Lots O' Stuff
10 EMOTIONS
1. are you missing someone right now? Nope. I'm missing some lot of people.
2. are you happy? Sure.
3. are you talking to anyone right now? Um, I was just talking to my sister, but at this very moment, no. I'm typing.
4. are you bored? Nope. I was doing something before this and right after this I'll have a lot of other stuff to do.
5. are you German? Yup. About half of me.
6. are you Japanese? Nope.
7. are you French? Nope.
8. are you Italian?: I might be a little, but exobably not.
9. are your parents still married?: Yup.
10. do you like someone right now? Wouldn't you like to know!
TEN FAVORITES
1. televison show: LOST and Whose Line.
2. flower: Roses and orchids.
3. color: Sage green and sky blue.
4. sport: Equestrian.
5. mall: None. Go online shopping!
6. band: The Beatles.
7. day of the week: Sunday.
8. season: Spring. Fall is pretty cool too, though.
9. animal: Horse. Big surprise, eh?
10. state: Hawaii would be but I've never been there so I don't think I can judge for myself just yet. So for now it's California. Though, I think the east coast states would be pretty awesome too.
TEN FACTS
1. hair color: Red.
2. age: 21
3. siblings: Two younger sisters.
4. hair style: Layered, from cheek bones to shoulders. I usually straighten it but when I don't it's pretty wavy/curly.
5. eye color: Medium brown/green (or dark hazel)
6. shoe size: 8-8 1/2
7. height: 5'6"
8. skin color: Fair/pastey McWhiteness, though I tan easily.
9. available: Meh, I'm enjoying being single right now. Technically available, but not emotionally.
10. lefty/righty: Both, left dominant but I write with my right hand.
TEN THINGS ABOUT YOUR LOVE LIFE
1. have you ever been in love?: Yup.
2. do you believe in love?: Of course!
3. why did your last relationship fail?: Kind of a long story that I don't wish to retell at this moment.
4. have you ever been heartbroken?: Yup.
5. have you ever broken someone's heart?: Unfortunately, yes.
6. Have you ever fallen for one of your best friends?: Hm... yeah.
7. have any of your best friends ever fallen for you?: Actually, yes, and we ended up dating, though only for five days, lol.
8. are you afraid of commitment?: At this moment, sort of. I want to get my career underway first. Then I can think about the committed stuff.
9. has someone ever kissed your hand?: Yup.
10. have you ever had a secret admirer?: Not that I know of.
TEN THINGS THIS OR THAT
1. love or lust: Love.
2. hard liquor or beer: Actually, beer. You can drink more without it affecting you as much, lol.
3. night or day: Both. I enjoy a good sunrise though watching the stars is mesmorizing.
4. one night stands or relationships: Relationships, definitely.
5. television or internet: Internet. It's considerably more interactive.
6. pepsi or coke: Coke or Diet Pepsi.
7. Disneyland or Six Flags: Disneyland! Though I do love Six Flags.
8. money or family: If it really came down to it, family. Though my family's much better off than I am at the moment. Money is rather tempting.
9. phone or in person: In person. Phones scare me.
10. msn or myspace: LiveJournal! Okay, okay, if I had to choose between the two, Myspace.
TEN HAVE Y0U EVER
1. have you ever been caught sneaking out?: Nope.
2. have you ever skinny dipped?: Actually, yeah, but I was a baby/little kid.
3. have you ever done something you regret?: Nope. Things happen for a reason. I wouldn't exchange the lessons I've learned.
4. have you ever bungee jumped?: No, but it sounds like wicked fun!
5. have you ever been on a house boat?: Nope.
6. Have you ever finished an entire jaw breaker?: Yup.
7. have you ever wanted someone so badly it hurt?: Yup, though that was many moons ago. People aren't worth so much emotional pain.
8. have you ever killed a man?: Um... through video games or RPing, yes. In real life, of course. Not.
9. have you ever danced in the rain?: Yup.
10. kissed someone in the rain?: Nope.
I realized something about myself recently. You know those moments of self discovery when things just suddenly click or make sense?
I always thought I was a very emotional person. I threw a lot of temper tantrums when I was little and really wore my heart on my sleeve when I was a teenager. I've since grown out of those things but I also tend to get angry with people very quickly. Again, I've been learning to deal with that as well, seeking to discuss things before blowing a fuse. It's part of the reason why I dyed my hair red. "Firey redhead" suits me so much better than "boring brunette".
Still, my emotional outbursts have mostly been in anger. My days of getting overly excited or upset or obsessive were mostly in my teen years and I haven't seen much of them lately. My job as of late has been being strong for other people, mostly my family. I've discovered that I've had to ignore my own emotions to help support those around me instead. In fact, I may need to start looking for things to help me start opening up again.
Pastor Andy asked me how I was feeling about my parents' current situation (a whole other fun story in itself) and I was very reluctant to answer. In the end I just told him that I'm fine and I'm mostly just concentrating on helping my mom through this. Though I don't think I'm fine.
Anything that's happened recently that you'd think would garner some emotion from me just... didn't. I haven't cried at church in... probably over a year. Watching certain movies used to make me into a crybaby but I can't remember the last time a movie's made me emotional other than just flat out enjoying it. I don't get as excited and obsessive of things as I used to. If I have any secrets that I'm very emotionally attached to I'm much more reluctant to tell people about them than I used to be. Heck, I didn't tell anyone about me and Joseph breaking up until about a week later. And then it was only Karra (tolerin), Pastor Pete and Seth (rlongbottom). I haven't even told my family yet because I just don't want people asking questions and prying. And heck, I think this is my first time announcing it openly to my flist.
Actually, I think I'm just learning to enjoy life more. Have more fun and not get so worked up about things. I've also done a TON of emotional, mental, and spiritual growing in the past year... especially learning to just be strong and work through things without falling to pieces. I just think I've gone a bit too far and started becoming really closed. Gosh darn it! I need to find a good medium, lol.
BTW: I'll be in LA through Sunday so church people, don't expect to see me at church. I'll be doing interviews and auditions and if I get callbacks that's what I'll be doing Sunday. Sunday, Sunday, Someday!
1. are you missing someone right now? Nope. I'm missing some lot of people.
2. are you happy? Sure.
3. are you talking to anyone right now? Um, I was just talking to my sister, but at this very moment, no. I'm typing.
4. are you bored? Nope. I was doing something before this and right after this I'll have a lot of other stuff to do.
5. are you German? Yup. About half of me.
6. are you Japanese? Nope.
7. are you French? Nope.
8. are you Italian?: I might be a little, but exobably not.
9. are your parents still married?: Yup.
10. do you like someone right now? Wouldn't you like to know!
TEN FAVORITES
1. televison show: LOST and Whose Line.
2. flower: Roses and orchids.
3. color: Sage green and sky blue.
4. sport: Equestrian.
5. mall: None. Go online shopping!
6. band: The Beatles.
7. day of the week: Sunday.
8. season: Spring. Fall is pretty cool too, though.
9. animal: Horse. Big surprise, eh?
10. state: Hawaii would be but I've never been there so I don't think I can judge for myself just yet. So for now it's California. Though, I think the east coast states would be pretty awesome too.
TEN FACTS
1. hair color: Red.
2. age: 21
3. siblings: Two younger sisters.
4. hair style: Layered, from cheek bones to shoulders. I usually straighten it but when I don't it's pretty wavy/curly.
5. eye color: Medium brown/green (or dark hazel)
6. shoe size: 8-8 1/2
7. height: 5'6"
8. skin color: Fair/pastey McWhiteness, though I tan easily.
9. available: Meh, I'm enjoying being single right now. Technically available, but not emotionally.
10. lefty/righty: Both, left dominant but I write with my right hand.
TEN THINGS ABOUT YOUR LOVE LIFE
1. have you ever been in love?: Yup.
2. do you believe in love?: Of course!
3. why did your last relationship fail?: Kind of a long story that I don't wish to retell at this moment.
4. have you ever been heartbroken?: Yup.
5. have you ever broken someone's heart?: Unfortunately, yes.
6. Have you ever fallen for one of your best friends?: Hm... yeah.
7. have any of your best friends ever fallen for you?: Actually, yes, and we ended up dating, though only for five days, lol.
8. are you afraid of commitment?: At this moment, sort of. I want to get my career underway first. Then I can think about the committed stuff.
9. has someone ever kissed your hand?: Yup.
10. have you ever had a secret admirer?: Not that I know of.
TEN THINGS THIS OR THAT
1. love or lust: Love.
2. hard liquor or beer: Actually, beer. You can drink more without it affecting you as much, lol.
3. night or day: Both. I enjoy a good sunrise though watching the stars is mesmorizing.
4. one night stands or relationships: Relationships, definitely.
5. television or internet: Internet. It's considerably more interactive.
6. pepsi or coke: Coke or Diet Pepsi.
7. Disneyland or Six Flags: Disneyland! Though I do love Six Flags.
8. money or family: If it really came down to it, family. Though my family's much better off than I am at the moment. Money is rather tempting.
9. phone or in person: In person. Phones scare me.
10. msn or myspace: LiveJournal! Okay, okay, if I had to choose between the two, Myspace.
TEN HAVE Y0U EVER
1. have you ever been caught sneaking out?: Nope.
2. have you ever skinny dipped?: Actually, yeah, but I was a baby/little kid.
3. have you ever done something you regret?: Nope. Things happen for a reason. I wouldn't exchange the lessons I've learned.
4. have you ever bungee jumped?: No, but it sounds like wicked fun!
5. have you ever been on a house boat?: Nope.
6. Have you ever finished an entire jaw breaker?: Yup.
7. have you ever wanted someone so badly it hurt?: Yup, though that was many moons ago. People aren't worth so much emotional pain.
8. have you ever killed a man?: Um... through video games or RPing, yes. In real life, of course. Not.
9. have you ever danced in the rain?: Yup.
10. kissed someone in the rain?: Nope.
I realized something about myself recently. You know those moments of self discovery when things just suddenly click or make sense?
I always thought I was a very emotional person. I threw a lot of temper tantrums when I was little and really wore my heart on my sleeve when I was a teenager. I've since grown out of those things but I also tend to get angry with people very quickly. Again, I've been learning to deal with that as well, seeking to discuss things before blowing a fuse. It's part of the reason why I dyed my hair red. "Firey redhead" suits me so much better than "boring brunette".
Still, my emotional outbursts have mostly been in anger. My days of getting overly excited or upset or obsessive were mostly in my teen years and I haven't seen much of them lately. My job as of late has been being strong for other people, mostly my family. I've discovered that I've had to ignore my own emotions to help support those around me instead. In fact, I may need to start looking for things to help me start opening up again.
Pastor Andy asked me how I was feeling about my parents' current situation (a whole other fun story in itself) and I was very reluctant to answer. In the end I just told him that I'm fine and I'm mostly just concentrating on helping my mom through this. Though I don't think I'm fine.
Anything that's happened recently that you'd think would garner some emotion from me just... didn't. I haven't cried at church in... probably over a year. Watching certain movies used to make me into a crybaby but I can't remember the last time a movie's made me emotional other than just flat out enjoying it. I don't get as excited and obsessive of things as I used to. If I have any secrets that I'm very emotionally attached to I'm much more reluctant to tell people about them than I used to be. Heck, I didn't tell anyone about me and Joseph breaking up until about a week later. And then it was only Karra (tolerin), Pastor Pete and Seth (rlongbottom). I haven't even told my family yet because I just don't want people asking questions and prying. And heck, I think this is my first time announcing it openly to my flist.
Actually, I think I'm just learning to enjoy life more. Have more fun and not get so worked up about things. I've also done a TON of emotional, mental, and spiritual growing in the past year... especially learning to just be strong and work through things without falling to pieces. I just think I've gone a bit too far and started becoming really closed. Gosh darn it! I need to find a good medium, lol.
BTW: I'll be in LA through Sunday so church people, don't expect to see me at church. I'll be doing interviews and auditions and if I get callbacks that's what I'll be doing Sunday. Sunday, Sunday, Someday!