(no subject)
I want to talk about someone making a decision that upset me and the boundaries between them being allowed to have their own autonomy and make their own decisions with support and without judgement and me feeling disappointed and upset and as though they as making a huge mistake.
The closest I can come is to figure that I can feel however I want to feel as long as I don't voice my (unasked) opinion and impose my judgement. And if I need to I am allowed to put some distance between myself and this person because while she is entitled to her autonomy I am also entitled to remove myself from situations that I perceive to be emotionally damaging and/or traumatic to me.
This fucking sucks because I always considered myself to be so open and accepting with regards to other people's life choices, but sometimes people make choices I just cannot force myself to accept or agree with. So pretty much the only thing I can do is distance myself right now to give both of us space to work with and live with our emotions... right?
To force myself to accept (or act like I accept) a decision that causes me pain and distress is just as disingenuous as chastising and judging her for a decision that is hers alone to make. I think.
Mostly I feel guilty because I cannot offer unconditional support.
I hope these vagaries make sense to someone else, because I feel very nonsensical right now.
The closest I can come is to figure that I can feel however I want to feel as long as I don't voice my (unasked) opinion and impose my judgement. And if I need to I am allowed to put some distance between myself and this person because while she is entitled to her autonomy I am also entitled to remove myself from situations that I perceive to be emotionally damaging and/or traumatic to me.
This fucking sucks because I always considered myself to be so open and accepting with regards to other people's life choices, but sometimes people make choices I just cannot force myself to accept or agree with. So pretty much the only thing I can do is distance myself right now to give both of us space to work with and live with our emotions... right?
To force myself to accept (or act like I accept) a decision that causes me pain and distress is just as disingenuous as chastising and judging her for a decision that is hers alone to make. I think.
Mostly I feel guilty because I cannot offer unconditional support.
I hope these vagaries make sense to someone else, because I feel very nonsensical right now.