cold, Ice King
-Not affectionate enough (see above)
Wes scans over the 'Pros' section and winces when there's only one thing listed.
-He's not just a one night stand
“Hey Wes, did my paperwork print?” Travis asks, giving Wes a smile as he comes up beside him.
“Yeah, yeah, it did.” Wes shoves the paper into Travis' chest and storms out of the office, not even bothering to grab his coat from the back of his chair.
Travis stares after him for a moment before glancing down at the paper in his hand. “Oh, shit.”
~*~
Wes lays on his bed, staring up at the ceiling. He and Travis have only been dating for a month, so this shouldn't make him so angry and so miserable at the same time. He's not that invested, not yet. He just wishes that his chest didn't ache so much when he thinks about that list.
A pounding at his door makes him sit up and he sighs, knowing it's Travis and not wanting to see him. He knows if he doesn't answer the door, Travis will just continue to beat on it and make a huge scene.
He wrenches the door open and stares blankly at Travis. “What do you want?”
“Wes, that list, it means nothing!” Travis says, reaching out to touch him.
Wes backs out of his reach. “I don't care.”
“Please, Wes, just let me explain.” Travis shuts the door behind him.
“What's there to explain? I think that list said it all, don't you?” Wes sneers.
“It's an incomplete list! I didn't get a chance to finish your pros.” Travis says desperately, knowing he's grasping at straws.
“I'm not interested. You can see yourself out.” Wes gestures at the door behind Travis.
“Number one: the way you're so protective over those you love. Number two: the way you smile when you think no one's watching. Number three-” Travis ignores him.
“I said I wasn't interested and I meant it.” Wes interrupts him.
“No, come on, Wes. I know how you feel.” Travis tries again, resting a hand on Wes' arm.
Wes shoves Travis' hand off of him. “Really? Do you really? Imagine the worst things you think about yourself. All your flaws that you stay up late at night picking at because you'd like to not have them, but you can't help it. All the insecurities that plague you and everything you do and make you question if you're good enough for anyone to love, much less the one you love. Every little thing that you think is wrong with yourself. Now imagine that the person you trust most in this world, the one that says they love you no matter what, not only thinks these things too, but actually uses them as reasons not to be with you.”
Travis stares at him for a moment before reaching out again. “No, Wes. I want to be with you in spite of all those things!”
Wes gives him a mockery of a smile. “Well, isn't that big of you, Travis?”
“You know what? There's nothing you could put on a list that would make me not want to be with you.” Travis says with a triumphant smile, thinking he's found a way to get back into Wes' good graces.
“There's the difference between us. I'd never make a list.” Wes says softly.
“Wes, please. It was stupid. I shouldn't have done it. I love you, really. I do. Please, just give me a chance.” Travis cups Wes' cheek.
Wes leans into the touch briefly before sighing and pulling away. “I don't think I can.”
“I can't lose you, Wes. Tell me what I have to do to make this right.” Travis pleads.
“I don't know. You can't. I know you thought those things, but I never thought you'd use them like that. I can't do this. Please go, Travis.” Wes turns away from Travis.
Travis stares at Wes' back, wanting nothing more than to take back that stupid list and erase it from Wes' mind. “I love you, Wes. You have to know that. I love you so fucking much.”
“Love isn't always enough, Travis. Please, I'm tired of talking about this. Just go.” Wes says, walking back into the bedroom and sitting back down on the edge of the bed, face buried in his hands as he hunches over.
Travis follows him into the bedroom instead and kneels on the ground in front of him. He reaches out and pulls Wes' hands away from his face, taking note of his red-rimmed eyes. “Please, Wes. Don't leave me. I need you. As my partner, as my friend, as my lover. Please.”
“Why did you make that list?” Wes asks, hurt in his voice.
“I don't know. Moment of stupidity. I shouldn't have made it. I know that.” Travis says, squeezing Wes' hands, glad he hasn't pulled them away yet.
“How am I supposed to trust you?” Wes asks, swallowing hard.
“Trust me because I love you and I'm so sorry for hurting you.” Travis strokes his thumbs across the back of Wes' hands.
Wes nods, but he doesn't say anything and he looks away from Travis.
The silence unnerves Travis and so he leans up and presses his mouth against Wes', getting a startled sound from the other man when he does.
Wes doesn't kiss back, but he doesn't push him away, so Travis counts it as a win anyway.
Travis leans back and studies Wes' face. “Please give me another chance.”
Wes stares at him for the longest time before sighing. He nods slowly. “Okay.”
Travis grins and kisses Wes again, harder this time. Wes kisses back slowly, like he's still testing the waters.
“I love you so much.” Travis murmurs when they part.
Wes smiles weakly. “I love you too. Just don't do this to me again, okay?”
“Never.” Travis whispers, leaning up and brushing his lips against Wes'.
Forgiveness is a funny thing. It warms the heart and cools the sting. ~William Arthur Ward