If you can't tell, I am REALLY upset right now!
What is it with people that call themselves Christians? I thought that Christianity was supposed to teach love tempered with mercy. I thought they were taught to accept everyone for who they are, whether they are wrong or right, and try to show them God's way. Then why is it that some people that call themselves Christians discriminate against people like me? You would think that they would be even nicer to you, trying to get you on there side. But no, all they do is yell at you and tell you that you are going to hell! They think we choose to be this way. No, we don't! I don't recall saying to myself, "You know what, I think I'll be gay! Yippee!!" For some reason, that doesn't seem very Christian to me! It wouldn't bother me so much if it were some random person, but this comes from my own family!! They don't even invite me to church anymore. I have become the outcast of the family. Just this morning, my parents and my two brothers went to church, leaving me at home. You would think they would be forcing me to church to try and changeme back or something stupid like that. But no. It's almost like they have given up on me. My own mother even says that I am not a Christian! Where does she get off saying that to me! How dare she sit there and determine my fate to utter damnation! It's really not fair! My parents just sit there and wonder why I "chose" to live this way. What the hell is that?!! I didn't choose this!! Some people have said that some of the bad things that happen to me happen because of my homosexuality. Like my being sick. Every winter I get sick really bad, but it get sworse every year. I can't help it. It starts out with runny nose and coughing. Then my body just shuts down and I can't function. Plus the fact that all last year, I was working on two shows at a time! Then one day, after a big musical number, I started coughing really bad. Blood started trickling down my chin as I ran for the dressing room. It was horrible! It got worse. I got over it but it took about six months to get over. I'm scared about what might happen next year. Some of my friends have asked me if there was a way to change, a way to be like all th eother straight guys out there, would I? Of course I would! I would in a heart-beat. Everything would be the way it's supposed to be. Why the hell did this happen to me?! I didn't ask for this! I wanted to be like everybody else!! But I'm not. Now I have to face all the stereo-types, all the discrimination, all the hate that comes from people that feel they have the answer. From people that feel they are Christian and I am not. Well fine, send me to hell!!! If heaven is full of people like that then I would rather be in hell with people like me!!!