WHY
Ok so here is how i am feeling today. Well for the last few weeks anyways. I feel that i am being backed into a corner and cant get out. I mean i wish that life was simple and i know i need to make some changes don't get me wrong i know this. There are some people out there that don't really understand that for me it is hard to make those kind of changes. I mean life changing changes. I suggested being friends with a friend of mine because they werent sure what was going to happen and personally i would rather be friends than have a relationship that is long distance. please belive me this isnt easy for me. I know i may have made people mad with my desicion but you know what i'm sorry for what its worth. I know deep in my heart that i'm not ready for a long long distance relationship with someone when they honestly and truely dont know what they want either. I know what i want. i want a stable relationship one where i can see my bf more than once or twice a year. I want him to go and do what he needs to do. I wish him the best i'm just not cut out for it right now. Another thing that has been bugging me is how my other friend we will call her JJ has been treating me. I went with her last weekend to Laphette and all she did was complain about this and that. She pointed out that she is the only friend that comes out to get me because no one wants to bring me out to her. Well i'm sorry that i cnat drive if i could i would but get over it. i also pay for more than my fair share of the shit we do when we hang out. i pay for both of us for dinner and some drinks most of the time when she wants to do something i have to go and ask my parents for money because she dont wanna help me out well guess what i'm done being everyones doormat. If you dont like what i say i'm sorry but deal with it. For those of you who are my friends I mean real true friends I'm sorry that i cant dirve to come pick you up so we can hang out. Seleene you are without a dought my bestest bestest friend in the world. and neppyman you are also a great friend to me keep that in mind always. ok i think i am done now i hope.