friends

[sweetcolour]

the past week has been the worst week this summer. my cousin cole's (not the baby) grampa died sunday. his grampa was basically my grampa. i grew up with him. i am really devastated about his death. i was just talking about how much i missed them like 3 days before he passed. He passed on the 11th which is also really freaky because the 11th is such a weird number for me. i don't really want to get into all that right now though. i have been thinking about my friends. my true friends right now are jeremy, rose and christ. it's hard for me to sincerely trust anyone anymore and i feel bad for not being able to do so, but i just get to hurt. chirst is leaving for the airforce here pretty soon and that is going to hurt. im sick of all of my friends either being taken away from me or them doing stupid things that didn't need to happen. there have been alot of my friends that just do things without thinking and it just sort of turns me off of them. i just sort of watch it all happen and then just curl up and cut off communication. i don't even talk to them or anything. i don't understand why i do that...maybe because it's easier then trying to work it all out? i dunno. i miss rose and she has only been gone like 3 days. jeremy gets home tomorrow from florida but i am not expecting to see him until thursday because something always happens and it always becomes an extra day. my hemp jewelry business has been blowing up! everyone wants to buy them. right now i have to shipments in florida. i am now creating a new batch at home. well i will write back later

peace
-erika