I would answer the door, and if that man was trying to do something bad to me, I'D ACE HIM IN THE FACE. I'm like that though. One night I came home to my house, and the garage door (that I had closed when I left) was slightly open. I grabbed something brutal from my car (I don't remember what it was, it definitely wasn't a weapon, but something that would kill a foe), and ran up to the garage, and swung open the garage door and yelled WHO THE HELL IS IN MY GARAGE!?!?!?!
Another time, I chased this guy who (frequently) broke into my house down the street with hammer in hand. He was on a bike though.
I figure if I act more insane than my foe, he (or she) is gonna hit the road. Either that, or I'm gonna get to bludgeon someone with a bowling ball or beg with a 6 pack in it or whatever the hell might be in my car or vicinity at the time.
Fuckers better not fuck with my shit.
However, I will concede that if any of my female friends were presented with this scenario, I would expect and want them to do the same. Unless of course it was my friend Annette who has a second degree black belt in Karate, then I'd be all about her kicking some burglar ass.
So, unless my crazy ass is there, please continue your practice of not answering the door when psycho rapist serial killer monkies come to your door.
Not that big a deal...tommyoftheksOctober 19 2006, 02:28:48 UTC
Syd, you need to learn to do what us New Yorkers do when we answer the door...
Knock, Knock.
(Scream from about 50 yards away, sounding half pissed off) Who?!
The "sounding pissed off" part is very crucial. You cannot sound inviting at all, because if you do, you're just asking for trouble. But, if not, whoever is on the otherside is going to get the message that they better have a good fucking reason to be knocking at your fucking door at all, never mind at fucking 9:30 at night. You need to sound like if these people don't have a good fucking reason to be at your door, they better step the fuck off because they fucking get rocked with a fucking barrage of bullets right up their ass.
Seriously.
Hell, you shouldn't be answering doors without doing that AT ALL. I don't give a fuck where the hell you live. None of this, "let me be a good neighbor and open the door" bullshit. Fuck that. There are some crazy fucks out there, and it don't matter where you live.
Last thing I need to hear is you getting nature raped or something. :-)
Another time, I chased this guy who (frequently) broke into my house down the street with hammer in hand. He was on a bike though.
I figure if I act more insane than my foe, he (or she) is gonna hit the road. Either that, or I'm gonna get to bludgeon someone with a bowling ball or beg with a 6 pack in it or whatever the hell might be in my car or vicinity at the time.
Fuckers better not fuck with my shit.
However, I will concede that if any of my female friends were presented with this scenario, I would expect and want them to do the same. Unless of course it was my friend Annette who has a second degree black belt in Karate, then I'd be all about her kicking some burglar ass.
So, unless my crazy ass is there, please continue your practice of not answering the door when psycho rapist serial killer monkies come to your door.
Reply
Reply
Reply
Knock, Knock.
(Scream from about 50 yards away, sounding half pissed off) Who?!
The "sounding pissed off" part is very crucial. You cannot sound inviting at all, because if you do, you're just asking for trouble. But, if not, whoever is on the otherside is going to get the message that they better have a good fucking reason to be knocking at your fucking door at all, never mind at fucking 9:30 at night. You need to sound like if these people don't have a good fucking reason to be at your door, they better step the fuck off because they fucking get rocked with a fucking barrage of bullets right up their ass.
Seriously.
Hell, you shouldn't be answering doors without doing that AT ALL. I don't give a fuck where the hell you live. None of this, "let me be a good neighbor and open the door" bullshit. Fuck that. There are some crazy fucks out there, and it don't matter where you live.
Last thing I need to hear is you getting nature raped or something. :-)
-Ray
Reply
thanks for the tips. ill put them to good use in my ghetto fab home.
Reply
Leave a comment