HOOOORAYYY!
Monday night, it was almost midnight when I fell asleep. My last thought was, only a few minutes until election day...
during the night I had a dream that I was in saratoga, and Barack Obama was campaigning in a bank there. (!!) there were very few people in there, and I walked in and he smiled and shook my hand. It was a really warm wonderful smile, just in real life, and it made me happy.
And then, he won. I love him so much right now. I liked him before the election, but that speech was so good. so, so good. There aren't words. After years of listening to George W muttering and spluttering incomprehensible crap with a lot of weakness and despicable English, it was like sacred mana from heaven, hearing a presidential speech made with such impeccable English, such power and charisma, such a direct connection with the people he was speaking to. It was so good to watch the audience going crazy, screaming, crying. What a thing to be a part of.
And, it just feels amazing to me to feel proud of something this nation has done. I don't know that I've ever felt proud of our country in my life, until now.
Last night, it was like the whole world exploded. The world inside me is exploding in so many ways right now, and it feels good to realize that I've finally reached a place where I can enjoy good things in the moment, without being suspicious of them turning out badly. Maybe they will. Maybe all good things always end in pain. And maybe trusting them when they're here does make that pain only all the worse when it happens. But I don't care. At the moment, I'm fully cognizant of that and yet able to trust this joyfulness and live in it, even knowing the things I know. It's not because I'm so young and un-jaded; if anyone has fucking good reasons to be jaded, it's me. And yet, for many more reasons than the election, I feel like I have some kind of new life today.
during the night I had a dream that I was in saratoga, and Barack Obama was campaigning in a bank there. (!!) there were very few people in there, and I walked in and he smiled and shook my hand. It was a really warm wonderful smile, just in real life, and it made me happy.
And then, he won. I love him so much right now. I liked him before the election, but that speech was so good. so, so good. There aren't words. After years of listening to George W muttering and spluttering incomprehensible crap with a lot of weakness and despicable English, it was like sacred mana from heaven, hearing a presidential speech made with such impeccable English, such power and charisma, such a direct connection with the people he was speaking to. It was so good to watch the audience going crazy, screaming, crying. What a thing to be a part of.
And, it just feels amazing to me to feel proud of something this nation has done. I don't know that I've ever felt proud of our country in my life, until now.
Last night, it was like the whole world exploded. The world inside me is exploding in so many ways right now, and it feels good to realize that I've finally reached a place where I can enjoy good things in the moment, without being suspicious of them turning out badly. Maybe they will. Maybe all good things always end in pain. And maybe trusting them when they're here does make that pain only all the worse when it happens. But I don't care. At the moment, I'm fully cognizant of that and yet able to trust this joyfulness and live in it, even knowing the things I know. It's not because I'm so young and un-jaded; if anyone has fucking good reasons to be jaded, it's me. And yet, for many more reasons than the election, I feel like I have some kind of new life today.