i forgot something, well alot of things
hello everyone, sorry for the last moody entry i wrote, i didnt mean to freak anyone out but thats how i get alot of the times but i have no one to really vent to so i put all my energy's into damn live journal. Very lame but what can you do.
Ok,i need to talk to my boss tommorow about getting my damn insurance for work. As u all can see i'm not at work today because i'm sick as hell. Had another flare up today and it was horrible. I know why its happened because even thou i've stopped eating red meat{a little over a month now} and cut down alot of my sugar intake and caffeine and such, but i still eat fast food every single day, which i know caused it. So i really need to change my diet a.s.a.p. as well as get my insurance so i can go see my doctor who i havent seen in over 2 years and get my meds again.
I've been going to a dry spot creatively but with this my love for music has been ever more intact
Yesterday i had what i think to be jimi hendrix's spirit inside me, and before u all laugh and think i'm insane i shall explain. It happened after jimi sang the line "And all these emotions of mine keep holding me from, eh,
Giving my life to a rainbow like you". Right after that line was sung. i let out this huge sigh and i felt this like force going thru my body from my head to my toes and i felt very light after it left, I'm convinced it was the spirit of jimi! needless to say it was amazing. I love the emotions i feel and get from music. Like i dont know if this happens to everyone but allmost all the time it does to me. When i'm listening to music, doing whatever i'm doing driving, reading whatever. I completely lose myself.Like when i'm driving i tend to go into autopilot, i just forget where i'm at and what i'm doing, where i'm going etc etc. I go into the song and its a beautiful thing to me to have this,But once the song ends i snap back and i'm like "Where am i" what am i doing etc etc. even the cluelessness of it to me is amazing. That music can have such a effect on my brain to me is a amazing thing.
Another thing ive been thinking about
Whats with me and girls with the name megan, or meghan?
The last 3 girls i've had a crush on or have/had liked me have all shared the same name.
Well the first megan i dont speak to anymore
The second meghan! had a crush on me, and at the time it really freaked me out that someone had so much love for me, foolishly i rejected it and later on i began to feel the same feelings for her as she did me but it was by then too late and by then my big mouth ruined everything. But now everything is cool and we still speak to eachother and hopefully soon we will hang out sometime!
And this brings me to the latest megan in my life, i had/have a crush on her but now its just a platonic thing but i find it very hard to have my feelings of intense love for her to go away, so what i need is for some new girl to walk into che cosa and into my life, hang out for a week. ME to fall in love with, when i say love i mean my version of love, my fucked-up distorted version of love. and within a week or 2 of knowing her ask her out to be told NO! like allways and then maybe it will be easier for me to just have a strickly platonic relationship with her.But its been a real struggle for me to erase those feelings, but still i love to be around her and hang out, whenever we do.hopefully i didnt offend any of thee megan's and meghan with this entry
ok i'm done
with love
christ-ofer
Ok,i need to talk to my boss tommorow about getting my damn insurance for work. As u all can see i'm not at work today because i'm sick as hell. Had another flare up today and it was horrible. I know why its happened because even thou i've stopped eating red meat{a little over a month now} and cut down alot of my sugar intake and caffeine and such, but i still eat fast food every single day, which i know caused it. So i really need to change my diet a.s.a.p. as well as get my insurance so i can go see my doctor who i havent seen in over 2 years and get my meds again.
I've been going to a dry spot creatively but with this my love for music has been ever more intact
Yesterday i had what i think to be jimi hendrix's spirit inside me, and before u all laugh and think i'm insane i shall explain. It happened after jimi sang the line "And all these emotions of mine keep holding me from, eh,
Giving my life to a rainbow like you". Right after that line was sung. i let out this huge sigh and i felt this like force going thru my body from my head to my toes and i felt very light after it left, I'm convinced it was the spirit of jimi! needless to say it was amazing. I love the emotions i feel and get from music. Like i dont know if this happens to everyone but allmost all the time it does to me. When i'm listening to music, doing whatever i'm doing driving, reading whatever. I completely lose myself.Like when i'm driving i tend to go into autopilot, i just forget where i'm at and what i'm doing, where i'm going etc etc. I go into the song and its a beautiful thing to me to have this,But once the song ends i snap back and i'm like "Where am i" what am i doing etc etc. even the cluelessness of it to me is amazing. That music can have such a effect on my brain to me is a amazing thing.
Another thing ive been thinking about
Whats with me and girls with the name megan, or meghan?
The last 3 girls i've had a crush on or have/had liked me have all shared the same name.
Well the first megan i dont speak to anymore
The second meghan! had a crush on me, and at the time it really freaked me out that someone had so much love for me, foolishly i rejected it and later on i began to feel the same feelings for her as she did me but it was by then too late and by then my big mouth ruined everything. But now everything is cool and we still speak to eachother and hopefully soon we will hang out sometime!
And this brings me to the latest megan in my life, i had/have a crush on her but now its just a platonic thing but i find it very hard to have my feelings of intense love for her to go away, so what i need is for some new girl to walk into che cosa and into my life, hang out for a week. ME to fall in love with, when i say love i mean my version of love, my fucked-up distorted version of love. and within a week or 2 of knowing her ask her out to be told NO! like allways and then maybe it will be easier for me to just have a strickly platonic relationship with her.But its been a real struggle for me to erase those feelings, but still i love to be around her and hang out, whenever we do.hopefully i didnt offend any of thee megan's and meghan with this entry
ok i'm done
with love
christ-ofer