posted from aim, so that others can get an idea of what's going on
(7:12:24 PM) swordianmaster: I feel like everything's falling apart. Again.
(7:13:28 PM) swordianmaster: I'm still unemployed, my father-in-law - who, through the fact he gets SSI and the fact that DeAnna is on payroll as HIS CARETAKER, is our only source of income - is in the hospital getting abnormal CAT readings and with blood being found in his stomach
(7:13:59 PM) swordianmaster: Even WITH the money we're bringing in, it's going to be a small miracle if we can manage to pay electric and phone bills both this month
(7:14:44 PM) swordianmaster: We're gonna run out of food stamp money about two weeks before we get more - AS USUAL, we haven't had the chance to do laundry for over a month
(7:14:50 PM) swordianmaster: The cats have no fresh litter, no food - we've been feeding them bargain bin luncheon meat
(7:15:07 PM) swordianmaster: DeAnna's to the point where HER addiction is starting to put a strain on everything...
(7:15:21 PM) swordianmaster: Things were supposed to get better.
(7:15:23 PM) swordianmaster: This is not better.
(7:15:50 PM) swordianmaster: And I can't help but feel like the world is trying to pile the guilt onto me because I don't have any way of making money.
(7:16:20 PM) swordianmaster: What am I supposed to do? Resort to theft? Start killing people? Whoring myself out? (Hah, as if /that/ would work)
(7:16:54 PM) swordianmaster: I'm already basically a goddamn drug runner, enabling my fath-in-law to sell off his prescription meds just so we can GET BY.
(7:18:02 PM) swordianmaster: And the worst part is, /I'm/ not even the one getting the worst of the pressure, meaning I get to just sit and uselessly watch as this basically makes DeAnna fall apart.
(7:19:42 PM) swordianmaster: if we had any sort of safety net here i'd suggest that [bossgoji] come over this way should things go wrong with DeAnna's dad
(7:19:43 PM) swordianmaster: but
(7:19:45 PM) swordianmaster: we don't
(7:19:51 PM) swordianmaster: meaning if his body gives up on him
(7:19:59 PM) swordianmaster: that's it
(7:20:01 PM) swordianmaster: there's nothing else
(7:20:09 PM) swordianmaster: nothing to fall back on
(7:21:59 PM) swordianmaster: I just wish I knew what to do.
(7:22:13 PM) swordianmaster: It's real easy to say "you need to get a job", but... even if I did look harder than I have been
(7:22:19 PM) swordianmaster: Even if I got a job tomorrow
(7:22:40 PM) swordianmaster: bills are due in exactly one week, I don't know exactly how much we have that we're able to pay
(7:22:46 PM) swordianmaster: we may not have ANY money at ALL
(7:27:23 PM) swordianmaster: All the bridges are burned anyway. Both me and DeAnna have frozen paypal accounts because we owe them individually at least $100 each
(7:27:47 PM) swordianmaster: the reason we may not have ANY money is because both of us are individually in debt to Chase at least that much
(7:28:01 PM) swordianmaster: To say nothing of the child support that keeps getting leeched from DeAnna
(7:13:28 PM) swordianmaster: I'm still unemployed, my father-in-law - who, through the fact he gets SSI and the fact that DeAnna is on payroll as HIS CARETAKER, is our only source of income - is in the hospital getting abnormal CAT readings and with blood being found in his stomach
(7:13:59 PM) swordianmaster: Even WITH the money we're bringing in, it's going to be a small miracle if we can manage to pay electric and phone bills both this month
(7:14:44 PM) swordianmaster: We're gonna run out of food stamp money about two weeks before we get more - AS USUAL, we haven't had the chance to do laundry for over a month
(7:14:50 PM) swordianmaster: The cats have no fresh litter, no food - we've been feeding them bargain bin luncheon meat
(7:15:07 PM) swordianmaster: DeAnna's to the point where HER addiction is starting to put a strain on everything...
(7:15:21 PM) swordianmaster: Things were supposed to get better.
(7:15:23 PM) swordianmaster: This is not better.
(7:15:50 PM) swordianmaster: And I can't help but feel like the world is trying to pile the guilt onto me because I don't have any way of making money.
(7:16:20 PM) swordianmaster: What am I supposed to do? Resort to theft? Start killing people? Whoring myself out? (Hah, as if /that/ would work)
(7:16:54 PM) swordianmaster: I'm already basically a goddamn drug runner, enabling my fath-in-law to sell off his prescription meds just so we can GET BY.
(7:18:02 PM) swordianmaster: And the worst part is, /I'm/ not even the one getting the worst of the pressure, meaning I get to just sit and uselessly watch as this basically makes DeAnna fall apart.
(7:19:42 PM) swordianmaster: if we had any sort of safety net here i'd suggest that [bossgoji] come over this way should things go wrong with DeAnna's dad
(7:19:43 PM) swordianmaster: but
(7:19:45 PM) swordianmaster: we don't
(7:19:51 PM) swordianmaster: meaning if his body gives up on him
(7:19:59 PM) swordianmaster: that's it
(7:20:01 PM) swordianmaster: there's nothing else
(7:20:09 PM) swordianmaster: nothing to fall back on
(7:21:59 PM) swordianmaster: I just wish I knew what to do.
(7:22:13 PM) swordianmaster: It's real easy to say "you need to get a job", but... even if I did look harder than I have been
(7:22:19 PM) swordianmaster: Even if I got a job tomorrow
(7:22:40 PM) swordianmaster: bills are due in exactly one week, I don't know exactly how much we have that we're able to pay
(7:22:46 PM) swordianmaster: we may not have ANY money at ALL
(7:27:23 PM) swordianmaster: All the bridges are burned anyway. Both me and DeAnna have frozen paypal accounts because we owe them individually at least $100 each
(7:27:47 PM) swordianmaster: the reason we may not have ANY money is because both of us are individually in debt to Chase at least that much
(7:28:01 PM) swordianmaster: To say nothing of the child support that keeps getting leeched from DeAnna