147 Doormat
Word Soap: As The World Keeps Turning
Author: SYLnl
Title: #147 Doormat
Rating: PG
Summary: “Without feelings of respect, what is there to distinguish men from beasts?” - Confucius
Big Thanks To: ltklo, for brushing up my grammar
Previously on As The World Keeps Turning: click here for chapters 1 - 146
He gasped in surprise when he entered the building and his bewilderment made Dave McTaylor smile.
“As you can see, we’re making progress.”
“You can say that again,” Luke grinned, walking around to take it all in. “It looks almost too good…our guests won’t want to leave anymore.”
They both laughed.
“Well…you said you wanted the best…”
Luke nodded. “I do. And you’re definitely giving it, Dave. I’m very pleased.”
“Good. And thanks for putting in a good word for me with your uncle.”
“My pleasure. He wanted the best too…” Luke grinned, “even if he had to wait his turn…”
“He didn’t even have to wait. I found some guys I worked with before and they are working next door as we speak.”
“I’ll pop in there later,” Luke checked his schedule, “I’m meeting my uncle in a hour. But first I’d like to see the barn.”
“Ah,” Dave started beaming, “you’ll be even more pleased with that. We’re almost done.”
“You’re kidding me. That fast?”
“Yeah, everything went smoothly. They’re working on the compost bins and fences right now. The stable itself is done.”
“Sounds great, do you have time to join me?”
“I’ll make time,” Dave smiled. He liked his client, especially when he could be alone with him. The way Luke and his doctor interacted always left him a little sad. Longing. Like a little boy with his nose pressed to the window of a toy store. Wishing he could have some of that too.
As if Luke had read his mind, the blond smiled back.
“Is Tristan okay?”
“Yeah, he is. As long as you don’t try to force him into something he doesn’t want to do…” Dave’s glance was a mixture of amusement and sadness, “Like talk.”
“We’re about to experience something similar,” Luke confided, “We’re taking in a little girl soon. She doesn’t talk either.”
“Oh boy, you do like a challenge, don’t you?”
“She needs a good home and Child Services believes that’s us.”
“They approached you?”
“They did,” Luke felt proud and it showed. “We weren’t even thinking about one more. You know the deal with Danny. It’s going great, but the wounds are still very present.”
“Having a sister in the house could help,” Dave suggested and Luke nodded.
“Exactly, that’s what we figured. And you’re right. It’s a challenge. But we’re ready for it.”
“Yeah, you two are pretty solid.”
“We are,” again Luke felt proud, “We’re both very committed to making this work.”
“It looks rather effortless,” Dave countered and Luke laughed.
“Looks can be very deceiving, I assure you.”
“You’re telling me your perfect doctor does some stuff that annoys you?”
Luke gave him a ‘Duh’-look.
“Of course he does. And that goes both ways. We’re both very strong-minded individuals.”
“So how do you work around that?”
“We don’t. We work through it,” Luke smiled. “One of the most valuable things I learned from Reid is acceptance. His mantra is ‘It is what it is’. To accept that life doesn’t unfold the way I think it should. To accept that the other person will not always respond the way I think he or she should and so on. Instead of manipulating and trying to get my own way.”
Dave just nodded. Acceptance. Would Waylon even be capable of something like that? He sighed.
“Sounds complicated,” the contractor mumbled and Luke chuckled.
“It is and at the same time it isn’t. It’s letting go of pre-cogged notions about how life should be and just focus on how it is and go from there.”
They walked silently for a while and then Dave sighed.
“But what if you don’t like how it is?”
“That depends on the dislike, I guess,” Luke shrugged, immediately catapulted back into memories of his relationship with Noah. “The misleading part of it is that it’s a sliding scale. The issues may not be huge in themselves, but they still could be eating away at your self-respect and self-confidence. I can honestly say that I never realized how toxic and damaging my previous relationship was, until Reid and I became a couple. At the time, I just thought it was part of the deal to efface myself if that could make Noah feel better about himself.”
Dave just nodded.
“And looking back I can see how I lost myself in the process.”
“You didn’t talk to my father, did you?”
Surprised by the question, Luke looked up and slowed down his pace.
“No? Why?”
“He mentioned the same thing, the other day,” Dave stood still, his hands in his pockets, his eyes on some distant point. “He doesn’t like the way Waylon is treating me.”
“The way you let yourself be treated,” Luke corrected him and when Dave frowned, Luke explained, “That’s another huge lesson I’ve learned. You show others how they can treat you. If you let others step all over you, you shouldn’t be surprised if they treat you like a doormat.”
In spite of the serious message, Dave laughed.
“I’ll keep that in mind. And honestly…I wouldn’t put up with all the…shit…if we didn’t have Tristan…”
“You think this is healthy for Tristan?” Luke’s question was out before he realized and his gesture was apologetic. “I don’t mean to overstep, but my parents… let’s just say they were pretty confused about themselves and their relationship, and it messed me up pretty bad. After seeing them break up and come back together several times, I didn’t question it when Noah and I ended up in that same cycle, while it should have been a clear indication that something wasn’t right.”
Dave nodded again and started to walk again.
“You have a point. Thanks.”
Luke smiled and then shifted his attention to the building up the road.
“Oh my God, you’re right…I’m very pleased with that. It looks great!”
And very naturally they slid back into the client - contractor mode.
***
“…looks great and I’m now on my way to Seth’s.”
“Tell him ‘hi’,” Reid smiled in the phone, with his eyes on the screen in front of him. If only he could exchange his paperwork for a game of chess.
“I will,” Luke promised, “Danny okay?”
Reid moved his eyes from the laptop to the two kids and their tutor.
“Very. Fully focused on his lesson.”
“Glad he’s not like me in that respect,” Luke chuckled and Reid joined him.
“You’re always very focused when you’re with me, though,” Reid’s voice dropped a little.
“True. But you’re so much more fun than algebra.”
“I feel so loved now,” Reid teased.
“As you should,” Luke chuckled, “because you are.”
“I know. So are you.”
“And loving every minute of it,” Luke assured him, “I’ll be home soon.”
“Never soon enough,” Reid’s voice was even lower now and Luke swallowed. How he loved Reid’s voice. But he could feel his body responding, so he just took a deep breath, said his goodbye, disconnected and pushed the doorbell.