All I wanna do
is slap on some sun block & a bikini and soak up the sun. Its not like I'm stressed, or feel bad or anything.. I'm just lacking the sun in my life. Last week it was nice enough outside to throw on a sundress, and bring blanket outside & play with Zoie in the grass. I wish I could do that today.. I'm not sure if it will get warm enough to do that later.. I hope it does. I could really use the warm sun. Its supposed to be nice out tommorow, so I'm going to be taking advantage of that 100%.
Sometimes I don't understand myself.. I know that everyone in a family takes a role .. I'm speaking amongst my sisters & mother.. Some of us are the agressive pushers, and some are the submissive we'll do whatever to make the others happy people.. this is why I don't understand myself. I have no problem telling people to shove it.. Unless your my family. I struggle with this and it drives me crazy... I often feel guilty or obligated to do whatever it is that they want me to do so I don't have to deal with them being mad at me, or getting an attitude. I don't get that about myself.. The situation is.. As you know, my mom moved to FL almost 2yrs ago. My two oldest nieces want to fly down in June .. My mom is always asking us to come but we really can't afford it.. Not to mention if I take a vaca to FL it will be when its cold here,not in June when its actually nice in Mich what sense does that make? .. Back to my point. Since my nieces are minors I guess there is a big fee for them to fly alone, it would be cheaper for an adult ticket than it would be to straight up pay the fee. The idea is.. To ask if I would like to fly down with them, Zoie is so young she flys free.. My mom would even pay for my ticket. Sounds nice right? I find out its from June 16th (which is my bday) untill July 1st .. This is two weeks long. I cannot just up & fly away to FL on a little vaca & leave my hardworking husband here in Michigan. We haven't been married even for a whole year yet & they're asking me to just fly away for two weeks.. Thats a 1/2 a month. God forbid, too when we'd come back & Zoie be scared of Tom or something since she wouldn't see him for so many days. I honestly don't know how army wives do it really ... Here I sit..getting stressed out over this because I feel bad, now my nieces can't go unless I do, and its on my shoulders..and I'm still feeling the 'baby sister role' like I need to go so I can watch my nieces (not that they need to be watched or anything) but on the plane, etc .. then I've got my mom whos feeling bad like "oh, ricki doesnt even want to visit me ~ my kids don't even love me" .. when really she dropped me like a hot potato when i was 16 & quit skating & i wasn't her little star athlete anymore .. so thats not the case. I just hate being put in these situations. I did explain to my sister that I would not be going to FL, so the situation is settled & everything is fine now..
I just feel like.. people dont get it. I'm married I have my own family now, and a child. I can't just up & leave whenever I feel. I have obligations & people I care about here.
TTFN
Sometimes I don't understand myself.. I know that everyone in a family takes a role .. I'm speaking amongst my sisters & mother.. Some of us are the agressive pushers, and some are the submissive we'll do whatever to make the others happy people.. this is why I don't understand myself. I have no problem telling people to shove it.. Unless your my family. I struggle with this and it drives me crazy... I often feel guilty or obligated to do whatever it is that they want me to do so I don't have to deal with them being mad at me, or getting an attitude. I don't get that about myself.. The situation is.. As you know, my mom moved to FL almost 2yrs ago. My two oldest nieces want to fly down in June .. My mom is always asking us to come but we really can't afford it.. Not to mention if I take a vaca to FL it will be when its cold here,not in June when its actually nice in Mich what sense does that make? .. Back to my point. Since my nieces are minors I guess there is a big fee for them to fly alone, it would be cheaper for an adult ticket than it would be to straight up pay the fee. The idea is.. To ask if I would like to fly down with them, Zoie is so young she flys free.. My mom would even pay for my ticket. Sounds nice right? I find out its from June 16th (which is my bday) untill July 1st .. This is two weeks long. I cannot just up & fly away to FL on a little vaca & leave my hardworking husband here in Michigan. We haven't been married even for a whole year yet & they're asking me to just fly away for two weeks.. Thats a 1/2 a month. God forbid, too when we'd come back & Zoie be scared of Tom or something since she wouldn't see him for so many days. I honestly don't know how army wives do it really ... Here I sit..getting stressed out over this because I feel bad, now my nieces can't go unless I do, and its on my shoulders..and I'm still feeling the 'baby sister role' like I need to go so I can watch my nieces (not that they need to be watched or anything) but on the plane, etc .. then I've got my mom whos feeling bad like "oh, ricki doesnt even want to visit me ~ my kids don't even love me" .. when really she dropped me like a hot potato when i was 16 & quit skating & i wasn't her little star athlete anymore .. so thats not the case. I just hate being put in these situations. I did explain to my sister that I would not be going to FL, so the situation is settled & everything is fine now..
I just feel like.. people dont get it. I'm married I have my own family now, and a child. I can't just up & leave whenever I feel. I have obligations & people I care about here.
TTFN