October Roadtrip of Screwing Nepal 2010.
One day I got an IM from Katie. Maybe it was an email. And it was a very enthusiastic, don't you want to drive to Boston and pick me up and then drive across the entire state of Massachusetts to see my brother Charlie and MassMOCA? And honestly, I instinctively said hell yes because it's less than the twenty one hour drive it used to take to get to college in Miami, so I'm pretty golden. There was a chance we could meet a Baldwin, too, but I messed that up by having plans a certain weekend. I did, though, while Charlie was talking to Alec Baldwin, see the stage play To Kill a Mockingbird for the first time - so now the reference they made to it on Pretty Little Liars makes some sense.
We wound up going the following weekend, and I split from work a half hour earlier than I had planned to early-split so that I could get an oil change. Only overdue by like seven months, what. Two filters needed replacing, too, so it was an expensive trip. But I got the pretty oil change guy to say the word "fuck," so I think it was money well spent.
I will now assault your sensibilities with autumnal highway photographs. Your welcome for cutting them down to as few as I did, and for editing them together, although I think now they load like they are off somewhere, too busy contemplating the meaning of life to come to eljay.
The way home and the way there are intermingled, but you get the point - I was on the highway for a long time, and it was very very pretty.
On the way to Boston, sometimes the road was curvy and sometimes the road was straight and sometimes I saw ridiculous clouds ahead but never actually got to be under them.
Being that my civic is infinitely less comfortable for long rides than my previous cars, I saw this guy from Maryland and I thought,
I am so happy I am not coming from Maryland. That is a bitch of a drive, and there are like 10 tolls, too!
At some point I hit traffic and I thought to myself, WTF THERE IS NOTHING HERE WHAT COULD POSSIBLY BE HERE TO CAUSE THIS. And so I looked at my GPS and I was right.
There is literally NOTHING THERE. My GPS has little symbols that pop up for gas stations and stores and hospitals and BODIES OF WATER and YOU KNOW, ROADS... There is NOTHING on this stretch of road. Color me irritated by nonsensical traffic jams.
This is what it usually looks like - Look, you even know where there is a sports field area. Usually.
Here is my happier moment of the journey, where I finally got to see that damn pilgrim hat. I love that sign, I find it hilarious.
AND THEN I GOT TO BOSTON! YAYYYYY, and it was so easy to find Katie's new(ish) apartment and I didn't have to go through Harvard Square, the idea of which seriously freaked me out for hours, possibly days, before my arrival.
I got the grand tour, took no photos, Katie donated some metro tickets my way, and we headed for some fantastic fancy personal pan pizza and a movie. We had a choice between Hereafter and Life As We Know It but because of the obscenely bad reviews I've heard about the first, I chose to see the romantic comedy. Warning: If you see this movie, bring tissues. When I left I felt like a little emotional yo-yo. I FREAKIN' LOVED IT. I am pretty easy to please, but still. It was great. Then I lost my scarf at the movie theatre, later discovering that it was never turned in AKA the girls that swept up popcorn have a new scarf, and we got cupcakes and watched Ladybugs on instant view Netflix. Who doesn't miss Jonathan Brandis? I mean really. Brandis, River Phoenix... It's a piece of my childhood when these people die. AT LEAST WE STILL HAVE WIL WHEATON.
(High on coffee, sorry.)
So then her roommate said something bizarre - ACT SURPRISED - about how could Katie possibly know her sleep schedule (since they only live together and sleep four feet away from eachother) and we went to bed so we could wake up for the early start to North Adams, Bumblefuck, MA.
As we entered the town, I stopped at a red light long enough say something like, "WTF?"
And I read the signed in these windows and lolled because car trips make everything entertaining :D
Closeups for your pleasure:
Also on the way, we saw Aladdin's Genie selling Dominoes Pizza. I don't have that picture, Katie does. A few more blocks down the road, a gorilla and a banana were ALSO selling Dominoes Pizza. Makes PERFECT SENSE TO ME.
I got to meet Charlie and it was weird. Here's why it was weird:
It was like I already knew him - Exactly how I feel with people I meet from LJ. EXCEPT HE HAS NO ELJAY! So beware people! The people you mention here will be just as real to me as you are, apparently. Especially if they are camerawhores.
OMG I JUST REMEMBERED I FORGOT TO TAKE A DAMN PICTURE IN HIS APARTMENT. There is a switch in the kitchen and there is a piece of paper around it, with a hole in the middle for the switch, and it reads, like, "Do not flip this switch!" And in case some drunk or stoned ass wipe was all why, what would happen?? it continues on, "If you do, you will be turning off the HEAT." It cracked me up. You know what else cracked me up?
Reading signs that read:
Ashuwillticook Rail Trail
I made Katie pronounce it, I'm going to guesstimate, forty bajillion times. I told Charlie he had to take a picture of the sign for me because we ended up leaving at night, which I'll get to, but I forgot to remind him so you get no photo.
What happened then. OH!
We were welcomed by Vermont!
(On the way to Vermont, The Cat in the Hat was also selling Dominoes Pizza.)
We went to:
The Pownal View Barn. Where cows lounged in a field twenty feet over, and there was a moose.
Charlie had a staring contest with the moose.
Charlie seems at ease with the moose.
Charlie poses lovingly with the moose.
Charlie later tried to milk the moose. True story.
Katie was very essited about Vermont:
We went inside the store and they had ridiculous amounts of candies, jams, honeys, cheeses... We got a free sample of some jam and some cheese. Katie bought jam. I bought... salt water taffy.
Blurry jam!
Poorly lit monkey hanging from a lamp?
Entertaining snack that reminded me of Allie!
We went back to Massachusetts and headed for lunch and the museum. Between, we saw:
MYSTERIOUS FOOTPRINTS WITH NO MEANING
I'm sure they lead somewhere, but to where, I do not know. Possibly to Ashuwilltikook Rail Trail. I am making that up.
And we saw:
A ROCK. It's art. It was created by Meryl Streep's husband if I remember the audio tour (Charlie) correctly.
Toward the MoCA entrance... Where is it, how ever will we find it??
BUT WHICH WAYYYYYY?????
ARE YOU SURE WE ARE HEADING THE RIGHT DIRECTION?? PERHAPS THIS HUNDRED FOOT SIGN ON A ROOFTOP IN FRONT OF A HILLSIDE IS SOME SORT OF CLUE???
Anyway, closing in on the entrance, an art slash science project,
Trees grow toward the sun, not gravity. GOOD TO KNOW! And pretty, too!
Charlie, big intern on campus, got us free entry and we got fabulous stickers!
We saw signs that said STOP!
But did that stop us? NOOOOO! Charlie took us behind doors we did not belong behind, and explained art to us that I would never have had any idea about. Insider scoops. Tension between the art and the floor! The fact that the pretty flower sculpture actually had the Mother Mary under there somewhere and signified death! Or something! I am a bad listener, but it really was interesting shit!
You get photos of my favorite parts, luckily where photos were allowed! It was called Material World and these artists each used these not-artist materials and filled the most ridiculously fantastic rooms. Each room was like a big OOOOooooooooooo for me. And here is my legal disclaimer:
The following photographs show art installations, currently being exhibited in MASS MoCA, by these artists: Michael Beutler, Orly Genger, Tobias Putrih, Alyson Shotz, Dan Steinhilber, and collaborators Wade Kavanaugh and Stephen B. Nguyen
Something like that. Facts stolen directly from the museum's website.
This room here I was in instant love with - All the shadows on the floor made me so happy.
I was so entranced that I didn't notice the next room until I was pulled away and then I walked towards it and was in utter holy shit mode.
It's like, a crocheted land of cushy awesome that breaks through a museum wall, ffs!
More playing with light, and Charlie told us that the tension in the cables is actually so intense, they put metal plates between the sheet rock so the walls wouldn't come down. All lighting in this room is from a single bulb.
Faux Tissue Trees- Roots on one floor, bits of "bark" going up a staircase, and the rest of the trees on the next floor up,
That last shot there is thanks solely to Charlie who knows all the ins and outs and coolest places to stand because he gives real tours and he showed us his favorites!
The day we were there was some kind of opening gala, with apple cider that I stole, and a whole story about space flight and possibly time travel that led to this art exhibit:
We did not go in, but apparently you can totally tour the inside.
Because it was a special day, there was also a band.
Is it possible to take these people seriously?
We ran far away from the band, I took a picture of one of Charlie's coworkers because he had a strange mouth, or enormous face, or something very werewolfy about him...
And then I stole Katie so that we could say we were actually in the same place together. With proof of autumn in the background.
We left the museum (bye bye backwards MoCA!)
and headed to sort of nap slash lay slash rest our brains at Charlie's apartment. We decided to skip out on the enticement of "free indian food" and instead we made the best decision EVER. We went to a local pizza place and then to see a documentary (followed by a chocoholic's dream party) since there was a film festival running.
On the way to pizza, we passed a Big Y. Charlie said it was the most thoughtful supermarket in the world, or something. The Big Why. I always thought it was an extension of KMart, but it is a market. I feel much smarter now.
The pizza place was awesome. Family run, and some crazy ladies ordering ahead of us. They gave us food without charging us. The photo taking probably started with this ode to family karaoke:
and then became the owner's son saying, "pop! they want to take a picture of you!"
And I do not take that opportunity lightly, so you get this:
I believe he called the crazy people from earlier crazy, and Charlie tried to explain that ordering pizza isn't as complicated as it seemed as we stood in line waiting for the crazy to leave.
Off to the film festival, the program said WTF, so I took a picture.
The documentary we saw was called Lucky and we all highly recommend it. I also highly recommend seeing a Q&A with the producer, Sean Welch, because he is superb. SUPERB. And his movie is great! It's about lottery winners and the shit they go through. Crazy crazy crazy amazing.
When we got back to the apartment, Charlie's fifty two housemates were all having a living room party and he felt really bad but I think it worked out for the best that we decided to just drive home that night. We packed up the car and left at 11pm. While Madonna isn't exactly made for keeping me awake on unlit highways in the middle of the night, the trip flew by just chatting away about who even knows and we made it back to Katie's in Boston by 2am. I am pretty sure we were immediately unconscious.
That whole weekend was the Head of the Charles Regatta and somehow, miraculously, we missed all the traffic that entails. We watched more TV and had a super lazy morning - wandering to the neighborhood Whole Foods for some fruit and bread - bread to spread Vermonty type jaaaaam on. Gonna have to send Charlie a SASE for more jam delivery. Deliciousness.
I think around 3pm I got up and started home, I actually saw one of the races down the river but all you get are pictures of flags and spectators.
I had dry lips the entire damn weekend and as I was driving away I found all these on the floor of my backseat. WTF, Syd. I will never have dry lips ever again.
Stopped for gas and thought, I feel like I've been here before...
And that's when I realized that about 65 miles of my trip home was also my trip to North Adams. Me and Katie stopped at the same spot to get gas on Saturday morning.
Pilgrim hat marking my way home!
Trees trees trees, marking my way hooooome!
Stopping short and losing my purse on my way hooooooome!
More treeeeeeeees marking my way hoommmmmmmmmme!
(This one you get to see that at some point I actually drove fast. It didn't last.)
Bizarre clouds marking my way home!
Raindrops marking my way home!
NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
Not any decent rain either. That constant nagging drizzle.
It drizzled on Sturbridge Village...
After CT welcomed me,
It drizzled on Hartford...
HI HARTFORRRRRRD
Notice how crisp the fence barrier and the cityscape is. It's because I was at a dead stop. Stupid Hartford. You know what else is stupid? The rest of the trip. Sunset was pretty though.
Basically the rest of the trip was spent at or below twenty miles an hour. I think it took about four and a half hours to get home. Somewhere near New Haven my mom called and asked if I was nearby and I basically told her to shove it up her ass.
Here's New Haven.
Since I was stuck in traffic I seriously debated stopping off at IKEA but Allie reminded me that it was a weekend and IKEA on a weekend was the dumbest idea I have ever had.
So I kept driving.
THE END!
We wound up going the following weekend, and I split from work a half hour earlier than I had planned to early-split so that I could get an oil change. Only overdue by like seven months, what. Two filters needed replacing, too, so it was an expensive trip. But I got the pretty oil change guy to say the word "fuck," so I think it was money well spent.
I will now assault your sensibilities with autumnal highway photographs. Your welcome for cutting them down to as few as I did, and for editing them together, although I think now they load like they are off somewhere, too busy contemplating the meaning of life to come to eljay.
The way home and the way there are intermingled, but you get the point - I was on the highway for a long time, and it was very very pretty.
On the way to Boston, sometimes the road was curvy and sometimes the road was straight and sometimes I saw ridiculous clouds ahead but never actually got to be under them.
Being that my civic is infinitely less comfortable for long rides than my previous cars, I saw this guy from Maryland and I thought,
I am so happy I am not coming from Maryland. That is a bitch of a drive, and there are like 10 tolls, too!
At some point I hit traffic and I thought to myself, WTF THERE IS NOTHING HERE WHAT COULD POSSIBLY BE HERE TO CAUSE THIS. And so I looked at my GPS and I was right.
There is literally NOTHING THERE. My GPS has little symbols that pop up for gas stations and stores and hospitals and BODIES OF WATER and YOU KNOW, ROADS... There is NOTHING on this stretch of road. Color me irritated by nonsensical traffic jams.
This is what it usually looks like - Look, you even know where there is a sports field area. Usually.
Here is my happier moment of the journey, where I finally got to see that damn pilgrim hat. I love that sign, I find it hilarious.
AND THEN I GOT TO BOSTON! YAYYYYY, and it was so easy to find Katie's new(ish) apartment and I didn't have to go through Harvard Square, the idea of which seriously freaked me out for hours, possibly days, before my arrival.
I got the grand tour, took no photos, Katie donated some metro tickets my way, and we headed for some fantastic fancy personal pan pizza and a movie. We had a choice between Hereafter and Life As We Know It but because of the obscenely bad reviews I've heard about the first, I chose to see the romantic comedy. Warning: If you see this movie, bring tissues. When I left I felt like a little emotional yo-yo. I FREAKIN' LOVED IT. I am pretty easy to please, but still. It was great. Then I lost my scarf at the movie theatre, later discovering that it was never turned in AKA the girls that swept up popcorn have a new scarf, and we got cupcakes and watched Ladybugs on instant view Netflix. Who doesn't miss Jonathan Brandis? I mean really. Brandis, River Phoenix... It's a piece of my childhood when these people die. AT LEAST WE STILL HAVE WIL WHEATON.
(High on coffee, sorry.)
So then her roommate said something bizarre - ACT SURPRISED - about how could Katie possibly know her sleep schedule (since they only live together and sleep four feet away from eachother) and we went to bed so we could wake up for the early start to North Adams, Bumblefuck, MA.
As we entered the town, I stopped at a red light long enough say something like, "WTF?"
And I read the signed in these windows and lolled because car trips make everything entertaining :D
Closeups for your pleasure:
Also on the way, we saw Aladdin's Genie selling Dominoes Pizza. I don't have that picture, Katie does. A few more blocks down the road, a gorilla and a banana were ALSO selling Dominoes Pizza. Makes PERFECT SENSE TO ME.
I got to meet Charlie and it was weird. Here's why it was weird:
It was like I already knew him - Exactly how I feel with people I meet from LJ. EXCEPT HE HAS NO ELJAY! So beware people! The people you mention here will be just as real to me as you are, apparently. Especially if they are camerawhores.
OMG I JUST REMEMBERED I FORGOT TO TAKE A DAMN PICTURE IN HIS APARTMENT. There is a switch in the kitchen and there is a piece of paper around it, with a hole in the middle for the switch, and it reads, like, "Do not flip this switch!" And in case some drunk or stoned ass wipe was all why, what would happen?? it continues on, "If you do, you will be turning off the HEAT." It cracked me up. You know what else cracked me up?
Reading signs that read:
Ashuwillticook Rail Trail
I made Katie pronounce it, I'm going to guesstimate, forty bajillion times. I told Charlie he had to take a picture of the sign for me because we ended up leaving at night, which I'll get to, but I forgot to remind him so you get no photo.
What happened then. OH!
We were welcomed by Vermont!
(On the way to Vermont, The Cat in the Hat was also selling Dominoes Pizza.)
We went to:
The Pownal View Barn. Where cows lounged in a field twenty feet over, and there was a moose.
Charlie had a staring contest with the moose.
Charlie seems at ease with the moose.
Charlie poses lovingly with the moose.
Charlie later tried to milk the moose. True story.
Katie was very essited about Vermont:
We went inside the store and they had ridiculous amounts of candies, jams, honeys, cheeses... We got a free sample of some jam and some cheese. Katie bought jam. I bought... salt water taffy.
Blurry jam!
Poorly lit monkey hanging from a lamp?
Entertaining snack that reminded me of Allie!
We went back to Massachusetts and headed for lunch and the museum. Between, we saw:
MYSTERIOUS FOOTPRINTS WITH NO MEANING
I'm sure they lead somewhere, but to where, I do not know. Possibly to Ashuwilltikook Rail Trail. I am making that up.
And we saw:
A ROCK. It's art. It was created by Meryl Streep's husband if I remember the audio tour (Charlie) correctly.
Toward the MoCA entrance... Where is it, how ever will we find it??
BUT WHICH WAYYYYYY?????
ARE YOU SURE WE ARE HEADING THE RIGHT DIRECTION?? PERHAPS THIS HUNDRED FOOT SIGN ON A ROOFTOP IN FRONT OF A HILLSIDE IS SOME SORT OF CLUE???
Anyway, closing in on the entrance, an art slash science project,
Trees grow toward the sun, not gravity. GOOD TO KNOW! And pretty, too!
Charlie, big intern on campus, got us free entry and we got fabulous stickers!
We saw signs that said STOP!
But did that stop us? NOOOOO! Charlie took us behind doors we did not belong behind, and explained art to us that I would never have had any idea about. Insider scoops. Tension between the art and the floor! The fact that the pretty flower sculpture actually had the Mother Mary under there somewhere and signified death! Or something! I am a bad listener, but it really was interesting shit!
You get photos of my favorite parts, luckily where photos were allowed! It was called Material World and these artists each used these not-artist materials and filled the most ridiculously fantastic rooms. Each room was like a big OOOOooooooooooo for me. And here is my legal disclaimer:
The following photographs show art installations, currently being exhibited in MASS MoCA, by these artists: Michael Beutler, Orly Genger, Tobias Putrih, Alyson Shotz, Dan Steinhilber, and collaborators Wade Kavanaugh and Stephen B. Nguyen
Something like that. Facts stolen directly from the museum's website.
This room here I was in instant love with - All the shadows on the floor made me so happy.
I was so entranced that I didn't notice the next room until I was pulled away and then I walked towards it and was in utter holy shit mode.
It's like, a crocheted land of cushy awesome that breaks through a museum wall, ffs!
More playing with light, and Charlie told us that the tension in the cables is actually so intense, they put metal plates between the sheet rock so the walls wouldn't come down. All lighting in this room is from a single bulb.
Faux Tissue Trees- Roots on one floor, bits of "bark" going up a staircase, and the rest of the trees on the next floor up,
That last shot there is thanks solely to Charlie who knows all the ins and outs and coolest places to stand because he gives real tours and he showed us his favorites!
The day we were there was some kind of opening gala, with apple cider that I stole, and a whole story about space flight and possibly time travel that led to this art exhibit:
We did not go in, but apparently you can totally tour the inside.
Because it was a special day, there was also a band.
Is it possible to take these people seriously?
We ran far away from the band, I took a picture of one of Charlie's coworkers because he had a strange mouth, or enormous face, or something very werewolfy about him...
And then I stole Katie so that we could say we were actually in the same place together. With proof of autumn in the background.
We left the museum (bye bye backwards MoCA!)
and headed to sort of nap slash lay slash rest our brains at Charlie's apartment. We decided to skip out on the enticement of "free indian food" and instead we made the best decision EVER. We went to a local pizza place and then to see a documentary (followed by a chocoholic's dream party) since there was a film festival running.
On the way to pizza, we passed a Big Y. Charlie said it was the most thoughtful supermarket in the world, or something. The Big Why. I always thought it was an extension of KMart, but it is a market. I feel much smarter now.
The pizza place was awesome. Family run, and some crazy ladies ordering ahead of us. They gave us food without charging us. The photo taking probably started with this ode to family karaoke:
and then became the owner's son saying, "pop! they want to take a picture of you!"
And I do not take that opportunity lightly, so you get this:
I believe he called the crazy people from earlier crazy, and Charlie tried to explain that ordering pizza isn't as complicated as it seemed as we stood in line waiting for the crazy to leave.
Off to the film festival, the program said WTF, so I took a picture.
The documentary we saw was called Lucky and we all highly recommend it. I also highly recommend seeing a Q&A with the producer, Sean Welch, because he is superb. SUPERB. And his movie is great! It's about lottery winners and the shit they go through. Crazy crazy crazy amazing.
When we got back to the apartment, Charlie's fifty two housemates were all having a living room party and he felt really bad but I think it worked out for the best that we decided to just drive home that night. We packed up the car and left at 11pm. While Madonna isn't exactly made for keeping me awake on unlit highways in the middle of the night, the trip flew by just chatting away about who even knows and we made it back to Katie's in Boston by 2am. I am pretty sure we were immediately unconscious.
That whole weekend was the Head of the Charles Regatta and somehow, miraculously, we missed all the traffic that entails. We watched more TV and had a super lazy morning - wandering to the neighborhood Whole Foods for some fruit and bread - bread to spread Vermonty type jaaaaam on. Gonna have to send Charlie a SASE for more jam delivery. Deliciousness.
I think around 3pm I got up and started home, I actually saw one of the races down the river but all you get are pictures of flags and spectators.
I had dry lips the entire damn weekend and as I was driving away I found all these on the floor of my backseat. WTF, Syd. I will never have dry lips ever again.
Stopped for gas and thought, I feel like I've been here before...
And that's when I realized that about 65 miles of my trip home was also my trip to North Adams. Me and Katie stopped at the same spot to get gas on Saturday morning.
Pilgrim hat marking my way home!
Trees trees trees, marking my way hooooome!
Stopping short and losing my purse on my way hooooooome!
More treeeeeeeees marking my way hoommmmmmmmmme!
(This one you get to see that at some point I actually drove fast. It didn't last.)
Bizarre clouds marking my way home!
Raindrops marking my way home!
NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
Not any decent rain either. That constant nagging drizzle.
It drizzled on Sturbridge Village...
After CT welcomed me,
It drizzled on Hartford...
HI HARTFORRRRRRD
Notice how crisp the fence barrier and the cityscape is. It's because I was at a dead stop. Stupid Hartford. You know what else is stupid? The rest of the trip. Sunset was pretty though.
Basically the rest of the trip was spent at or below twenty miles an hour. I think it took about four and a half hours to get home. Somewhere near New Haven my mom called and asked if I was nearby and I basically told her to shove it up her ass.
Here's New Haven.
Since I was stuck in traffic I seriously debated stopping off at IKEA but Allie reminded me that it was a weekend and IKEA on a weekend was the dumbest idea I have ever had.
So I kept driving.
THE END!