I am crying . . .
Today was definately not the best days of my life. Wanna know why? well lets see . . . . I have worked hard all throughout high school so far to be in the club I really enjoy. What is this club, you ponder? Student Council. Next year when we are running for offices. what the hell am i going to run for!?!? YOU tell me! Cause I sure as HELL dont! Anything I want to run for, I cant because I know IM GOING TO LOSE! Its a proven fact. and I HATE IT! I dont want to lose. The voting for student council officers is a popularity contest. The more you know people, the better chance you have of winning. <= I know some people are going to be pissed because I said that, but it is the truth and thats how I feel, so deal with it. My problem is not what position am I going to run for, but I want to be an officer! That is like my whole thing! I want it sooo bad. I cant risk running against someone, if I know im going to lose. Yes, Im going to be in the period, but . . . its not the same. I want to feel like I belong, and I dont. Right now at this very second...I dont feel like I belong in student council. I feel segregated....everyone is telling each other who is right for the job and who will do better, but Im not getting anything. Maybe I should just quit. I joined student council to fit in, to be part of something. True there are people I really do like, but it's not like I am one of them. It really really isn't.
Your probably thinking, well then why dont you tell someone? Who!? tell me who to tell?! I can't tell anyone anything, without having someone jump down my throat, or talk behind my back. Either way someone is going to talk behind my back....its already started. Who do I turn to? Who do I tell? please tell me. and either way, if pretty sure the people that need to be reading this are all ready mad enough or annoyed with me. Well, I am sorry I haven't helped that much in StuCo. if im not acting like a true member. If i'm such a loser, maybe I shouldn't be in StuCo, then so be it...... maybe I'll just quit. . . . .
Thank you for reading this