STW
Get Your Emo Kid Now <3
I was in a good mood. But now.. ugh... serious Shirley Temple low. I've been sleeping since I got home mostly. I always get the worst lows after STW. That and I'm really stressed about like everything. College... debate on Saturday... grades... relationships... there's just too much pressure. Forget therapy. All I want for Christmas is some secobarbital.
Shirley Temple Wednesday, was, however, AMAZING. I just wish more people could have been there. The waitress was more awesome than she usually is though. "Shirley Temple Wednesday! I love you guys!" She definitely got a like hxc tip, but not as much as we're going to do right before Christmas.
Activities included looking around Steinmart, deactivating the electricity to an elevator in a business complex and escaping through a fire exit, sampling things at Fresh Market and seeing Tocco, and burying me at Merrill Park. Good times. Oh, and we tried spinning, but its hard to do in sand.
The rest of the day was decent. Something new was having an opportunity to actually wonder "does she want to keep it?" That doesn't happen every day. Decent grade on the calc test, but not the best. Amanda Bartlett and I hit up Publix for lunch.
I switched places in calc so I was closer to people some of the people I do like and further from some of the people I don't. My former seat was just like a sandwich of depression. I think I'll be in Brian's spot again tomorrow. Variety is good.
Mimi circled good things from Bayridge Sushi. That makes me happy. I think we'll have to go there one night. Stephanie also wants to go there with me. Mitchell does too, but we'd have to drive separately and that's retarded and doesn't make me happy, so, I don't know.
I'm realizing how sad it is that things like Biotech stress me out. I mean, not as much as the class did last year because I'm actually friends with everyone in my two Biotech classes, so I don't loathe going like I did the entire second half and then some of last year, but still. I just get frustrated because I have so much to do and I can't ever focus on doing it. Plus I have to do that thing for the website for the sciences and I really really don't want to. Science fair.... is something I shouldn't have pretended I feel like doing.
I'm also really scared of my college applications. There's just too much to do, and I have no idea what to write about on any of the essays, and just... bleh. And I know I have to give a lot out to my teachers who will recommend me, and to my college counselor, and I just can't seem to get it done.
Then I get stressed about people I used to be friends with. Well, actually, one person in particularly probably never really liked me at all to begin with and it never really hit me that we weren't friends in the first place, which is also painful, but I've mostly cut my losses with that. What can I expect, goats are usually lame anyways. I'm much more concerned with the others.
One I can probably fix things with. I thought we did before, but clearly there are still some underlying issues, but I have faith in that, I was destined to get along with twins.
We need to have a talk.
The other... too much of a stubborn ram. Maybe if we still communicated with each other... but again... too damn stubborn. That's pretty much over.
Oh well, their loss. Only like three or so people out of a lot more than that. But I would like to repair what I can.
I really shouldn't dive into any deeper detail on here. But at least more issues are somewhat more out in the open now... I just wish things could be the way they were. For me at least, it seems impossible. But hey, maybe if someone else can get past what seemed to definitely be irreversible, I can push past some of it too.