BEEEn a LooNG TymE ... .
Holy shit ....
well .. buzy buzy ... things are alittle messy but im hoping it will all work out , jesus its been months scine i wrote in here -- never a great thing either ,, momz getin married ( so called ) cause its not workin out to well right now . im working whenever i can - no matter what im doing i feel soo rushed i feel soo torn no matter what it is ,, even sleepin im getin this awful axiouse feeling like no matter what it is i have to finish it faster.. blah
GooD thing .. im compleatley in luv with my mike .. been about almost 4 months now the kid is golden . wish i understooD him alil more and his actions but that comes along wiht life but to be honest i dont have it in my to argue with him just not worth it in my eyes .. less my points right ya know ...
im feelin insane distance frum my freinds my family aHH i could care less ... i start schOoL in sepT .. HoLY CrAP belive i just typd that out .. SHeeSH .. moving to free poRt eventually its takin forever . ijsut have no motivation and i dont get it ..
i also dont understand that when i think about moving out i get this god awful feelin .. its sopsoe to be a goood thing it just doesnt even out in my head at all ..!
ever just know your gona be alone ..! i never thought id be i never had a thought about how the future was going to be I NEVER FORSAW this thats for fooks sure ...! i know im gainin my independance and all that but im worried about my mom shes not helpless as caz tells me and reminds me but my mom never reasures me its gona be okay ever just want to hear that to the person u hold dearest to you .. id doo anything for her anything .. shes just in her own world sumtymes and now her world isnt includin me .. and for 24 years weve been closer than anyone can ever imagine, or try to comprehend ... i ferget what our small tiffs are over as does she we just carry on and leave it be i LUV it ..
i dont know how me moving out is goin to be , i could be syking my self out but shes soo part of me shes my next brealth as i am hers ( as she sayz ) but mentaly i *think* im ready .. the thing is its only me . no matter what mike tells me now i know hes there for me well not today and im wiGGin hardcore all day .. hell never understand it nor will he ever understand me and i dont expect him to.. its funny how people say dont worry about it and it tends to make you MuCH WorSe off than you started out --
its funny when you are in a state of crying not being able to catch Your brealth and all you can think about it can any other cars see meee in here .... were can i go to hide .. jsut park ., somone is always sumwere people are always movin and dewing i need to do beter for myslef and i amm i soo will ... why is it soo scary..
why ask why as i always said ... makes no sence none has an answer. i lOOk at my mom i see my whole world jesus .. i luv her dearly she couldnt even understand ..
i wish mike decided to come over i m much calmer when hes around and i dont get it .. i really dotn understand why our conection is soo strong and it feels soo nice .. im not understand why i wonder were he is i rarley enquire were he is its not my concern and t only worries me so eh * whatever hes a good boi .. so we all say riight . luv is a strong werd ... insanly strong to me .. * SHURGS Thas all im sayin on that note .. hope everyone is weLL .. whom ever reads my bORin PoStS :) shurGS !! muahz
well .. buzy buzy ... things are alittle messy but im hoping it will all work out , jesus its been months scine i wrote in here -- never a great thing either ,, momz getin married ( so called ) cause its not workin out to well right now . im working whenever i can - no matter what im doing i feel soo rushed i feel soo torn no matter what it is ,, even sleepin im getin this awful axiouse feeling like no matter what it is i have to finish it faster.. blah
GooD thing .. im compleatley in luv with my mike .. been about almost 4 months now the kid is golden . wish i understooD him alil more and his actions but that comes along wiht life but to be honest i dont have it in my to argue with him just not worth it in my eyes .. less my points right ya know ...
im feelin insane distance frum my freinds my family aHH i could care less ... i start schOoL in sepT .. HoLY CrAP belive i just typd that out .. SHeeSH .. moving to free poRt eventually its takin forever . ijsut have no motivation and i dont get it ..
i also dont understand that when i think about moving out i get this god awful feelin .. its sopsoe to be a goood thing it just doesnt even out in my head at all ..!
ever just know your gona be alone ..! i never thought id be i never had a thought about how the future was going to be I NEVER FORSAW this thats for fooks sure ...! i know im gainin my independance and all that but im worried about my mom shes not helpless as caz tells me and reminds me but my mom never reasures me its gona be okay ever just want to hear that to the person u hold dearest to you .. id doo anything for her anything .. shes just in her own world sumtymes and now her world isnt includin me .. and for 24 years weve been closer than anyone can ever imagine, or try to comprehend ... i ferget what our small tiffs are over as does she we just carry on and leave it be i LUV it ..
i dont know how me moving out is goin to be , i could be syking my self out but shes soo part of me shes my next brealth as i am hers ( as she sayz ) but mentaly i *think* im ready .. the thing is its only me . no matter what mike tells me now i know hes there for me well not today and im wiGGin hardcore all day .. hell never understand it nor will he ever understand me and i dont expect him to.. its funny how people say dont worry about it and it tends to make you MuCH WorSe off than you started out --
its funny when you are in a state of crying not being able to catch Your brealth and all you can think about it can any other cars see meee in here .... were can i go to hide .. jsut park ., somone is always sumwere people are always movin and dewing i need to do beter for myslef and i amm i soo will ... why is it soo scary..
why ask why as i always said ... makes no sence none has an answer. i lOOk at my mom i see my whole world jesus .. i luv her dearly she couldnt even understand ..
i wish mike decided to come over i m much calmer when hes around and i dont get it .. i really dotn understand why our conection is soo strong and it feels soo nice .. im not understand why i wonder were he is i rarley enquire were he is its not my concern and t only worries me so eh * whatever hes a good boi .. so we all say riight . luv is a strong werd ... insanly strong to me .. * SHURGS Thas all im sayin on that note .. hope everyone is weLL .. whom ever reads my bORin PoStS :) shurGS !! muahz