Finally
For the past like 3 weeks the only people I have seen and/or talked to was my swimteam and my family. I think its official now to say that I have no friends. Yep, regina, its just you and me now. I don't really care.... I don't care about anything anymore, I don't care about going back to school, I don't care about swim team, and I definitely don't care about anyone’s including my own feelings. You could walk up to me with a shovel and smack me in the face with it and I wouldn't do anything. I think I lost all my emotions. I can be really cruel and I don’t care. I made my sister cry and my mom cry, and I really don’t care. I’m just a worthless piece of shit and waste of space, and I’m serious. Last night I got organized about my death.
I already know where, how, and when I’m going to kill myself. And I’m going to too. People think I can’t and that I am afraid to, but 5 is a charm right? That’s what old people say. I’m not afraid, HELL I have nothing to lose, plus I already tried 4 times and there is no way someone’s going to stop me…again. I might do it tomorrow or I might do it when I have gray hair, but I’m never going to tell. There are only 3 things that will make me not kill myself and one of them is if I’m already dead and the other 2 I’m never going to tell. But that’s ok, right regina? WE already know.
Last night I closed my eyes, saw a flash of bright light and it burned, then I moved something, w/ out touching it…
~~Your Little Doormat~~
I already know where, how, and when I’m going to kill myself. And I’m going to too. People think I can’t and that I am afraid to, but 5 is a charm right? That’s what old people say. I’m not afraid, HELL I have nothing to lose, plus I already tried 4 times and there is no way someone’s going to stop me…again. I might do it tomorrow or I might do it when I have gray hair, but I’m never going to tell. There are only 3 things that will make me not kill myself and one of them is if I’m already dead and the other 2 I’m never going to tell. But that’s ok, right regina? WE already know.
Last night I closed my eyes, saw a flash of bright light and it burned, then I moved something, w/ out touching it…
~~Your Little Doormat~~