abandonment
so i have gotten the old blog stuff going on. i shall hav to abandon this one... soon. perhaps after all the tests and shit. am feeling so emotionless. its always liddat... perhaps just before a test. i feel numb inside. very very numb inside. or maybe it is because i cried this morning. after a cry. u tend to feel numb inside for the rest of the day or night or following morning. i'm so confused over my emotions and feelings. i cannot tell the difference between pain and sadness anymore.
i feel like i'm floating alongside a dead river. and of course, dead water holds much salt and grime.
DEAD RIVER
skeletal arms reach out towards the new bright sky
trees weeping their tears of brown blood
blood mattered in my hair, tangled, caught
inside my dead eyes, open and raw
my anus feeling the prick of vinegar
they stuff me up inside
doggy-styled, a mannequin
whhite plastic strands binded with my hair
sleeping stars cannot save me
they hide from the dark forest canopy
i crawl and shivel, eating my own snort and mucous
fingernails black with dead blood cells
i'm naked
breasts aside, i'm open for all to see
to touch and to cradle
to draw... to manipulate
i was made a doll
to serve and to die
for the sake of others
i feel like i'm floating alongside a dead river. and of course, dead water holds much salt and grime.
DEAD RIVER
skeletal arms reach out towards the new bright sky
trees weeping their tears of brown blood
blood mattered in my hair, tangled, caught
inside my dead eyes, open and raw
my anus feeling the prick of vinegar
they stuff me up inside
doggy-styled, a mannequin
whhite plastic strands binded with my hair
sleeping stars cannot save me
they hide from the dark forest canopy
i crawl and shivel, eating my own snort and mucous
fingernails black with dead blood cells
i'm naked
breasts aside, i'm open for all to see
to touch and to cradle
to draw... to manipulate
i was made a doll
to serve and to die
for the sake of others