Chasing the Storm From the Sky (2/3)
Title: Chasing the Storm From the Sky (2/3)
Pairing: TaeNy ~ guest spot by Hyoyoung
Rating: G
Genre: Romance/Drama/Fluff
Summary: Falling in love with your best friend isn't easy, and though Taeyeon thinks she knows everything about Tiffany, it turns out she might be wrong.
Wordcount: 3,071
Part 1~
It was supposed to have been their last night. Taeyeon felt it when she left Tiffany the next morning. The long goodbye, that was intimate yet carefully kept behind the lines of friendship.
She had expected Tiffany, like herself, would want to want to be left alone, but to her surprise, Tiffany kept texting her.
Everyday.
And everytime Taeyeon read those texts, that physical thing called love wrenched in her stomach.
She didn't know what to make of it. She didn't know that a simple "hi, how are you today?" could make you so unbelievably confused.
If she didn't want Taeyeon's love, then what was she after? Was it to taunt Taeyeon, or did she simply not know how to stay away from her?
Taeyeon didn't understand, and she wasn't sure she wanted to, either. Mostly she ignored the texts, and she knew Tiffany understood that.
But sometimes she answered, too. And everything was like before.
Despite feeling so confused, the expected awkwardness never arrived. But Taeyeon chose to not get too close with Tiffany again. If it was gonna end, it might aswell just end fast. With as little pain as possible.
She was doing good with moving on and ignoring, until the one day when Tiffany called her. It was the first time they had spoken since their "last" night... and Taeyeon was terrified when she answered.
"Hello?"
"Hi, it's Tiffany." Yeah, but why?
"Oh. Hi."
Silence. Was that all?
"...hello?"
"Yes, I'm sorry." Tiffany giggled at herself. "I was just, um, calling to... say that Sooyoung invited me over to her place this Friday."
What was that?
"What?"
"Yeah, uhm, I mean, she wants you and me to come over."
"Why?" Taeyeon hadn't actually told Sooyoung what had happened inside of her. And she wasn't planning to. The less reminders she got of it, the better.
"I don't know." She was sad to hear that Tiffany sounded like... a colleague you don't really like, but have to do assignments with. "Apparently some friend of hers is coming there and she wants us to meet her."
"Who?"
"I don't know, some girl from town."
"Okay."
Silence again.
"So, will you be there?" Tiffany's question broke her out of her wonderings.
"Uh... yeah, I-I guess so" Taeyeon said. She tried to be a little less than nice to Tiffany without being an outright idiot.
"Okay."
Silence.
"I'll... I'll see you, then."
"Yeah. Bye."
When the call ended, Taeyeon cried because she had never treated Tiffany in any other way than a princess before.
And talking to her like someone who didn't matter was breaking her heart.
Tiffany deserved more.
Deep breaths.
It was close to midnight, and the evening had so far been alright.
Almost okay.
In fact, in almost every way, it was a really great night. She could even look at Tiffany sometimes and forget that... their time together had to end. She had to remind herself to not laugh too hard at her jokes. Not sit too close to her. Not talk to her as much as usual.
And she had come to find, it was one of the hardest things she had ever had to do.
They were sitting on the floor in Sooyoung's room, drinking coca cola out of wine glasses. Sooyoung had always told her that drinking out of wine glasses made her feel like a grown-up, no matter what beverage.
Taeyeon used to always laugh when she thought of it.
Some weird, dark, heavy music was playing in the barely lit room. Taeyeon had no memory of Sooyoung ever liking that kind of music, but then again, she could see that her new friend, Hyoyeon, thoroughly enjoyed it...
Tiffany, on the other hand, looked outright scared.
And Taeyeon had to admit, she was a little uncomfortable. Sooyoung's house lay in the forest, in the middle of nowhere. The man on the CD's raspy voice mixed with the shadows from the trees outside and the smell of incense made a rather unfriendly blend.
"Wow, it's hot in here." Everyone's eyes turned to Hyoyeon.
"Kinda."
And Taeyeon saw how Sooyoung was looking at the older girl.
"Let's go outside."
Tiffany looked like she was about to panic at the suggestion.
"Really? S-Should we really?"
"Yeah! Why not?"
"I mean it's just... so... so late." Tiffany looked at the clock on the wall. Her terrified expression made Taeyeon want to take her in her arms and protect her from all the things that she didn't need to be protected from. The shadows. The darkness.
But she chose to protect herself.
And Sooyoung seemed very set on going outside.
"Yeah, but look at the fog!"
They all got up on their knees and looked out the window. Fullmoon and fog over a meadow - it looked just about surreal.
"Wow..."
"My thoughts exactly. So let's go!"
Hyoyeon and Sooyoung ran for the door.
Taeyeon rose from the silence and looked back at the girl on the floor. Tiffany reluctantly started to get up to follow the others...
And Taeyeon was careful not to reach out her hand to help her up.
As soon as they walked out the door, Taeyeon faced her first big problem in her plan to move on:
Frogs.
Frogs, everywhere.
She screamed.
And Sooyoung and Tiffany laughed, while Hyoyeon looked confused.
"She hates frogs." Sooyoung was fast to answer first.
"We can't walk like this! I can't do it!"
"Why not?" Tiffany looked at her, amused.
"It's gross."
Tiffany walked up to her and turned her back to her.
"Well then jump on."
"What?"
Hyoyeon and Sooyoung looked at them.
"Jump on my back!"
"Why?"
"So you don't have to walk with the frogs?"
Something inside Taeyeon ticked and exploded peacefully. She had to think up a reason to not...
"I'm way too heavy." She laughed awkwardly and wanted to smack herself.
"Don't be an idiot, shorty."
"Hey!" Taeyeon slapped her on the arm, before realising what she was doing.
Being... normal... with Tiffany. Just what she wasn't supposed to do. She cursed Sooyoung for inviting them both there that night.
"Come on, now, jump on!" Tiffany nudged her.
"Yes, come on, Tae, get a move on." Taeyeon glared at Sooyoung.
"Fine." She gave up.
She grabbed Tiffany's arms and jumped as high as she could. Tiffany caught her, stumbled a few steps, and eventually steadied.
Her hair smelled like melon.
Taeyeon tried to restrain herself, but being so close to Tiffany made all the love she felt for her ache inside her. Just like she feared it would.
She put her arms around Tiffany's neck and tried to not fall off as they started walking down the road.
The fullmoon was the only thing that gave light to their scene. It was dead silent, aside from the distant breeze in the trees on the left side of the road.
Tiffany stumbled with a squealing Taeyeon on her back, with Hyoyeon and Sooyoung wandering behind them, deep in conversation.
Taeyeon dared to sneak a look back at them, and more heard than saw Sooyoung laugh loudly at one of Hyoyeon's jokes.
She nodded to herself, half in surprise, half in a amusement.
Oh, Sooyoung.
She jumped off Tiffany's back on the field.
"There! Free from the frogs."
Taeyeon nodded. She didn't want to say anything. The cheeriness in Tiffany's voice made her want to scream with guilt.
Sooyoung and Hyoyeon caught up to them and Taeyeon was saved.
"Wow..."
Hyoyeon's mumble woke Taeyeon from her daze, and she looked around. The field looked miraculous when they were standing in it. The fog was thick enough for them to not even see the road they came from anymore.
"It's amazing." Tiffany's fear seemed to have vanished, and Taeyeon couldn't help but wonder... if it was because of her.
They walked slowly through the field, the cold of the mid-August night getting through their thin jackets. Sooyoung and Hyoyeon wandered off by themselves again, and as much as Taeyeon dreaded being alone with Tiffany, she didn't want to bother them. She could imagine how that would feel.
And when Tiffany started talking to her again, she could feel her senses start to give up their Tiffany-resistance.
Everytime Tiffany said something, she could feel herself responding like she always used to. Laugh with her. Hold their eye contact as long as she dared.
Those eyes were gonna be the death of her.
She looked for her self-control. It wasn't long before she found that she had none.
Suddenly, they noticed a hill, right in front of them. It was high enough to disappear into the fog around them, they didn't see the end of it.
"Let's get up there! Can you imagine what the view would be like from up there?" Tiffany's excitement felt adoreable to Taeyeon, but she restrained herself. For once.
She looked over towards Sooyoung and Hyoyeon. They were disappearing into the fog... Taeyeon squinted... and they were holding hands.
"It looks pretty slippery to me." She let her foot slide over the wet grass to prove her point.
Tiffany shook her head.
"Doesn't matter. We are going up there."
And Taeyeon found herself being dragged up the hill in the pale darkness.
And Tiffany was holding her hand again.
Not surprisingly, Tiffany was right about the view.
It was incredible.
The fullmoon was just about opposite of them, like a natural search light, and Taeyeon felt strong. The moment Tiffany had touched her hand, she had given up all attempts to keep her at a distance.
It was impossible.
Epescially since, in the moonlight, Tiffany looked more perfect than ever.
"Are you freezing?"
Tiffany looked at her and shook her head.
"No."
"You're shaking."
Tiffany looked down at her crossed arms and smiled awkwardly.
"Yeah, well, okay."
And Taeyeon laughed.
"Here, you can have my jacket." She pulled it off her arms and felt the midnight cold on her skin. Hiding her shivers, she handed the jacket to Tiffany.
"Aww, Taetae, you're so cheesy." She let Taeyeon help her put it on.
"Don't forget 'manly'."
Tiffany held out her hands, and the saw the sleeves of the jacket end several centimeters too far up on Tiffany's wrists.
"It's a little small..." Taeyeon tilted her head.
"No. It's perfect."
Tiffany's words sounded so honest it made Taeyeon whimper.
She forced herself to look away from the angel beside her and tried to take in the fogged view below.
It was perfect.
Like a scene from a movie, she thought. A place you can't find in real life.
And standing there with a person that's too good to be found in real life too...
"Now you're freezing."
The fact that Tiffany's voice was filled with worry made Taeyeon smile.
"No."
Lie.
"You're shaking."
Damn.
Suddenly she felt Tiffany's arms encircle her from behind. Her hands slid slowly over the side of Taeyeon's stomach before they met over her bellybutton. She pressed their bodies closely together, leaning her head on Taeyeon's shoulder,
and Taeyeon lost her mind.
She leaned back into the embrace and she wasn't sure she really existed. The warmth of Tiffany's body next to hers surrounded her, comforted her, took her over.
She leaned her head back on Tiffany's shoulder and closed her eyes.
That was how she wanted to live her life.
Forever, in Tiffany's embrace. That was all she needed.
Knowing that that was was she needed to feel complete, knowing that that was everything she'd dreamed of...
and knowing that it was the one thing she couldn't have.
And in that moment, she wished she'd care enough about her future pain to break free. But she couldn't. Tiffany's arms around her waist... Tiffany's breath on her neck made her lose the ability to think clearly.
So in that moment, she could pretend. She could forget. And she was okay.
They stood in silence, completely still, watching the fog creeping over the grass.
Taeyeon turned her head and looked to the right, where she had seen Hyoyeon and Sooyoung disappear 20 minutes earlier.
She was not very surprised to see them standing closely together, their lips locked in a careful first kiss.
"Look" she whispered.
Tiffany followed her gaze and gasped a little when she saw them.
"Oh my."
"Agreed."
"That's... pretty unexpected." Taeyeon raised an eyebrow.
"Not really."
"No?" Tiffany giggled.
"No... Did you not see the way they were with each other in there?"
Tiffany carefully shook her hair out of her eyes. It hit Taeyeon's cheek and she felt the smell of melon again.
"No, I didn't. And since when can you take hints?"
"What do you mean?" Taeyeon was confused. "Since always."
"Oh yeah? Is that why for four years you never realized I was in love with you?"
With all her willpower, Taeyeon broke loose from Tiffany's embrace.
"What?"
And Tiffany looked away.
"Yeah..."
Taeyeon's naive shock went through her like electricity.
"And you never told me?"
"No."
"Why?"
A thoughtful silence.
"If I had an answer, Taetae, I would tell you."
Taeyeon made an effort to understand, as silence fell again. She took Tiffany's hand and just stood by her side. The knowledge that Tiffany had been in love with her all this time gave her a mixture of guilt and happiness.
A want to make it up to her.
But most of all, confusion about why Tiffany didn't want to accept the person she apparently had loved for four years.
"Have you ever dreamt of running through a foggy field in the middle of the night?"
Taeyeon laughed.
"No, I can't say that I have."
"Well, okay, me neither, but let's pretend that we have."
"Why?"
And Tiffany held Taeyeon's hand tight and ran through the wet grass down the hill.
Taeyeon screamed as they rushed through the cold midnight air. Tiffany was pulling her forward faster, faster, and faster, and Taeyeon couldn't help but laugh as she desperately tried to keep control over her feet. She half screamed, half laughed, until she saw Hyoyeon and Sooyoung walking in front of them, hand in hand.
They turned around when they heard Taeyeon's screams and hastily let go of each other's hands.
Tiffany and Taeyeon came to a halt right in front of them, and both bent down to regain their breath.
"You're insane."
"I know."
"Well, thanks for almost killing me."
"You're welcome."
Taeyeon looked up and saw Sooyoung and Hyoyeon exchange a glance. A look she translated as a look of relief that they weren't discovered.
For the first time, Taeyeon wished Sooyoung knew about her and Tiffany. She understood how she must be feeling...
Oh, Sooyoung.
They walked back home and nobody held hands.
The rest of the evening was unsurprising in an unexpected way for Taeyeon.
Sooyoung was trying to hide her feelings for Hyoyeon from Tiffany and Taeyeon, and Taeyeon felt sorry for her. She wanted to tell her that it was okay, but she also wanted Sooyoung to tell her out of trust... and not because Taeyeon had been... spying on them.
The best moment of the rest of the night, for Taeyeon, was when they made the sleeping arrangement.
They had Sooyoung's bed and one lonely mattress.
"Well, I guess I should... sleep with... I mean next to you, since I'm thinking Taeyeon and Tiffany won't want a stranger beside them while they're sleeping."
"I think you're right" Sooyoung answered without so much as looking at Taeyeon.
Oh, Sooyoung.
But she didn't mind. It meant she would have the whole night beside Tiffany.
She waited until 3 in the morning before she said anything. Both Hyoyeon and Sooyoung were snoring loudly up in the bed.
Taeyeon sat up a little and looked at them.
They were completely tangled up in each other. Taeyeon guessed that when they could use sleep as a cover-up, they didn't care enough to try and hide it.
She was happy for them.
Tiffany turned towards her, eyes open, seemingly fully awake.
"You're awake."
Tiffany nodded.
"So are you."
"Well, like I could sleep beside you."
"Why not?"
Taeyeon thought.
"Why would I want to? It would... seem like such a waste."
Tiffany smiled. Oh, that smile...
"You're sweet."
"I know."
Tiffany laughed. Oh, that laugh...
Taeyeon felt Tiffany pull her close. She put her hand on Tiffany's waist, slowly caressing the skin over her ribs. Tiffany's hand was on her back, pulling her that impossible inch closer.
"I'm glad you were there with me tonight. Under the moon."
Warm whispers, heating up Taeyeon's cold hands.
"I am too."
"Do you think you're gonna be able to sleep?" Tiffany stroked her face.
"Maybe. A little." Taeyeon had to admit she wasn't tired at all. She couldn't be.
Tiffany nodded.
"You are so beautiful."
The whisper was more silent and so fragile, but it shook Taeyeon's spine. The physical thing called love swelled up so horrifyingly enormous that tears welled up in her eyes. She didn't know what to answer.
"You're one to talk."
They spent the remaining night swimming in and out of consciousness.
Taeyeon would fall asleep, wake up half an hour later and find Tiffany awake, looking at her. Seeing her smile as she saw Taeyeon's sleepy eyes try to focus on her.
She'd fall asleep again and wake up ten minutes later, to see Tiffany sleeping beside her, her eyelids heavy, breathing deeply and softly, her hand locked with Taeyeon's.
Eventually, they fell asleep from their dream and slept for the two hours they had left before Sooyoung and Hyoyeon started waking up.
They shot glances at each other over the breakfast table. Too busy thinking to even notice Sooyoung and Hyoyeon's excessive flirting.
This was the point when Taeyeon knew she should be devastated. She knew nothing had really changed - they had been so close, but they hadn't even kissed. She knew that if Tiffany had changed her mind, she would have shown it to her, somehow.
But they were exchanging looks over the breakfast table... She had never lived that before.
It must have meant something.
The night had been the best night of her life, but that was it.
It was morning, the sun was up, and it had ended.
She should be petrified.
But she couldn't help it. Tiffany had given her a small sliver of hope.
And she knew yet again, something was going to happen.
Part 3~
Pairing: TaeNy ~ guest spot by Hyoyoung
Rating: G
Genre: Romance/Drama/Fluff
Summary: Falling in love with your best friend isn't easy, and though Taeyeon thinks she knows everything about Tiffany, it turns out she might be wrong.
Wordcount: 3,071
Part 1~
It was supposed to have been their last night. Taeyeon felt it when she left Tiffany the next morning. The long goodbye, that was intimate yet carefully kept behind the lines of friendship.
She had expected Tiffany, like herself, would want to want to be left alone, but to her surprise, Tiffany kept texting her.
Everyday.
And everytime Taeyeon read those texts, that physical thing called love wrenched in her stomach.
She didn't know what to make of it. She didn't know that a simple "hi, how are you today?" could make you so unbelievably confused.
If she didn't want Taeyeon's love, then what was she after? Was it to taunt Taeyeon, or did she simply not know how to stay away from her?
Taeyeon didn't understand, and she wasn't sure she wanted to, either. Mostly she ignored the texts, and she knew Tiffany understood that.
But sometimes she answered, too. And everything was like before.
Despite feeling so confused, the expected awkwardness never arrived. But Taeyeon chose to not get too close with Tiffany again. If it was gonna end, it might aswell just end fast. With as little pain as possible.
She was doing good with moving on and ignoring, until the one day when Tiffany called her. It was the first time they had spoken since their "last" night... and Taeyeon was terrified when she answered.
"Hello?"
"Hi, it's Tiffany." Yeah, but why?
"Oh. Hi."
Silence. Was that all?
"...hello?"
"Yes, I'm sorry." Tiffany giggled at herself. "I was just, um, calling to... say that Sooyoung invited me over to her place this Friday."
What was that?
"What?"
"Yeah, uhm, I mean, she wants you and me to come over."
"Why?" Taeyeon hadn't actually told Sooyoung what had happened inside of her. And she wasn't planning to. The less reminders she got of it, the better.
"I don't know." She was sad to hear that Tiffany sounded like... a colleague you don't really like, but have to do assignments with. "Apparently some friend of hers is coming there and she wants us to meet her."
"Who?"
"I don't know, some girl from town."
"Okay."
Silence again.
"So, will you be there?" Tiffany's question broke her out of her wonderings.
"Uh... yeah, I-I guess so" Taeyeon said. She tried to be a little less than nice to Tiffany without being an outright idiot.
"Okay."
Silence.
"I'll... I'll see you, then."
"Yeah. Bye."
When the call ended, Taeyeon cried because she had never treated Tiffany in any other way than a princess before.
And talking to her like someone who didn't matter was breaking her heart.
Tiffany deserved more.
Deep breaths.
It was close to midnight, and the evening had so far been alright.
Almost okay.
In fact, in almost every way, it was a really great night. She could even look at Tiffany sometimes and forget that... their time together had to end. She had to remind herself to not laugh too hard at her jokes. Not sit too close to her. Not talk to her as much as usual.
And she had come to find, it was one of the hardest things she had ever had to do.
They were sitting on the floor in Sooyoung's room, drinking coca cola out of wine glasses. Sooyoung had always told her that drinking out of wine glasses made her feel like a grown-up, no matter what beverage.
Taeyeon used to always laugh when she thought of it.
Some weird, dark, heavy music was playing in the barely lit room. Taeyeon had no memory of Sooyoung ever liking that kind of music, but then again, she could see that her new friend, Hyoyeon, thoroughly enjoyed it...
Tiffany, on the other hand, looked outright scared.
And Taeyeon had to admit, she was a little uncomfortable. Sooyoung's house lay in the forest, in the middle of nowhere. The man on the CD's raspy voice mixed with the shadows from the trees outside and the smell of incense made a rather unfriendly blend.
"Wow, it's hot in here." Everyone's eyes turned to Hyoyeon.
"Kinda."
And Taeyeon saw how Sooyoung was looking at the older girl.
"Let's go outside."
Tiffany looked like she was about to panic at the suggestion.
"Really? S-Should we really?"
"Yeah! Why not?"
"I mean it's just... so... so late." Tiffany looked at the clock on the wall. Her terrified expression made Taeyeon want to take her in her arms and protect her from all the things that she didn't need to be protected from. The shadows. The darkness.
But she chose to protect herself.
And Sooyoung seemed very set on going outside.
"Yeah, but look at the fog!"
They all got up on their knees and looked out the window. Fullmoon and fog over a meadow - it looked just about surreal.
"Wow..."
"My thoughts exactly. So let's go!"
Hyoyeon and Sooyoung ran for the door.
Taeyeon rose from the silence and looked back at the girl on the floor. Tiffany reluctantly started to get up to follow the others...
And Taeyeon was careful not to reach out her hand to help her up.
As soon as they walked out the door, Taeyeon faced her first big problem in her plan to move on:
Frogs.
Frogs, everywhere.
She screamed.
And Sooyoung and Tiffany laughed, while Hyoyeon looked confused.
"She hates frogs." Sooyoung was fast to answer first.
"We can't walk like this! I can't do it!"
"Why not?" Tiffany looked at her, amused.
"It's gross."
Tiffany walked up to her and turned her back to her.
"Well then jump on."
"What?"
Hyoyeon and Sooyoung looked at them.
"Jump on my back!"
"Why?"
"So you don't have to walk with the frogs?"
Something inside Taeyeon ticked and exploded peacefully. She had to think up a reason to not...
"I'm way too heavy." She laughed awkwardly and wanted to smack herself.
"Don't be an idiot, shorty."
"Hey!" Taeyeon slapped her on the arm, before realising what she was doing.
Being... normal... with Tiffany. Just what she wasn't supposed to do. She cursed Sooyoung for inviting them both there that night.
"Come on, now, jump on!" Tiffany nudged her.
"Yes, come on, Tae, get a move on." Taeyeon glared at Sooyoung.
"Fine." She gave up.
She grabbed Tiffany's arms and jumped as high as she could. Tiffany caught her, stumbled a few steps, and eventually steadied.
Her hair smelled like melon.
Taeyeon tried to restrain herself, but being so close to Tiffany made all the love she felt for her ache inside her. Just like she feared it would.
She put her arms around Tiffany's neck and tried to not fall off as they started walking down the road.
The fullmoon was the only thing that gave light to their scene. It was dead silent, aside from the distant breeze in the trees on the left side of the road.
Tiffany stumbled with a squealing Taeyeon on her back, with Hyoyeon and Sooyoung wandering behind them, deep in conversation.
Taeyeon dared to sneak a look back at them, and more heard than saw Sooyoung laugh loudly at one of Hyoyeon's jokes.
She nodded to herself, half in surprise, half in a amusement.
Oh, Sooyoung.
She jumped off Tiffany's back on the field.
"There! Free from the frogs."
Taeyeon nodded. She didn't want to say anything. The cheeriness in Tiffany's voice made her want to scream with guilt.
Sooyoung and Hyoyeon caught up to them and Taeyeon was saved.
"Wow..."
Hyoyeon's mumble woke Taeyeon from her daze, and she looked around. The field looked miraculous when they were standing in it. The fog was thick enough for them to not even see the road they came from anymore.
"It's amazing." Tiffany's fear seemed to have vanished, and Taeyeon couldn't help but wonder... if it was because of her.
They walked slowly through the field, the cold of the mid-August night getting through their thin jackets. Sooyoung and Hyoyeon wandered off by themselves again, and as much as Taeyeon dreaded being alone with Tiffany, she didn't want to bother them. She could imagine how that would feel.
And when Tiffany started talking to her again, she could feel her senses start to give up their Tiffany-resistance.
Everytime Tiffany said something, she could feel herself responding like she always used to. Laugh with her. Hold their eye contact as long as she dared.
Those eyes were gonna be the death of her.
She looked for her self-control. It wasn't long before she found that she had none.
Suddenly, they noticed a hill, right in front of them. It was high enough to disappear into the fog around them, they didn't see the end of it.
"Let's get up there! Can you imagine what the view would be like from up there?" Tiffany's excitement felt adoreable to Taeyeon, but she restrained herself. For once.
She looked over towards Sooyoung and Hyoyeon. They were disappearing into the fog... Taeyeon squinted... and they were holding hands.
"It looks pretty slippery to me." She let her foot slide over the wet grass to prove her point.
Tiffany shook her head.
"Doesn't matter. We are going up there."
And Taeyeon found herself being dragged up the hill in the pale darkness.
And Tiffany was holding her hand again.
Not surprisingly, Tiffany was right about the view.
It was incredible.
The fullmoon was just about opposite of them, like a natural search light, and Taeyeon felt strong. The moment Tiffany had touched her hand, she had given up all attempts to keep her at a distance.
It was impossible.
Epescially since, in the moonlight, Tiffany looked more perfect than ever.
"Are you freezing?"
Tiffany looked at her and shook her head.
"No."
"You're shaking."
Tiffany looked down at her crossed arms and smiled awkwardly.
"Yeah, well, okay."
And Taeyeon laughed.
"Here, you can have my jacket." She pulled it off her arms and felt the midnight cold on her skin. Hiding her shivers, she handed the jacket to Tiffany.
"Aww, Taetae, you're so cheesy." She let Taeyeon help her put it on.
"Don't forget 'manly'."
Tiffany held out her hands, and the saw the sleeves of the jacket end several centimeters too far up on Tiffany's wrists.
"It's a little small..." Taeyeon tilted her head.
"No. It's perfect."
Tiffany's words sounded so honest it made Taeyeon whimper.
She forced herself to look away from the angel beside her and tried to take in the fogged view below.
It was perfect.
Like a scene from a movie, she thought. A place you can't find in real life.
And standing there with a person that's too good to be found in real life too...
"Now you're freezing."
The fact that Tiffany's voice was filled with worry made Taeyeon smile.
"No."
Lie.
"You're shaking."
Damn.
Suddenly she felt Tiffany's arms encircle her from behind. Her hands slid slowly over the side of Taeyeon's stomach before they met over her bellybutton. She pressed their bodies closely together, leaning her head on Taeyeon's shoulder,
and Taeyeon lost her mind.
She leaned back into the embrace and she wasn't sure she really existed. The warmth of Tiffany's body next to hers surrounded her, comforted her, took her over.
She leaned her head back on Tiffany's shoulder and closed her eyes.
That was how she wanted to live her life.
Forever, in Tiffany's embrace. That was all she needed.
Knowing that that was was she needed to feel complete, knowing that that was everything she'd dreamed of...
and knowing that it was the one thing she couldn't have.
And in that moment, she wished she'd care enough about her future pain to break free. But she couldn't. Tiffany's arms around her waist... Tiffany's breath on her neck made her lose the ability to think clearly.
So in that moment, she could pretend. She could forget. And she was okay.
They stood in silence, completely still, watching the fog creeping over the grass.
Taeyeon turned her head and looked to the right, where she had seen Hyoyeon and Sooyoung disappear 20 minutes earlier.
She was not very surprised to see them standing closely together, their lips locked in a careful first kiss.
"Look" she whispered.
Tiffany followed her gaze and gasped a little when she saw them.
"Oh my."
"Agreed."
"That's... pretty unexpected." Taeyeon raised an eyebrow.
"Not really."
"No?" Tiffany giggled.
"No... Did you not see the way they were with each other in there?"
Tiffany carefully shook her hair out of her eyes. It hit Taeyeon's cheek and she felt the smell of melon again.
"No, I didn't. And since when can you take hints?"
"What do you mean?" Taeyeon was confused. "Since always."
"Oh yeah? Is that why for four years you never realized I was in love with you?"
With all her willpower, Taeyeon broke loose from Tiffany's embrace.
"What?"
And Tiffany looked away.
"Yeah..."
Taeyeon's naive shock went through her like electricity.
"And you never told me?"
"No."
"Why?"
A thoughtful silence.
"If I had an answer, Taetae, I would tell you."
Taeyeon made an effort to understand, as silence fell again. She took Tiffany's hand and just stood by her side. The knowledge that Tiffany had been in love with her all this time gave her a mixture of guilt and happiness.
A want to make it up to her.
But most of all, confusion about why Tiffany didn't want to accept the person she apparently had loved for four years.
"Have you ever dreamt of running through a foggy field in the middle of the night?"
Taeyeon laughed.
"No, I can't say that I have."
"Well, okay, me neither, but let's pretend that we have."
"Why?"
And Tiffany held Taeyeon's hand tight and ran through the wet grass down the hill.
Taeyeon screamed as they rushed through the cold midnight air. Tiffany was pulling her forward faster, faster, and faster, and Taeyeon couldn't help but laugh as she desperately tried to keep control over her feet. She half screamed, half laughed, until she saw Hyoyeon and Sooyoung walking in front of them, hand in hand.
They turned around when they heard Taeyeon's screams and hastily let go of each other's hands.
Tiffany and Taeyeon came to a halt right in front of them, and both bent down to regain their breath.
"You're insane."
"I know."
"Well, thanks for almost killing me."
"You're welcome."
Taeyeon looked up and saw Sooyoung and Hyoyeon exchange a glance. A look she translated as a look of relief that they weren't discovered.
For the first time, Taeyeon wished Sooyoung knew about her and Tiffany. She understood how she must be feeling...
Oh, Sooyoung.
They walked back home and nobody held hands.
The rest of the evening was unsurprising in an unexpected way for Taeyeon.
Sooyoung was trying to hide her feelings for Hyoyeon from Tiffany and Taeyeon, and Taeyeon felt sorry for her. She wanted to tell her that it was okay, but she also wanted Sooyoung to tell her out of trust... and not because Taeyeon had been... spying on them.
The best moment of the rest of the night, for Taeyeon, was when they made the sleeping arrangement.
They had Sooyoung's bed and one lonely mattress.
"Well, I guess I should... sleep with... I mean next to you, since I'm thinking Taeyeon and Tiffany won't want a stranger beside them while they're sleeping."
"I think you're right" Sooyoung answered without so much as looking at Taeyeon.
Oh, Sooyoung.
But she didn't mind. It meant she would have the whole night beside Tiffany.
She waited until 3 in the morning before she said anything. Both Hyoyeon and Sooyoung were snoring loudly up in the bed.
Taeyeon sat up a little and looked at them.
They were completely tangled up in each other. Taeyeon guessed that when they could use sleep as a cover-up, they didn't care enough to try and hide it.
She was happy for them.
Tiffany turned towards her, eyes open, seemingly fully awake.
"You're awake."
Tiffany nodded.
"So are you."
"Well, like I could sleep beside you."
"Why not?"
Taeyeon thought.
"Why would I want to? It would... seem like such a waste."
Tiffany smiled. Oh, that smile...
"You're sweet."
"I know."
Tiffany laughed. Oh, that laugh...
Taeyeon felt Tiffany pull her close. She put her hand on Tiffany's waist, slowly caressing the skin over her ribs. Tiffany's hand was on her back, pulling her that impossible inch closer.
"I'm glad you were there with me tonight. Under the moon."
Warm whispers, heating up Taeyeon's cold hands.
"I am too."
"Do you think you're gonna be able to sleep?" Tiffany stroked her face.
"Maybe. A little." Taeyeon had to admit she wasn't tired at all. She couldn't be.
Tiffany nodded.
"You are so beautiful."
The whisper was more silent and so fragile, but it shook Taeyeon's spine. The physical thing called love swelled up so horrifyingly enormous that tears welled up in her eyes. She didn't know what to answer.
"You're one to talk."
They spent the remaining night swimming in and out of consciousness.
Taeyeon would fall asleep, wake up half an hour later and find Tiffany awake, looking at her. Seeing her smile as she saw Taeyeon's sleepy eyes try to focus on her.
She'd fall asleep again and wake up ten minutes later, to see Tiffany sleeping beside her, her eyelids heavy, breathing deeply and softly, her hand locked with Taeyeon's.
Eventually, they fell asleep from their dream and slept for the two hours they had left before Sooyoung and Hyoyeon started waking up.
They shot glances at each other over the breakfast table. Too busy thinking to even notice Sooyoung and Hyoyeon's excessive flirting.
This was the point when Taeyeon knew she should be devastated. She knew nothing had really changed - they had been so close, but they hadn't even kissed. She knew that if Tiffany had changed her mind, she would have shown it to her, somehow.
But they were exchanging looks over the breakfast table... She had never lived that before.
It must have meant something.
The night had been the best night of her life, but that was it.
It was morning, the sun was up, and it had ended.
She should be petrified.
But she couldn't help it. Tiffany had given her a small sliver of hope.
And she knew yet again, something was going to happen.
Part 3~