If you be my bodyguard, I can be your long-lost pal.

[syl_thorn]

Late November, 1889
The Thornton Estate

Lord Carnarvon should be here any time now, and everyone is in a complete flurry. The servants are nattering about attending an actual Lord again, and my parents are fussing about everything, from the polish on the floor to the sear on the steak.

"Isn't it exciting?" Lizzie says as she bustles about my

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[al_shairan]

"From what I've been told, it's not very ladylike to do much of anything besides dress pretty and have babies."

"Well, then, though I'd hate to speak ill of your mother, if that's all she's taught you being ladylike means, she's served you ill," I say. "It's like being a gentleman. I strive to be one, which means not just wearing the appropriate clothes and holding doors open for ladies. It's about... chivalry."

"There have been numerous cases of women posing as men, whether in military or politics, and proving themselves not just competent, but extraordinary. No one thought them anything less than men until their clothes came off."

"Perhaps women who'd want to disguise themselves as men are not entirely typical women," I suggest.

"And to answer your question before, I thought there were far more dragons than those we heard of in stories, probably many more who lived and thrived than were killed by knights. It was always the knights telling the story, anyway; who's to say they spoke the truth?"

"Having lived with soldiers," I say drily, "I'd say their stories are quite frequently peppered with lies."

Sylvia leafs through the book.

"Your family history?"

"A bare bones version of it," I say. "But see, we can trace our family name back to the Wars of the Roses, though our present estate dates to the seventeenth century. It's quite a heritage," I say, looking around the library. "And this house, of course, was built this century, although there are still some remnants from previous centuries. So it's quite new, in its walls... But this has been Sherrard land for a long, long time."

[syl_thorn]

"Well, then, though I'd hate to speak ill of your mother," he begins.

"Oh, go ahead. I do often enough." I sigh.

"If that's all she's taught you being ladylike means, she's served you ill. It's like being a gentleman. I strive to be one, which means not just wearing the appropriate clothes and holding doors open for ladies. It's about... chivalry."

"Chivalry," I smirk. "Chivalry's all well and good, and has its fine points, but there's still very little for ladies to do." I lean back in my chair, trying to remember the last time I read the Chivalric Code. "I seem to recall a great deal about singing your Lord's praises and being his guiding light, and telling him he's been a very good boy and is doing great works. And of course, having children and selflessly serving your Lord forever and always." I look up at him, raising my eyebrows, "Though I do seem to recall something about having an army and defending the castle in the Lord's absence. Do you have an army?" I ask, as innocently as I can muster.

Oh, he and I are going to argue, I can see that. But now there are no parents here hovering over me to pinch or hush me, and I restrain a grin. "Perhaps women who'd want to disguise themselves as men are not entirely typical women."

"Or perhaps they are typical women who've grown tired of being told what they cannot do," I shoot back. "And perhaps they realized that the only way they would be taken seriously was to appear as men. I daresay more women than you think would do so, had they the opportunity." I certainly would. I wonder if that would shock him.

He bends over to examine the family history with me. "A bare bones version of it. But see, we can trace our family name back to the Wars of the Roses, though our present estate dates to the seventeenth century. It's quite a heritage. And this house, of course, was built this century, although there are still some remnants from previous centuries. So it's quite new, in its walls... But this has been Sherrard land for a long, long time."

"It's almost dizzying, to think of." I comment, looking around, then back down at the chart, at the names going back over the centuries. "My own family...well, I think my great-grandfather was the bastard son of some earl or another. I'm afraid I have little to add to such a history."

[al_shairan]

"Though I do seem to recall something about having an army and defending the castle in the Lord's absence. Do you have an army?"

I smile a little.

"I was in an army, you may recall, and so I suppose I was a defender of the castle. Well, I would have been, if my career had kept me there... I'm glad to be here, though. I think I can defend Excolo better than I could England."

"And perhaps they realized that the only way they would be taken seriously was to appear as men. I daresay more women than you think would do so, had they the opportunity."

I snort.

"I think most women would be disgusted by the idea of looking like a man," I say. "We're not in Twelfth Night, after all."

"My own family...well, I think my great-grandfather was the bastard son of some earl or another. I'm afraid I have little to add to such a history."

"Hopefully you will add a son to it, and daughters too, perhaps," I say, putting my finger next to my own name in the book. "Your name will go there, and underneath me our children, and this book will pass to them, and to their children, and to their children's children."

[syl_thorn]

"I was in an army, you may recall, and so I suppose I was a defender of the castle. Well, I would have been, if my career had kept me there... I'm glad to be here, though. I think I can defend Excolo better than I could England."

I grin back at him. "Does that mean I get to command you?" I say archly.

"I think most women would be disgusted by the idea of looking like a man. We're not in Twelfth Night, after all."

"Do you really think it was about looks, or that looks are so important to women that they would give up the opportunity to do more?" I say, raising my eyebrows. "They dressed as men because it was the only way for them to be treated as capable, and the only way for them to do the things that they did. It wasn't for aesthetics. And if we're on the subject of Shakespeare, I'd say a comparison to The Merchant of Venice would be more apt."

Alex leans over to show me where my name will go, and the names of our future children. It really is odd, to think of being attached to such a history. "It's like being part of a much greater story," I say, though I somewhat regret it once it's left my mouth. It seems rather silly.

[al_shairan]

"Does that mean I get to command you?"

I laugh a little.

"In love rather than war, I think. I'll tuck your handkerchief in my visor."

"They dressed as men because it was the only way for them to be treated as capable, and the only way for them to do the things that they did. It wasn't for aesthetics. And if we're on the subject of Shakespeare, I'd say a comparison to The Merchant of Venice would be more apt."

"It isn't about looks," I say, exasperated. "It's about - the proper order of things. I believe men and women like their differences, in general. If God intended us to be the same, then we would not have been made so differently. Instead we complement one another. If women were the same as men, they would compete with them, and that would be unharmonious." I raise my eyebrows. "And why the Merchant? I must say it's my least favourite Shakespeare play."

Despite being vaguely irritated, I do like her remark on our history.

"It's like being part of a much greater story."

My smile softens.

"That's how I think of it. It's humbling, to be part of something greater." On impulse I lean in and kiss her forehead gently. "Come, we shouldn't quarrel. You've hardly seen any of the house yet, even. Would you like to see the rest?"

[syl_thorn]

"In love rather than war, I think. I'll tuck your handkerchief in my visor."

That does make me laugh, and it's also the first time either of us has mentioned love. It gives me rather a queer feeling. We are not marrying for love, of course, but could we come to love each other? I don't know.

But now he seems to be frustrate him. "It isn't about looks. It's about - the proper order of things. I believe men and women like their differences, in general. If God intended us to be the same, then we would not have been made so differently. Instead we complement one another. If women were the same as men, they would compete with them, and that would be unharmonious. And why the Merchant? I must say it's my least favourite Shakespeare play."

"Why would it be unharmonious?" I suggest. "Might it not be that competition would improve both sexes, and therefore would improve whatever purposes they set themselves to? To be sure, we complement each other, but that doesn't mean either sex is wholly suited to one purpose, and it certainly doesn't mean that one is inherently inferior. And whatever you may say, that is the opinion held of women; that they are inferior." I'm quite enjoying myself, honestly. It's so rare that I get the chance to really debate something. "And as for Merchant, it certainly might not be Shakespeare's best, but it's an illustration of just what I was talking about. Portia dressed herself as a man to pose as Antonio's lawyer and win his trial. She was the only one able to outsmart Shylock, but the only way to do it was to dress as a man. Otherwise no one would have listened to her, Shylock would have won, and Antonio would have died. She was probably the cleverest character in the entire play, but she was ignored because she was a woman."

Well, I thought what I said was rather silly, but it seems to have made Alex happy. There's a warmth in his eyes when he looks at me now. "That's how I think of it. It's humbling, to be part of something greater." And then he leans down, pressing his lips to my forehead. It's a surprisingly intimate gesture, gentle and tender, and I am so startled that I almost flinch from it. But I am not unhappy that he did so. No. "Come, we shouldn't quarrel. You've hardly seen any of the house yet, even. Would you like to see the rest?"

"Very much," I smile, and I take his hand as he helps me rise.