You have me in your pocket
Friday night I was originally going to do nothing but sit around and watch boys play zombie video games and listen to crazy music. Instead I went to a Future party at the last moment with Julian and Hope at Teresa's "Secstasy" boy's house. I wore my fruit leggings and fishnets under my mini skirt and was decked out in rainbows. I wore all of my bangles on one arm and glow sticks on the other. We had already smoked that evening and I wasn't really inclined to drink once we got to the party, as Teresa was already a shitshow and I didn't really know anybody. At some point Mike and I started talking and after a while I realized that we were hard-core getting into each other. He changed my mind and I wanted a beer but the keg was tapped so we smoked a lot in his tapestry covered room. We're both nerds, like hockey, like the same music, and love life. He has his dad's copies of Lord of the Rings from college and the Communist Manifesto in his room. We sat on his green velvet couch and received no less than two performances of pure narration from this free-styler Andy who was hyped up on Ketamine, complete with flowing rhymes and sound effects. Eventually most people trickled out, although quite a number remained to stay up all night tripping various substances. Mike and I played Dark Side of the Moon on vinyl and turned out the lights. He sleeps in a nook, on a memory foam mattress under a purple comforter. The sun came in bright in the morning. We ate Cosmos when he drove me home. Last night I went over to watch a movie and tonight he came over to do some homework. He's obsessed with my hair. He loves my green eyes that go blue to match my clothes. His mustache and beard are actually really soft and when I kiss him he tastes just perfectly of cigarette smoke. He tugs my bangs while I twist his dreads around my fingers and I smell like him. I still don't know how to respond when I'm complimented in intimate situations.
The only thing that could ruin this is that he broke up with his girlfriend of a year three weeks ago. I don't feel like a rebound, but there's no way of telling, especially when he said, "Keep in touch" when I walked him out tonight. But he doesn't think he's rebounding, so that's a good. I'm just doubting because that's how it has to be. And I've been avoiding Trevor unintentionally, but necessarily. Julian won't talk to me, and I'm sure its about me not leaving the party Friday night, but I didn't do anything wrong so I don't really care. Also, Scott Ryan was online tonight and didn't talk to me. But thank goodness Ryan is here to rub my neck and talk to me even though we are so weird and we don't know what to do.
The only thing that could ruin this is that he broke up with his girlfriend of a year three weeks ago. I don't feel like a rebound, but there's no way of telling, especially when he said, "Keep in touch" when I walked him out tonight. But he doesn't think he's rebounding, so that's a good. I'm just doubting because that's how it has to be. And I've been avoiding Trevor unintentionally, but necessarily. Julian won't talk to me, and I'm sure its about me not leaving the party Friday night, but I didn't do anything wrong so I don't really care. Also, Scott Ryan was online tonight and didn't talk to me. But thank goodness Ryan is here to rub my neck and talk to me even though we are so weird and we don't know what to do.