Hm..
I have been doing alot of thinking recently. I miss having a girlfriend. I know it is almost physically impossible to accomplish that at a school like this where your entire life is dedicated to your grades and what your job will be after college but I miss it. It feels like I skipped out on a huge gap on my life...the life you see in movies where the kid is away from his parents, having fun with his new and old friends, meeting that special girl, enjoying teenage romance before they grow up and go into the real world. I'm already basically in the real world. I am already considered to be more mature and professional then other students my age in the world. This June I am going out for 100 days working on a shipping vessel with one other student and a real crew...it isn't some training vessel or anything its a real working ship in business. I'm starting to think if it was better to go to a year at a normal college before coming here. Alot of kids did that since the average age of the freshman here is about 19/20.
I am doing fine in the school academically though. I have like a 3.7 average which seems to be up there in perspective with the rest of my grade. I am handling all the events of the academy except for my own personal thoughts. I can be having a perfect day here then look online at pictures of my friends at a normal college enjoying themselves and damn does that hit me hard.
Back to the girl deal. I miss that feeling of loving somebody. The one girl that I did truely love in my lifetime is 4 hours away with a boyfriend that isn't going anywhere for a while. I've "hooked up" or whatever they call it these days with a couple of girls since I've been here and its fun and all I guess but I miss that mutual strong feeling that love had.
I don't know why I am writing this or if anybody is reading about this and actually cares about what goes through my head. It seems that when I put an hour putting my thoughts down and expect comments to see what other people think I get maybe one, but when i post a picture I receive about 29 comments.
gahhhh i think im done. ill try to write more later...
I am doing fine in the school academically though. I have like a 3.7 average which seems to be up there in perspective with the rest of my grade. I am handling all the events of the academy except for my own personal thoughts. I can be having a perfect day here then look online at pictures of my friends at a normal college enjoying themselves and damn does that hit me hard.
Back to the girl deal. I miss that feeling of loving somebody. The one girl that I did truely love in my lifetime is 4 hours away with a boyfriend that isn't going anywhere for a while. I've "hooked up" or whatever they call it these days with a couple of girls since I've been here and its fun and all I guess but I miss that mutual strong feeling that love had.
I don't know why I am writing this or if anybody is reading about this and actually cares about what goes through my head. It seems that when I put an hour putting my thoughts down and expect comments to see what other people think I get maybe one, but when i post a picture I receive about 29 comments.
gahhhh i think im done. ill try to write more later...