cant sleep

[sweetsteppinchi]

My mind is going crazy... I dont think i am thinking stright. Old habbets are comming back.. I am doughting, I am sinning, I am losing my mind.. And I am scared and lost. All i am doing is hurtung my self more and more with old habets and I am setting myself in situactions that I should not be in, situactions that I know are wrong adn taht will hurt me.. I have become this mean person to other people..I am pushing away people who I love and love me and I am pushing away other things. I dont mean to but I am hurting people and im not doing anything about it.. I am not just huring others but also myself.. What is going on.. Where did I go. What hapened. Am I just having some weird mood swing.. Do i need sleep or something to eat.. I dont know. All I do know is that everything is weird..Everything is getting taken away from me. Everyone Is leaving me. Or am I leaving them? I dont know.
For those who know what I am talking about, I really wish things were the way they were b4. I am just sacred to get hurt I am trying to pertect myself from getting hurt when I am allowing other to hurt me.I cant explain it but I get itso.. w/e.

What I am learning:
Its sad how losing something you love can change someone so mutch.

So once again, I'll feel my heart break
Over something that was only in my head….
But don't forget, I meant every word
I should have left unsaid

I'm not afraid of what I feel
I’m afraid of what you don’t...

Don't give up if you still wanna try
Don't wipe your eyes if you still wanna cry
Don't stop asking questions if you still wanna know
Don't say you don't love him if you can't let him go

<3 Sar.Bar