(no subject)
These have been the longest 2weeks of my life. The first week i was home sick almost bedridden and it sucked. The second week (this past week) my grandfather was on his death bed. He was a very sick man who survived 3 bad strokes; 1 of which left him paralized and he learned everything all over again. Thank god that he didn't suffer from pain for long;the pain started 3 weeks ago. On June 23, 2004 at 11:30pm my grandfather died. I knew it was going to happen that day, i just had a feeling. We had to freeze him so that my uncle (18 years old and in the army) could come back from Germany where he was stationed. The events were settled and today (June 27) we went to NY for the funeral which was organized by my mom , my uncle (her bro), 3 other of his kids and his wife. Today was the sadest day of my life and my mom's as well. Within these 3 weeks of my grandfather's pain he went from weighing 165 to 120 it was horrible and i couldn't bare to look at him. During the funeral when i looked at him, just laying there, he looked like a different person. There was a picture of him next to the cascat, they were like 2 different people. Im not sure wat broke my heart more, to see him just laying there or for the first tiem in almost 15 years to see my mother crying. We went to ny early this morning (brooklyn)to go to the funeral home. WE got there around 9:00 and 9:30 we went inside the funeral home. From 9:30-10:00 we had alone time with him and at 10:00 everyone started arriving. For all of those that know me best, u also know that im not religous in any way, except for this. 10-11 everyone was arriving and at 11 the rabbi started to read, he read in both yidish and russian.Then the immediate fam (the widow and 3 kids,my fam, and my uncle's fam) and some more, went to the cemetary to see the berial. There once again my heart was broken. When we got there the grave was dug, and all the soil that they dug up, they put on my grandmother's grave (right next to my grandfather's as of today, no gravestone yet). That made me cry even more and i could see the pain in my father's eyes. Then the rabi read some more and they put the soil over the grave adn over that the flowers. I despise the rabbi, he didn't care that this happened to my grandmother's grave and he was rude adn trying to speed things up, i wanted to tell him everything i thought of him, but i held back. Then we went to the widow's house (2 of my grandfather's kids live there)and we ate and talked. This whole ordeal took all day because with our luck there was traffic, it took us hours to drive a distant that would normally take 45 min. -1 maybe a bit more. As of now this was the sadest day of my life and i hope not to experience this again any time soon.IM still crying, it was a horrible experience. Well tomorrow is camp and maybe it'll help me get over the pain.