end of a big long fight a good bye...for now i guess
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: never speak to me ever again, online, on the phone, in school or elsewhere
if you would be so kind as to tell Lindsey that too, if i dont get a chance to before you will
whenever either one of you tries to talk to me, i try my best to be nice to either one of you, and all i get is shit on for it, so you can both leave me alone from this point forth
fuzzygreendice13: otay and I don't know what I've done in the past few days. . . the last thing I did was ask you about records. . . so okay, I shall do that then. . .
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: it was nothing you said recently, it was Lindsey
fuzzygreendice13: oh, well I don't think you should be draggin me into this then
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: can i ask you something?
fuzzygreendice13: sure
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: do you know why she was mad at me for offering her a ride home? she thought i was dancing with Chelsea to make her jealous, when i didnt even know Chelsea and her were friends, and then after the dance i offered her a ride home, because i cant help but be nice in any situtation, and she was extrememely pissed off at me for it
fuzzygreendice13: (I'm going to try to put this in a way that I won't offened you or lindsey so here it goes) Chelsea kind of likes you and Lindsey's just concerned for her because. . . not to sound mean but. . . in the past when a girl liked you, you don't have a very good track record with that kind of thing and Lindsey just didn't see why all of the sudden you were being nice and offering her a ride home. That's all I know about it. Lindsey only tells me parts of things and the rest gets locked in her head.
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: alright, thanks
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: now that i know what she is thinking and what she knows, then i can understand what she said and why she was mad, and i wouldnt have gotten mad at her
fuzzygreendice13: alright
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: alright, i dont think she wants to talk to me, and i sure as hell dont watn to talk to her, cuz she just gets mad and i always make her feel bad apparently, and id dont want to do that, and she makes me mad and i dont want that either, so could you tell her something for me
fuzzygreendice13: sure
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: let me think of how to word it
fuzzygreendice13: okay, just make it nice or I won't relay the message.
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: thats what im trying to fo
fuzzygreendice13: I see then
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: hmmm...
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: well, ill ask you what you think
fuzzygreendice13: oh my. . . does this mean the world is going to blow up? haha
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: that wouldnt be too bad
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: i like explosions
fuzzygreendice13: I'm sure you do
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: i want to tell her nicely, that every time she talks to me i try to be nice to her but she misunderstands what im doing or trying and she gets mad at me
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: so when i try to be nice she gets mad at me and then i get mad at her
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: and tahts not good, so we decide angrily never to talk and that actually works, until she talks to me again, i try to be nice, and the whole thing starts over again
fuzzygreendice13: So what you are trying to say is:
You and Lindsey both have good intentions when you try to talk to each othr and you don't come across like you want to and it causes a mess?
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: exactly
fuzzygreendice13: otay then
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: and the reason i included you in the previous rant, i thought that you were the one who left me angry messages at the same time Lindsey did last night, cuz it was a screen name i had never seen before, and it looked like your font and colorscheme, and you have alot of ever changing SNs
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: so i apologize for that undeserved anger'
fuzzygreendice13: Well thank you and it was not me who left you angry messages, this is the first time in over a week that i've been online at all
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: well then theres someone out there with just as many SNs as you who also imparts mostly sound advice witha tint of anger and a few spelling errors
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: its a scary thought that someone else like you is out there:-P
fuzzygreendice13: Yes, because one crazy creepy girl is enough
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: exactly
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: i guess rather necessary, but no more than one
fuzzygreendice13: and now I'm not sure wheather to laugh or punch a wall :-D
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: oh, i didnt mean tomake you mad
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: i was kidding
fuzzygreendice13: It wasn't anyting you did, what I said just made me think about something. . . I think
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: alright
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: well lets change the subject then please, ive had enough anger for a while, unless of course you would like to talk about it
fuzzygreendice13: No, lets change the subject
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: i know this is weird, but i am very good at reasoning these things out, people have said, and they say i help
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: alright
awhile later
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: im sorry too
lillinnychic: what i hated the most is your right and i'm an ass
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: you arent an ass
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: you have alot to deal with im sure, and i know its never easy
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: i just was mad cuz i thought you were mad at me, and all i was ever doing was trying to be nice, to you offereing you a ride home, and to my friend and friends girlfriend, since he wasnt there, she looked bored so i was trying to be nice to her
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: i wasnt doing it to make you jealous, or to steal her from dave, or anything at all other than just trying to be nice
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: and everytime i try to be nice(to anyone at all ever) all i get is shit on for it
lillinnychic: my away wasn't ment to be mean i was just really confused with what was going on and i'm sorry if i know you it is you said you wanted to be friends and i was talking to as that and the ride thing was just to hang out i didn't know you hated me or whatever and if this is make no sense i'm sorry i'm trying to just fill you in and i'm not good at this because i want to lock everything up
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: its ok
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: its hard to talk about all this stuff, for me too
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: but i think we should just not talk to eachother because every time it turns out the same
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: i try and be nice to you and i think you are pissed off at me for it so i get mad and then we yell at eachother, and agree never to speak again, then it happens again
lillinnychic: i know i really don't want to fight with you but i'm never mad i'm just confused i don't get mad till you do and then i don't know what i did and i get upset and hateing myself and it just gets ugly
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: alot of the reason i get mad is from reading those messages you leave me and away message you have up
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: if you want to tell me something, doing it like that will almost surely make me mad, no matter what it is you are saying
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: if you just tell me a little bit at a time and i can respond right after, then we would understand eachother better
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: and this wouldnt happen
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: well, i think it wouldnt, i dont know
lillinnychic: the away messages are my way of saying what i want and i really never know how i feel and
lillinnychic: sometimes i just want you to know without talking to you in fear that you'll get mad at me and i really hate fight just right now i'm trying to become a person agian
lillinnychic: this is really hard to explain but i'm trying my best
lillinnychic: and you can shut me up at anytime
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: if you want me not to get mad, then talk to me directly, im normally a reasonable person, but when you just keep going and going when you leave messages, then i cant tell you what i think or why i did something
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: i need a chance to defend myself and to tell you what i think or what im going through
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: its got to be two sided
lillinnychic: i know it does....
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: i think that for now the best thing would be for us not to talk for a while
lillinnychic: :-\ if you think so
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: cuz the stuff that you had in your away message made me feel like a piece of shit, and they made me really really angry
lillinnychic: do you know you made me cry i went and locked myself in the bathroom
lillinnychic: for an hour i just sat there
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: honestly, i really dont care anymore, im sorry that i dont and its weird that i dont, but ive just been through too much crap cuz of what you have done and said to me, ive gone through my own crap, im not gonna get into that now though
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: :-\
lillinnychic: i know you don't and i'm really sorry about everything and i know it isn't going to fix anything and for me it never helps but i want you to know that
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: thanks
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: and im sorry too, if it helps any
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: wether it helps or not, i am
lillinnychic: i don't know if it helps but its nice to hear
lillinnychic: well see i guess
lillinnychic: you just really easy to talk to and you really listen and i'm going to miss that about you
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: give it some time, and maybe ill be ready to talk again
lillinnychic: i may not be then i'm just to messed up. i'm tring to make sense of me and i really need help and i don't know where to go
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: i cant help you, im sorry
lillinnychic: i know you can't
lillinnychic: and i don't need a reason why
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: you could try talking someone, like the guidance counselers at school
lillinnychic: no i'll do this myself they really don't help
lillinnychic: FYI: just so you know i still care because i promised i would so i do and i can't help that
lillinnychic: i want one more thing before i go
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: what is that?
lillinnychic: answer my questions i sent you last night.....they weren't meant to be mean (i really can't do this online you can't tell my tone i need to stop that)
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: what were the question
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: s?
lillinnychic: if you don't know what i'm talking about then forget it
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: no, i want to give you all the answers i can now
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: and then after you are done then i want to ask you one
lillinnychic: they were just mainly if you think i was really happy with i was doing
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: no, i dont think you are
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: idk..
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: you info earlier said something about me just wanting to get laid...
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: was that really about me and if it was do you really believe that?.
lillinnychic: it was and i don't know i think i was just trying to hurt you and i was just mad and......i don't know
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: i dont want you to think that about me
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: that has never and will never be my first thought
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: im not that kind of person
lillinnychic: i won't and don't but i have to go my mom is mad
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: ok
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: bye
lillinnychic: bye
if you would be so kind as to tell Lindsey that too, if i dont get a chance to before you will
whenever either one of you tries to talk to me, i try my best to be nice to either one of you, and all i get is shit on for it, so you can both leave me alone from this point forth
fuzzygreendice13: otay and I don't know what I've done in the past few days. . . the last thing I did was ask you about records. . . so okay, I shall do that then. . .
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: it was nothing you said recently, it was Lindsey
fuzzygreendice13: oh, well I don't think you should be draggin me into this then
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: can i ask you something?
fuzzygreendice13: sure
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: do you know why she was mad at me for offering her a ride home? she thought i was dancing with Chelsea to make her jealous, when i didnt even know Chelsea and her were friends, and then after the dance i offered her a ride home, because i cant help but be nice in any situtation, and she was extrememely pissed off at me for it
fuzzygreendice13: (I'm going to try to put this in a way that I won't offened you or lindsey so here it goes) Chelsea kind of likes you and Lindsey's just concerned for her because. . . not to sound mean but. . . in the past when a girl liked you, you don't have a very good track record with that kind of thing and Lindsey just didn't see why all of the sudden you were being nice and offering her a ride home. That's all I know about it. Lindsey only tells me parts of things and the rest gets locked in her head.
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: alright, thanks
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: now that i know what she is thinking and what she knows, then i can understand what she said and why she was mad, and i wouldnt have gotten mad at her
fuzzygreendice13: alright
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: alright, i dont think she wants to talk to me, and i sure as hell dont watn to talk to her, cuz she just gets mad and i always make her feel bad apparently, and id dont want to do that, and she makes me mad and i dont want that either, so could you tell her something for me
fuzzygreendice13: sure
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: let me think of how to word it
fuzzygreendice13: okay, just make it nice or I won't relay the message.
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: thats what im trying to fo
fuzzygreendice13: I see then
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: hmmm...
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: well, ill ask you what you think
fuzzygreendice13: oh my. . . does this mean the world is going to blow up? haha
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: that wouldnt be too bad
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: i like explosions
fuzzygreendice13: I'm sure you do
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: i want to tell her nicely, that every time she talks to me i try to be nice to her but she misunderstands what im doing or trying and she gets mad at me
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: so when i try to be nice she gets mad at me and then i get mad at her
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: and tahts not good, so we decide angrily never to talk and that actually works, until she talks to me again, i try to be nice, and the whole thing starts over again
fuzzygreendice13: So what you are trying to say is:
You and Lindsey both have good intentions when you try to talk to each othr and you don't come across like you want to and it causes a mess?
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: exactly
fuzzygreendice13: otay then
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: and the reason i included you in the previous rant, i thought that you were the one who left me angry messages at the same time Lindsey did last night, cuz it was a screen name i had never seen before, and it looked like your font and colorscheme, and you have alot of ever changing SNs
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: so i apologize for that undeserved anger'
fuzzygreendice13: Well thank you and it was not me who left you angry messages, this is the first time in over a week that i've been online at all
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: well then theres someone out there with just as many SNs as you who also imparts mostly sound advice witha tint of anger and a few spelling errors
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: its a scary thought that someone else like you is out there:-P
fuzzygreendice13: Yes, because one crazy creepy girl is enough
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: exactly
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: i guess rather necessary, but no more than one
fuzzygreendice13: and now I'm not sure wheather to laugh or punch a wall :-D
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: oh, i didnt mean tomake you mad
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: i was kidding
fuzzygreendice13: It wasn't anyting you did, what I said just made me think about something. . . I think
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: alright
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: well lets change the subject then please, ive had enough anger for a while, unless of course you would like to talk about it
fuzzygreendice13: No, lets change the subject
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: i know this is weird, but i am very good at reasoning these things out, people have said, and they say i help
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: alright
awhile later
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: im sorry too
lillinnychic: what i hated the most is your right and i'm an ass
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: you arent an ass
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: you have alot to deal with im sure, and i know its never easy
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: i just was mad cuz i thought you were mad at me, and all i was ever doing was trying to be nice, to you offereing you a ride home, and to my friend and friends girlfriend, since he wasnt there, she looked bored so i was trying to be nice to her
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: i wasnt doing it to make you jealous, or to steal her from dave, or anything at all other than just trying to be nice
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: and everytime i try to be nice(to anyone at all ever) all i get is shit on for it
lillinnychic: my away wasn't ment to be mean i was just really confused with what was going on and i'm sorry if i know you it is you said you wanted to be friends and i was talking to as that and the ride thing was just to hang out i didn't know you hated me or whatever and if this is make no sense i'm sorry i'm trying to just fill you in and i'm not good at this because i want to lock everything up
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: its ok
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: its hard to talk about all this stuff, for me too
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: but i think we should just not talk to eachother because every time it turns out the same
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: i try and be nice to you and i think you are pissed off at me for it so i get mad and then we yell at eachother, and agree never to speak again, then it happens again
lillinnychic: i know i really don't want to fight with you but i'm never mad i'm just confused i don't get mad till you do and then i don't know what i did and i get upset and hateing myself and it just gets ugly
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: alot of the reason i get mad is from reading those messages you leave me and away message you have up
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: if you want to tell me something, doing it like that will almost surely make me mad, no matter what it is you are saying
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: if you just tell me a little bit at a time and i can respond right after, then we would understand eachother better
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: and this wouldnt happen
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: well, i think it wouldnt, i dont know
lillinnychic: the away messages are my way of saying what i want and i really never know how i feel and
lillinnychic: sometimes i just want you to know without talking to you in fear that you'll get mad at me and i really hate fight just right now i'm trying to become a person agian
lillinnychic: this is really hard to explain but i'm trying my best
lillinnychic: and you can shut me up at anytime
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: if you want me not to get mad, then talk to me directly, im normally a reasonable person, but when you just keep going and going when you leave messages, then i cant tell you what i think or why i did something
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: i need a chance to defend myself and to tell you what i think or what im going through
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: its got to be two sided
lillinnychic: i know it does....
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: i think that for now the best thing would be for us not to talk for a while
lillinnychic: :-\ if you think so
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: cuz the stuff that you had in your away message made me feel like a piece of shit, and they made me really really angry
lillinnychic: do you know you made me cry i went and locked myself in the bathroom
lillinnychic: for an hour i just sat there
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: honestly, i really dont care anymore, im sorry that i dont and its weird that i dont, but ive just been through too much crap cuz of what you have done and said to me, ive gone through my own crap, im not gonna get into that now though
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: :-\
lillinnychic: i know you don't and i'm really sorry about everything and i know it isn't going to fix anything and for me it never helps but i want you to know that
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: thanks
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: and im sorry too, if it helps any
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: wether it helps or not, i am
lillinnychic: i don't know if it helps but its nice to hear
lillinnychic: well see i guess
lillinnychic: you just really easy to talk to and you really listen and i'm going to miss that about you
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: give it some time, and maybe ill be ready to talk again
lillinnychic: i may not be then i'm just to messed up. i'm tring to make sense of me and i really need help and i don't know where to go
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: i cant help you, im sorry
lillinnychic: i know you can't
lillinnychic: and i don't need a reason why
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: you could try talking someone, like the guidance counselers at school
lillinnychic: no i'll do this myself they really don't help
lillinnychic: FYI: just so you know i still care because i promised i would so i do and i can't help that
lillinnychic: i want one more thing before i go
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: what is that?
lillinnychic: answer my questions i sent you last night.....they weren't meant to be mean (i really can't do this online you can't tell my tone i need to stop that)
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: what were the question
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: s?
lillinnychic: if you don't know what i'm talking about then forget it
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: no, i want to give you all the answers i can now
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: and then after you are done then i want to ask you one
lillinnychic: they were just mainly if you think i was really happy with i was doing
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: no, i dont think you are
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: idk..
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: you info earlier said something about me just wanting to get laid...
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: was that really about me and if it was do you really believe that?.
lillinnychic: it was and i don't know i think i was just trying to hurt you and i was just mad and......i don't know
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: i dont want you to think that about me
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: that has never and will never be my first thought
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: im not that kind of person
lillinnychic: i won't and don't but i have to go my mom is mad
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: ok
GlVETHlSMANARlDE: bye
lillinnychic: bye