Yule, Christmas, and the Spirit Therein
Back home after Boston. Spent almost 8 hours in the car, owing to crap weather and such, so I had a lot of time to think.
Curled up in "my" corner of the couch. Now that we've moved the living room I no longed have my little nook under the eaves, but I've got a corner with a lamp and I'm close to the Yule tree, so this will do.
The last of the presents are under the tree, ready to be bagged and go to family Christmas tomorrow. I've already exchanged gifts with David and Hilary and with the guys in our little pollyanna (am I the only one that calls it that? Regional thing? Dunno.) Work exchange is done too.
It's only Christmas eve and I feel like Christmas is winding down. I missed lapistigra's party and am kind of bummed about that. Had an awesome time doing my own, totally different kind of celebrating w/ Becke and crew, though. I think what it boiled down to is that I wish, whatever we'd chosen to do, the three of us could have done it together. Ah well. Next year, maybe. And lots of chances for other bonding and new traditions in between.
It's not that I've lost the spirit of Christmas, as I had originally thought. No, I still feel it. I felt it when Hilary, David and I trimmed our little tree and exchanged gifts. I felt it at Roxi's baking cookies on Thursday night, using mom's cookie press that I'd grown up watching her use every Christmas. I felt it at Becke's gorging myself on delicious turkey leftovers and laughing, I felt it when Mark made the dining room into ritual space and we sat around and toasted and drank home-brewed mead. I anticipate I'll feel it tonight at Yuleide movie-fest, and again tomorrow at family Christmas. Hell, I even felt it whilst gleefully ordering my Yule gifts off the internet, thinking how much fun people would have opening them and how they'd enjoy them.
The only time I CAN'T feel the spirit, I've realised, is when I'm alone. This, now that I've had some perspective, makes perfect sense. A plastic tree covered in glittery crap is still just a plastic tree covered in glittery crap. The stuff under it is just stuff. The trappings and accoutrements are just visual aides.
The magic is in the people, in the coming together.
Lighting trees in darkness, learning new ways from the old, and
Making sense of history and drawing warmth out of the cold
So I don't panic as I sit here in the quiet house, cats sacked out all around me and David snoring peacefully in the other room. I don't worry that I can't feel the Christmas spirit. It'll come back the instant I surround myself with friends and family, intent on just being together, having fun, keeping warm, trading some laughs and eating some good food.
The people that say "Jesus is the reason for the season"? Well I think Yeshua ben Yosef, the carpenter's son, would approve of any excuse to sit together and share a little kindness. Oddly enough I don't think that idea conflicts with what Yule means to me at all -- light the fires, wait for the dawn, feast and be joyful for the light is returning.
I try to use "Yule" for the actual religious solstice celebration. I tend to term other events to be "Christmas." Like the gift exchange and modest feast at my parents' tomorrow will be Christmas. Christmas with my family has always been completely secular. Mom only ever put out the creche because a family member or family friend made it. Christmas has always been just a time for family and gifts and fires and games. No religious overtones at all. Yule is my religious holiday. Christmas is my secular togetherness time with friends and family alike and seems to take up the entire week leading up to Christmas day.
I think the other thing that had me tied in knots earlier this season is that this is only my second Christmas out on my own. Last year was so full of other stuff that, although we had a tree and some gifts, it didn't really have time to hit me that this was Christmas, with Hilary and David, in our own apartment. This year, as so many things are calmer, it became apparent that as a grownup one must plan and execute Christmas if one wants to have one at all. Distant friends and relatives must be given due time and consideration on the visiting schedule. Gone are the weekends of one big gathering for everyone -- time has to be apportioned out between preparing the home and visiting. Santa still visits our house but now I do his shopping. ;) The way Christmas happens really CHANGED for me this year. Or at least it really HIT me this year how it's different now. Christmas used to be a slow build from the beginning of December until Christmas day -- gradually the decorations would go up, the baking would start, gifts would start to appear under the tree as the shopping and wrapping got done. Life moves at a different pace now and I'm responsible for more. That's not a bad thing, it's just the way of being an adult and... well to be frank I just never think of myself as a grown-up. More like an overgrown teenager playing an extended game of house.
But I ramble. Point is, just because things are different now doesn't mean Christmas is dead or the spirit is gone. I just have to seek it a little differently than I used to. And now that I know that, that's OK too.
Woo. Yay perspective! It was a little gift from David. But I think his wrapping techniques need some work. ;) Still, an appreciated and useful gift, once one gets down to it.
Now I'm off to quietly spend the day at home while boyfriend gently sleeps in the next room.
May your fires burn bright and warm
May your cup never run dry
May your loved ones surround you
May your gifts be returned upon you nine-fold
And may the return of the light be joyous for you and yours.
Ooo, that was good. Have to remember that and use it for cards next year. Yes, SOME YEAR I will do a mass holiday card mailing. See if I don't!!
Curled up in "my" corner of the couch. Now that we've moved the living room I no longed have my little nook under the eaves, but I've got a corner with a lamp and I'm close to the Yule tree, so this will do.
The last of the presents are under the tree, ready to be bagged and go to family Christmas tomorrow. I've already exchanged gifts with David and Hilary and with the guys in our little pollyanna (am I the only one that calls it that? Regional thing? Dunno.) Work exchange is done too.
It's only Christmas eve and I feel like Christmas is winding down. I missed lapistigra's party and am kind of bummed about that. Had an awesome time doing my own, totally different kind of celebrating w/ Becke and crew, though. I think what it boiled down to is that I wish, whatever we'd chosen to do, the three of us could have done it together. Ah well. Next year, maybe. And lots of chances for other bonding and new traditions in between.
It's not that I've lost the spirit of Christmas, as I had originally thought. No, I still feel it. I felt it when Hilary, David and I trimmed our little tree and exchanged gifts. I felt it at Roxi's baking cookies on Thursday night, using mom's cookie press that I'd grown up watching her use every Christmas. I felt it at Becke's gorging myself on delicious turkey leftovers and laughing, I felt it when Mark made the dining room into ritual space and we sat around and toasted and drank home-brewed mead. I anticipate I'll feel it tonight at Yuleide movie-fest, and again tomorrow at family Christmas. Hell, I even felt it whilst gleefully ordering my Yule gifts off the internet, thinking how much fun people would have opening them and how they'd enjoy them.
The only time I CAN'T feel the spirit, I've realised, is when I'm alone. This, now that I've had some perspective, makes perfect sense. A plastic tree covered in glittery crap is still just a plastic tree covered in glittery crap. The stuff under it is just stuff. The trappings and accoutrements are just visual aides.
The magic is in the people, in the coming together.
Lighting trees in darkness, learning new ways from the old, and
Making sense of history and drawing warmth out of the cold
So I don't panic as I sit here in the quiet house, cats sacked out all around me and David snoring peacefully in the other room. I don't worry that I can't feel the Christmas spirit. It'll come back the instant I surround myself with friends and family, intent on just being together, having fun, keeping warm, trading some laughs and eating some good food.
The people that say "Jesus is the reason for the season"? Well I think Yeshua ben Yosef, the carpenter's son, would approve of any excuse to sit together and share a little kindness. Oddly enough I don't think that idea conflicts with what Yule means to me at all -- light the fires, wait for the dawn, feast and be joyful for the light is returning.
I try to use "Yule" for the actual religious solstice celebration. I tend to term other events to be "Christmas." Like the gift exchange and modest feast at my parents' tomorrow will be Christmas. Christmas with my family has always been completely secular. Mom only ever put out the creche because a family member or family friend made it. Christmas has always been just a time for family and gifts and fires and games. No religious overtones at all. Yule is my religious holiday. Christmas is my secular togetherness time with friends and family alike and seems to take up the entire week leading up to Christmas day.
I think the other thing that had me tied in knots earlier this season is that this is only my second Christmas out on my own. Last year was so full of other stuff that, although we had a tree and some gifts, it didn't really have time to hit me that this was Christmas, with Hilary and David, in our own apartment. This year, as so many things are calmer, it became apparent that as a grownup one must plan and execute Christmas if one wants to have one at all. Distant friends and relatives must be given due time and consideration on the visiting schedule. Gone are the weekends of one big gathering for everyone -- time has to be apportioned out between preparing the home and visiting. Santa still visits our house but now I do his shopping. ;) The way Christmas happens really CHANGED for me this year. Or at least it really HIT me this year how it's different now. Christmas used to be a slow build from the beginning of December until Christmas day -- gradually the decorations would go up, the baking would start, gifts would start to appear under the tree as the shopping and wrapping got done. Life moves at a different pace now and I'm responsible for more. That's not a bad thing, it's just the way of being an adult and... well to be frank I just never think of myself as a grown-up. More like an overgrown teenager playing an extended game of house.
But I ramble. Point is, just because things are different now doesn't mean Christmas is dead or the spirit is gone. I just have to seek it a little differently than I used to. And now that I know that, that's OK too.
Woo. Yay perspective! It was a little gift from David. But I think his wrapping techniques need some work. ;) Still, an appreciated and useful gift, once one gets down to it.
Now I'm off to quietly spend the day at home while boyfriend gently sleeps in the next room.
May your fires burn bright and warm
May your cup never run dry
May your loved ones surround you
May your gifts be returned upon you nine-fold
And may the return of the light be joyous for you and yours.
Ooo, that was good. Have to remember that and use it for cards next year. Yes, SOME YEAR I will do a mass holiday card mailing. See if I don't!!