I don't get it.
I am a tired person. Yes, I am a person that is tired of love and all the other crap that goes along with it. For instance, I hate having a crush on some one. Frankly, its a waste of my time and energy. All I do is think about him day in and day out. It is quite a distraction. And I hate feeling like "I CA'T WAIT TO SEE HIM" feeling-I feel like I will literally die if I don't see him soon. I am about to burst in anticipation. Why can't I just tell him? Why not just whatever, I don't know. The reason is that I cannot bear the possibility of being rejected-if you know me at all, you probably know that I often just spill my guts without thinking of the emotional consequences. It never bothered me to tell someone how I felt, but the past has caught up with me. I can no longer stomach the pain that is associated with the phrase "you're a great girl, and I am terribly flattered, but....". If this is where am I at, what then am I supposed to do? I can't live not knowing-it's the worst feeling in the world. No one should have to go through the agony of not knowing. Also, an additional problem that I have withi liking someone of the opposite sex, is not being sure if he feels the same way about me. Most of the time (and I mean at least 90% of the time) I am dead wrong. So, I am here, feeling sorry for myself and cursing the day that I set my eyes on this guy/man. Oh well. Another day another dollar.