Thinking About My Slavery
I have been doing alot of thinking on my slavery tonight and how it affects me. I feel that most of my resistance is due to fear on my part. So much of the emotion is from past issues. The feelings that stirs up in me. The way I get turned on by sadistic fantasies. I am totally a masochist and have always wanted to be whipped and tortured while I struggle helplessly. Yet, I fear it at the same time. Society plays a part in that. Since they teach us to deny our most basic fantasies and needs. It was only when my Master tied me to the bed and whipped me mercilessly did I hit the highest sub space and walked around 3 days in a daze. And OMG those eyes: Like Ice on Fire. I am sure that most of us have heard about eyes like that. But until you actually see them you can not imagine the beauty and fright that it can conjure up. You can not look at them and yet you would rather face Hell then to look at them either. Can anyone understand what I am feeling?