so ummm yeah...
I've had weird feelings about a couple of things lately, Like I have a feeling that someone is thinking something and that they are doing something. And one of those two weird feelings was confirmed when I signed on line today... It makes me wonder if the other one was true but there is no way of confirming it. I'm probably just so caught up in everything that I wish for that I'm imagining it is coming true... I should really go figure out what my last few dreams have meant, maybe that will answer something...
I feel like something just isn't right and I'm scared to find out what it is. I think it involves him, and that usually drives me crazy unless I'm trying to figure out what it is, but I don't want to figure anything out concerning him, I don't want anything to do with him... I just want to forget about him, but something keeps me worring... It's weird I can sit and think about him and really feel that everything is better now, I really am happier with out him, and a lot of things that went wrong don't bug me any more, but sometimes I randomly get upset about just a few things, and I find it really weird that sometimes I randomly care, and how sometimes I randomly still hurt. I was happy with him and I don't regret anything, but I don't want him back any more, cause I really have realized that the guy I loved doesn't exsist anymore. He's not the same person. Right now I've realized I am happy alone...
Anyways on to another thought...
You say you don't understand my reactions, well understand this, It's been two months since I got out of a shitty relationship that was just a little over a year, and it's been two weeks since you got out of a good relationship that lasted two years. I know that I'm not at all ready to go diving into another relationship right now, and somehow you think your ready? Well I know your not, I know right now your just on the rebound, and in someways I still am too... I hate that you made me that rebound girl, I know that's all it will ever be, cause you've always had feelings for me but you've always choose her. You pushed things too fast the other night, you wanted things to move faster than they needed to or than I wanted them too, I'm not going to put my heart right back on the like to have it broken again, and I know that right now all you could do is break it. You didn' think the other night. There is no way that your heart could be in it, it's still to attached to her. Our friendship has lasted 4 years now and you had to go mess that up. I wasn't ready and you wouldn't take the hint, I don't know how to act around you now, and I don't know if I can confide in you the way I used to be able to.
There was one peron who I really thought was different, someone who I thought could keep my secrets, I sacrificed so much to keep yours, how could you so easily tell mine? It hurts that you could do that, then turn your back on me?
Right now I just want time to myself before I go and screw any more of my closest friendships up, I'd rather just run from them all than loose another one...
I feel like something just isn't right and I'm scared to find out what it is. I think it involves him, and that usually drives me crazy unless I'm trying to figure out what it is, but I don't want to figure anything out concerning him, I don't want anything to do with him... I just want to forget about him, but something keeps me worring... It's weird I can sit and think about him and really feel that everything is better now, I really am happier with out him, and a lot of things that went wrong don't bug me any more, but sometimes I randomly get upset about just a few things, and I find it really weird that sometimes I randomly care, and how sometimes I randomly still hurt. I was happy with him and I don't regret anything, but I don't want him back any more, cause I really have realized that the guy I loved doesn't exsist anymore. He's not the same person. Right now I've realized I am happy alone...
Anyways on to another thought...
You say you don't understand my reactions, well understand this, It's been two months since I got out of a shitty relationship that was just a little over a year, and it's been two weeks since you got out of a good relationship that lasted two years. I know that I'm not at all ready to go diving into another relationship right now, and somehow you think your ready? Well I know your not, I know right now your just on the rebound, and in someways I still am too... I hate that you made me that rebound girl, I know that's all it will ever be, cause you've always had feelings for me but you've always choose her. You pushed things too fast the other night, you wanted things to move faster than they needed to or than I wanted them too, I'm not going to put my heart right back on the like to have it broken again, and I know that right now all you could do is break it. You didn' think the other night. There is no way that your heart could be in it, it's still to attached to her. Our friendship has lasted 4 years now and you had to go mess that up. I wasn't ready and you wouldn't take the hint, I don't know how to act around you now, and I don't know if I can confide in you the way I used to be able to.
There was one peron who I really thought was different, someone who I thought could keep my secrets, I sacrificed so much to keep yours, how could you so easily tell mine? It hurts that you could do that, then turn your back on me?
Right now I just want time to myself before I go and screw any more of my closest friendships up, I'd rather just run from them all than loose another one...