Really?
Is it truly possible that this is my first drunk post? Seriously? And I have nothing of interest to say. How typical.
Oh, oh I know. Okay, so this chick at work decided she couldn't be friends with me. (Remember I work for the government and all of us are damaged.) Anywho... so she ignores me and I her and so on and so forth. So tonight we had like 2 hours to kill before we were supposed to go to a going away party for another chick, so we went to the bar in our parking lot for some other guy's birthday. The point is, that she was there. And we were at the same table. So I'm being like extra loud and funny (that's what I do when I'm uncomfortable - 'cause I sure as hell am not gonna let you know that you're hurting me) anyway, and she writes something on the back of someone else's credit card thing - you know the one you give to the bar, anyway she writes on it and folds it and hands it to me. It says "I miss you." So later, I went outside with a couple others to smoke (I know, and I will quit at some point. I really will.) Anyway, she came out. So my friend V goes back inside. And this chick says "she's very lovely." And I say, "yes, she is." Then she says "And very sweet." And I say "yes, she is". So this completely nasty old man starts telling some story about a 70 year old musician and halfway through, she leans over and kisses me on the cheek. Seriously. So V and I leave a bit later and meet these other people for the going away thing. And it is entirely possible that I had one too many appletinis, but yummy they were good. Oh - and at the first bar I had a blowjob, which is Bailey's and whiskey and whipped cream. And everybody found it hilarious that I was the only one who could take the whole thing in my mouth. You know, 'cause of the lesbian thing. But why does it have to have such a stupid name? Anyway, so we're at the other place and I decided that I was just drunk enough to text this chick. So I do. And I say basically, what the fuck? You say you can't be my friend and then you say you miss me and then you kiss me. What the fuck am I supposed to do with that? She replied back. This was her text in its entirety: "Nothing." Oh, okay, well thanks for clearing that up.
I tried to find out the name of the guy my boss is banging, but she was far too clever for me. Or she just wasn't as drunk. Something to ponder later.
But, a good time was had by all and everyone got home safe and sound. And now I've had my advil and water so I'm going to bed. Good night.
Oh, oh I know. Okay, so this chick at work decided she couldn't be friends with me. (Remember I work for the government and all of us are damaged.) Anywho... so she ignores me and I her and so on and so forth. So tonight we had like 2 hours to kill before we were supposed to go to a going away party for another chick, so we went to the bar in our parking lot for some other guy's birthday. The point is, that she was there. And we were at the same table. So I'm being like extra loud and funny (that's what I do when I'm uncomfortable - 'cause I sure as hell am not gonna let you know that you're hurting me) anyway, and she writes something on the back of someone else's credit card thing - you know the one you give to the bar, anyway she writes on it and folds it and hands it to me. It says "I miss you." So later, I went outside with a couple others to smoke (I know, and I will quit at some point. I really will.) Anyway, she came out. So my friend V goes back inside. And this chick says "she's very lovely." And I say, "yes, she is." Then she says "And very sweet." And I say "yes, she is". So this completely nasty old man starts telling some story about a 70 year old musician and halfway through, she leans over and kisses me on the cheek. Seriously. So V and I leave a bit later and meet these other people for the going away thing. And it is entirely possible that I had one too many appletinis, but yummy they were good. Oh - and at the first bar I had a blowjob, which is Bailey's and whiskey and whipped cream. And everybody found it hilarious that I was the only one who could take the whole thing in my mouth. You know, 'cause of the lesbian thing. But why does it have to have such a stupid name? Anyway, so we're at the other place and I decided that I was just drunk enough to text this chick. So I do. And I say basically, what the fuck? You say you can't be my friend and then you say you miss me and then you kiss me. What the fuck am I supposed to do with that? She replied back. This was her text in its entirety: "Nothing." Oh, okay, well thanks for clearing that up.
I tried to find out the name of the guy my boss is banging, but she was far too clever for me. Or she just wasn't as drunk. Something to ponder later.
But, a good time was had by all and everyone got home safe and sound. And now I've had my advil and water so I'm going to bed. Good night.