You tell me that your crazy, you're lovin' gets me crazy
So, I need to analyze a certain something that I find embarrassing. :/ I uploaded pictures of Shayne & I onto facebook last night... from his photobooth... but he felt uncomfortable about it because he's "private". I'm trying to figure out if I'm the one acting unnaturally. I mean, it sounds better to be private about intimate things and not all "PDA" on the internet. But, I can't help but to want to have an album of "him & me" pictures. I think the pictures are cute... not all gross making out. Just very lovey... but I guess guys don't like that stuff... it's different the way males & females see certain things. I can't help but to feel dumb and immature for posting those pictures. Maybe it's time to grow up and not be so public about everything. I love pictures and I love posting them for everyone to see. But I think that can get me into trouble. Like Victoria, from OIP, told me... I let everyone know about everything in my life and that tends to get me into problems. I think that I should just keep to myself a little more... I mean not completely but anything less will be better than now. That way people can't criticize me if I change my mind about certain things because I'm not so public. Hmmm. Why do I like to be so public? Why do I want people to know what I'm doing and what I think? Why do I need the attention? That's basically what it is. I like attention and I thrive off of getting it. But I think I take it to an unhealthy extreme. I mean I like to post pictures so I can look back on past times. But I can easily keep a private album... like on iPhoto for free. But what if I need to send my Mac Book in for fixing again... my stuff will get erased. Well, I can bust a Shayne & purchase hard drive.
So, basically I should grow up? I mean I'm not immature but I guess in that aspect I am. Is that immaturity? I'm confused. Whatever. I guess I feel bad when people tell me to not be who I am. But Shayne does not mind that I'm like this... it only makes him uncomfortable when he gets dragged in. I don’t know. I guess that's why I started writing over here... so no one could see my thoughts & I could write what I really wanted to write. If I know someone is going to read my entry then I'll fix things around and probably not speak my true mind. I should not change the way I am just try not to be so public... especially with a large audience like Facebook... and the stalker "newsfeed" crap that informs everyone about everyone else's business. I guess I should go shower. Oh crap... FYI... I was two minutes late to work this morning!!! I need to invest in a freaking' really alarm clock. :(
By the way, I'm proud of myself because I was about to purchase a&f online ($140) but didn't because I knew I didn't have the money. I should call Wells Fargo and inquire on a loan. I need to get these down to zero so I'll stop using them. My rationale is all messed up. I think, "Well they already have a balance... why not?" Uuugh! Also, I need my debit card!!! Let me go check for it in the mail. :)
So, basically I should grow up? I mean I'm not immature but I guess in that aspect I am. Is that immaturity? I'm confused. Whatever. I guess I feel bad when people tell me to not be who I am. But Shayne does not mind that I'm like this... it only makes him uncomfortable when he gets dragged in. I don’t know. I guess that's why I started writing over here... so no one could see my thoughts & I could write what I really wanted to write. If I know someone is going to read my entry then I'll fix things around and probably not speak my true mind. I should not change the way I am just try not to be so public... especially with a large audience like Facebook... and the stalker "newsfeed" crap that informs everyone about everyone else's business. I guess I should go shower. Oh crap... FYI... I was two minutes late to work this morning!!! I need to invest in a freaking' really alarm clock. :(
By the way, I'm proud of myself because I was about to purchase a&f online ($140) but didn't because I knew I didn't have the money. I should call Wells Fargo and inquire on a loan. I need to get these down to zero so I'll stop using them. My rationale is all messed up. I think, "Well they already have a balance... why not?" Uuugh! Also, I need my debit card!!! Let me go check for it in the mail. :)