Evening with her...
So, here I am again... whining and blubbering across the screen. Spent the evening with her. Shopping. Me for my friends, her for her family. We went out to dinner. It was nice. I love the way she touches me. She told me she hasn't been on line looking for people... to buisy studyin'. Seen tonight that wasn't true. Dude, seriously... how many online boyfriends does she have?!? It doesn't matter anyways. I at least enjoyed the evening with her. Wasn't mean... It's hard. It's like it's my natural defense or something. I get upset or hurt and turn into Mr. Insta A-hole. ...and I guess I will always be the one in the wrong... story of my life i suppose... whatever. Don't know why she tells me she loves me when she's seems to be meeting all these new people and trying to hook up w/ them? So, it hurts... guess I just need to be more careful as to where I visit out here... LJ is about the only place that seems safe sometimes. I can whine like a little bitch and everyone that responds always has something encouraging to say (thanx to all) and I don't really have to allow anyone the ability to really get to know who I am... it's safe. Buildin' them walls I am, like to see someone get through 'em now, yeah right... Enjoy the weekend and the Holiday's everybody... I'll be drunk as possible for the duration. Viva la resistance!