(no subject)
And I left that place with yet another feeling of slight dissapointment but another feeling as well. One of knowing, but not of my own if that makes sense. I still heard in a small back corner of my mind that I should be excited about him. I cant say when or how or why but I know that I know there is something special about him. I left confused and irritated what does it mean when somone waves at you instead of talks to you? Is he shy, nervous, scared,cocky,arrogant? But something in me told me to shut up and be patient. I am learning patience in more ways than just in that way and it is humbling yet refreshing. As if I have been looking the other wayall of these years when all I really had to do was ask. Ask and you shall recieve. I ask to be humbled and I feel my anger lift away from me. The anger that had become a part of my person has disappeared after all of these years and all I had to do was ask. It's amazing to think that something that sounds that simple is really very hard. I can forgive anyone that has ever wronged me and its like a breath of fresh air. I hated holding grudges yet coulnt let go either-how can you hold a grudge against someone for dying? I dont think it really makes any sense-yet it did to me.