Alpha waves and power cables
Wow..I just drank a huge mug of hot chocolate in like 5 minutes and now I feel like i'm either going to piss my pants or explode. Anyways this morning i went outside to feed the cats and one of them decided that he wanted to attack me..and he did..and I was scared so I started or should I say attempted to run away from him, well I ran into a puddle and then proceeded to fall into the puddle..it was a great morning..Not. I didn't go to school today seeing as how after I fell in the puddle I only had 5 minutes to completely clean myself and get to the bus stop..thats impossible. So now i'm sitting at the computer updating my live journal which I haven't really "updated" in awhile. And i've been thinking..about a lot of things..seeing as how i've completely lost my best friend..anyways...
How come people can never be completely happy..its seriously impossible. You cant be satisfied with every aspect of your life..its something you have to understand..and if you don't understand it you tend to think that everything in your life is shit and that you're worthless when really you just haven't taken the time to focus on yourself..you just focus on what other people think of you and the things they 'might' be saying about you..key word being might. Almost every time you think people are talking shit about you they aren't, people don't think about you that much. And if for some reason they do let them..let them waste their time thinking about you..it's kind of flattering, i've decided.
And how come people have to have every little thing they want..why do people think that these materialistic things are going to keep them happy? All thats going to happen is they are going to find some new thing that they can't live without and they are going to spend the days until they get it being unhappy..and the minute it's put in their hands they will be so happy..for how long?..not long at all I give them a month or two..in some cases a couple of business days. Why spend your time being unhappy because you don't have the newest coolest piece of shit..get over it, as a matter of fact you might want to get over yourself and start realizing that what you have can be just as cool as what you dont have..i'm sure there's someone out there who wants it. And by the way actually working for the things you want makes them so much more enjoyable when you actually do get it..you appreciate things so much more, it feels so much better than having it handed to you. I mean having things handed to you is great, but you have to realize sooner or later that things aren't going to be handed to you for very long.
I guess I realized all of this recently because i've been working for things a lot harder and i've been getting everything I want. And it feels awesome when you have something that someone wants or someone compliments something that you, yourself have done. I realized that I can get things done better than anyone can do them for me..I know exactly what I want and sometimes it's really hard to say what you really want but when you do it yourself things just come out better. And if things don't work out you know where you screwed up and you can fix it next time.
This is what happens when you live in Salinas and smoke a lot of pot you think about things like this..or should I say over analyze your life to the fullest. You make a point to capitalize every I and put apostrophes wherever you can..I was never good with commas so I couldn't really put those in, but this is what happens.
This morning right when I woke up I sat up and I looked at my wall thats covered in torn up letters from Taylor and I freaked out..then I looked out my window and it was all rainy and cold..and I freaked out even more. This time of year only reminds me of one thing..Taylor..and I hate it. I wouldn't hate it if we talked if he was actually my friend..but we don't talk and he hates me, and I completely understand why he hates me..I would hate him too. I feel so stupid and I get so disgusted with myself sometimes..I ruined something perfectly good..something that made me really fucking happy..and now all I can do is say oh well..because anything else I say doesn't matter...nothing I say can change things..nothing..I guess I just need to come to terms with that. I have a new life now..my life is like a lifetime movie for teenagers or something..ya.
Anyways i think I should go now..cause i've pretty much been rambling on about nothing..well it's something to me, but basically nothing to the rest of the live journal world.
I want to be drunk soon..someone drink with me.
Peace Out <3
How come people can never be completely happy..its seriously impossible. You cant be satisfied with every aspect of your life..its something you have to understand..and if you don't understand it you tend to think that everything in your life is shit and that you're worthless when really you just haven't taken the time to focus on yourself..you just focus on what other people think of you and the things they 'might' be saying about you..key word being might. Almost every time you think people are talking shit about you they aren't, people don't think about you that much. And if for some reason they do let them..let them waste their time thinking about you..it's kind of flattering, i've decided.
And how come people have to have every little thing they want..why do people think that these materialistic things are going to keep them happy? All thats going to happen is they are going to find some new thing that they can't live without and they are going to spend the days until they get it being unhappy..and the minute it's put in their hands they will be so happy..for how long?..not long at all I give them a month or two..in some cases a couple of business days. Why spend your time being unhappy because you don't have the newest coolest piece of shit..get over it, as a matter of fact you might want to get over yourself and start realizing that what you have can be just as cool as what you dont have..i'm sure there's someone out there who wants it. And by the way actually working for the things you want makes them so much more enjoyable when you actually do get it..you appreciate things so much more, it feels so much better than having it handed to you. I mean having things handed to you is great, but you have to realize sooner or later that things aren't going to be handed to you for very long.
I guess I realized all of this recently because i've been working for things a lot harder and i've been getting everything I want. And it feels awesome when you have something that someone wants or someone compliments something that you, yourself have done. I realized that I can get things done better than anyone can do them for me..I know exactly what I want and sometimes it's really hard to say what you really want but when you do it yourself things just come out better. And if things don't work out you know where you screwed up and you can fix it next time.
This is what happens when you live in Salinas and smoke a lot of pot you think about things like this..or should I say over analyze your life to the fullest. You make a point to capitalize every I and put apostrophes wherever you can..I was never good with commas so I couldn't really put those in, but this is what happens.
This morning right when I woke up I sat up and I looked at my wall thats covered in torn up letters from Taylor and I freaked out..then I looked out my window and it was all rainy and cold..and I freaked out even more. This time of year only reminds me of one thing..Taylor..and I hate it. I wouldn't hate it if we talked if he was actually my friend..but we don't talk and he hates me, and I completely understand why he hates me..I would hate him too. I feel so stupid and I get so disgusted with myself sometimes..I ruined something perfectly good..something that made me really fucking happy..and now all I can do is say oh well..because anything else I say doesn't matter...nothing I say can change things..nothing..I guess I just need to come to terms with that. I have a new life now..my life is like a lifetime movie for teenagers or something..ya.
Anyways i think I should go now..cause i've pretty much been rambling on about nothing..well it's something to me, but basically nothing to the rest of the live journal world.
I want to be drunk soon..someone drink with me.
Peace Out <3