Asshole of the day 2/9/12
Asshole of the Day 2/9/12
Source: YouTube
Method of Communication: Public comments posted on my Shit People Say to Asexuals YouTube video
Type(s) of Fail: Mother of all tone arguments; "you're overreacting!"; asexuality fail
Result: He stopped responding
What you may need to know: My problem with this guy didn't begin in earnest until he replied to my first comment. He started this interaction by commenting on the video and saying things that sounded like they could have been innocuous OR could have been condescending, smarmy little shit comments. Considering he laughed while pointing out anime-related items in the backgrounds of the featured videos AND laid down the "But . . . but SCIENCE!" comment, I had to ask. The result wasn't pretty.
peterwXXX:
Hahahaha.... manga, Sailor Moon, Plushies... amusing.
That 'asexual' thing was educational and amusing. I see 'asexual' from a scientific stand point...doesn't have the social hangup in the animal world, unlike the human world.
[So . . . considering he laughed at my anime paraphernalia without context, kept putting "asexual" in quotes like he was humoring me, and said vague things about social hangups because HE'S A SCIENTIST . . . it was reasonable of me to ask questions, right?]
swankivy:
I'm not following the thrust of your comment. I'm glad you said you found "that 'asexual' thing" educational, but what "scientific standpoint" are you talking about seeing it from, and to what effect? And is there something particularly amusing to you about plushies, manga, and Sailor Moon (or their appearance in the video)?
peterwXXX:
1, life always amuse me, that you should not take offense to. By "amuse", I mean I grow more enlighten.
2, "for hammers, the world is a nail". For me, being into science, 'asexual' is associated with single cell organism. try to deny that one.
3, It took ages for LGBT to come the current level of 'visibility'. Non-sexual, guess what? It will take time for you, too.
4, Yes, I know of a non-sexual/asexual. She's only into making her comic, even ignoring her temp Bfriend then dumping him.
[I think the last item is my favorite. He cites experience with knowing an asexual! Who of course is someone who only focuses on her comic and dumps her boyfriend, which is incredibly relevant to this conversation! What did any of this have to do with my request for clarification?]
swankivy:
1. I didn't "take offense." I asked you what you meant, because normally people don't point out stuff in the background and then say "that's amusing" without context. I was asking for context.
2. "Asexual" is associated with non-sexual reproduction in a scientific context. It'd be absurd for anyone to think humans were trying to apply "asexual" to be understood as applied to our reproduction. In science as well as everywhere else, context matters . . . so I don't see how "well I'm into science, so asexual can't be applied any other way" makes sense here. We're clearly talking about orientation, not reproduction.
3. I don't see the relevance in you pointing out that awareness will take time for us. I'm aware of this, but this whole "well guess what?" phrasing of your suggests I'm being unreasonable somehow. Are you arguing with an argument I didn't make?
4. I didn't ask you if you knew any asexuals, so factoids about the one you know seem irrelevant. Why would you start with "yes" as if I had suggested you must not know any asexuals?
Look at my comment. I asked for clarification from you. Please avoid being vague if you want people to understand what you're talking about, though the character limit might be limiting your communication. This "the world is a nail" b.s. suggests my asking you to clarify constitutes attacking you.
peterwXXX:
Last few thoughts...
I'm sure you're not exposed to people like me. Personally, I find the world's diversity, rather enriching. This diversity does include LBGT and asexual/non-sexual.
How can I communicate my sincerity through text? I can't. We, you and I, have to deal with it...not able to convey sincerity.
If I were anti-non-heterosexual, would I not go on a rampage and use derogatory remarks? I been to enough cons (and anime cons) to know that there is a diverse community.
[Isn't that cute? He wants ally cookies. Because obviously he'd be a lot more blatantly disgusting if he was against us. No, honey. Actual "sincere" allies don't hand down condescending comments about asexuality BECAUSE SCIENCE and don't make uncalled-for comments about asexuals they know and don't have to point out how prejudiced they're not.]
swankivy:
I don't know what any of this has to do with me. I certainly hope you weren't planning on rampaging using derogatory remarks, and I don't see the purpose of rambling about your sincerity--as if I questioned it?--nor do I see your point in suggesting I must have thought you were "anti-non-heterosexual" when I asked you to clarify your comment.
peterwXXX:
Allow me to reply to the over looked question "And is there something particularly amusing to you about plushies, manga, and Sailor Moon..."
I have my AnimeCon91 badge somewhere (my first trip alone to anywhere), been to AnimeExpo92, cosplayed at both. Been to the first Katsu, Otakon, ACen, AWA, Animazement...Claims of my legit Otakuness.
So, yes. Plushies, manga and Sailor Moon do amuse me as I collect my manga and artbooks. I don't do plushies since I don't have room.
[OH LOOK AT ME LOOK AT ME I'M AN ANIME GEEK AND YOU MISUNDERSTOOD ME! You thought I laughed and called your stuff "amusing" because I was putting you down, but IT WAS THE OPPOSITE! Gee!]
swankivy:
Again, I don't need proof of what you're interested in and I wasn't questioning your integrity. I wanted to know why you essentially pointed at things I own and said "hahaha." When I asked for context by basically saying "what's so funny?" a straight answer is all I needed.
peterwXXX:
I'm trying to say... if you could free your interpretation ...is 'asexual' is something very new to my experience. Are you able to accept that line of thinking? It's... anthropological or biological or sociological. It's not a slight nor insult.
You're acting well overly defensive and you may have legitimate reason to; but, I'm not your enemy.
Again, is there anyway I can convey my sincerity to you over text? No, i'm stuck with what I got and you're stuck with misinterpreting.
[Get that? The poor guy's being misunderstood through no fault of his own--it's MY DETERMINATION TO STICK WITH MISINTERPRETING that has caused this mess. I'm sure it has nothing to do with how people frequently invoke "science" to suggest asexuality can't be a real thing and make jokes about amoebas! You know what? If he's not saying "but 'asexual' refers to reproduction in science, so you shouldn't use it," then WHAT DOES IT HAVE TO DO WITH OUR ORIENTATION? It's a non sequitur! That would be like saying "I'm tall," and having your conversation partner bark back, "Tall? But you have to understand that TALL is a size of drink you can get at Starbucks! I'm a barista--surely you understand why describing yourself as TALL makes me think of coffee!"]
swankivy:
You really don't need to keep trying to find someone to blame for why I didn't understand the first comment you made. I said your comment was vague and asked questions to understand it, but you've decided I must be defensive and "misinterpreting" because I asked for more information. I did not make an assumption about what you meant. As for "asexual's" meaning, apply it as an orientation, and the problem of "this is new to me" goes away for all subsequent interactions. All fixed!
[He didn't write back to this, but one wonders why this is supposedly so "new to him" if he already knew an asexual (who of course thinks of nothing but making comics and dumping boyfriends).]
Source: YouTube
Method of Communication: Public comments posted on my Shit People Say to Asexuals YouTube video
Type(s) of Fail: Mother of all tone arguments; "you're overreacting!"; asexuality fail
Result: He stopped responding
What you may need to know: My problem with this guy didn't begin in earnest until he replied to my first comment. He started this interaction by commenting on the video and saying things that sounded like they could have been innocuous OR could have been condescending, smarmy little shit comments. Considering he laughed while pointing out anime-related items in the backgrounds of the featured videos AND laid down the "But . . . but SCIENCE!" comment, I had to ask. The result wasn't pretty.
peterwXXX:
Hahahaha.... manga, Sailor Moon, Plushies... amusing.
That 'asexual' thing was educational and amusing. I see 'asexual' from a scientific stand point...doesn't have the social hangup in the animal world, unlike the human world.
[So . . . considering he laughed at my anime paraphernalia without context, kept putting "asexual" in quotes like he was humoring me, and said vague things about social hangups because HE'S A SCIENTIST . . . it was reasonable of me to ask questions, right?]
swankivy:
I'm not following the thrust of your comment. I'm glad you said you found "that 'asexual' thing" educational, but what "scientific standpoint" are you talking about seeing it from, and to what effect? And is there something particularly amusing to you about plushies, manga, and Sailor Moon (or their appearance in the video)?
peterwXXX:
1, life always amuse me, that you should not take offense to. By "amuse", I mean I grow more enlighten.
2, "for hammers, the world is a nail". For me, being into science, 'asexual' is associated with single cell organism. try to deny that one.
3, It took ages for LGBT to come the current level of 'visibility'. Non-sexual, guess what? It will take time for you, too.
4, Yes, I know of a non-sexual/asexual. She's only into making her comic, even ignoring her temp Bfriend then dumping him.
[I think the last item is my favorite. He cites experience with knowing an asexual! Who of course is someone who only focuses on her comic and dumps her boyfriend, which is incredibly relevant to this conversation! What did any of this have to do with my request for clarification?]
swankivy:
1. I didn't "take offense." I asked you what you meant, because normally people don't point out stuff in the background and then say "that's amusing" without context. I was asking for context.
2. "Asexual" is associated with non-sexual reproduction in a scientific context. It'd be absurd for anyone to think humans were trying to apply "asexual" to be understood as applied to our reproduction. In science as well as everywhere else, context matters . . . so I don't see how "well I'm into science, so asexual can't be applied any other way" makes sense here. We're clearly talking about orientation, not reproduction.
3. I don't see the relevance in you pointing out that awareness will take time for us. I'm aware of this, but this whole "well guess what?" phrasing of your suggests I'm being unreasonable somehow. Are you arguing with an argument I didn't make?
4. I didn't ask you if you knew any asexuals, so factoids about the one you know seem irrelevant. Why would you start with "yes" as if I had suggested you must not know any asexuals?
Look at my comment. I asked for clarification from you. Please avoid being vague if you want people to understand what you're talking about, though the character limit might be limiting your communication. This "the world is a nail" b.s. suggests my asking you to clarify constitutes attacking you.
peterwXXX:
Last few thoughts...
I'm sure you're not exposed to people like me. Personally, I find the world's diversity, rather enriching. This diversity does include LBGT and asexual/non-sexual.
How can I communicate my sincerity through text? I can't. We, you and I, have to deal with it...not able to convey sincerity.
If I were anti-non-heterosexual, would I not go on a rampage and use derogatory remarks? I been to enough cons (and anime cons) to know that there is a diverse community.
[Isn't that cute? He wants ally cookies. Because obviously he'd be a lot more blatantly disgusting if he was against us. No, honey. Actual "sincere" allies don't hand down condescending comments about asexuality BECAUSE SCIENCE and don't make uncalled-for comments about asexuals they know and don't have to point out how prejudiced they're not.]
swankivy:
I don't know what any of this has to do with me. I certainly hope you weren't planning on rampaging using derogatory remarks, and I don't see the purpose of rambling about your sincerity--as if I questioned it?--nor do I see your point in suggesting I must have thought you were "anti-non-heterosexual" when I asked you to clarify your comment.
peterwXXX:
Allow me to reply to the over looked question "And is there something particularly amusing to you about plushies, manga, and Sailor Moon..."
I have my AnimeCon91 badge somewhere (my first trip alone to anywhere), been to AnimeExpo92, cosplayed at both. Been to the first Katsu, Otakon, ACen, AWA, Animazement...Claims of my legit Otakuness.
So, yes. Plushies, manga and Sailor Moon do amuse me as I collect my manga and artbooks. I don't do plushies since I don't have room.
[OH LOOK AT ME LOOK AT ME I'M AN ANIME GEEK AND YOU MISUNDERSTOOD ME! You thought I laughed and called your stuff "amusing" because I was putting you down, but IT WAS THE OPPOSITE! Gee!]
swankivy:
Again, I don't need proof of what you're interested in and I wasn't questioning your integrity. I wanted to know why you essentially pointed at things I own and said "hahaha." When I asked for context by basically saying "what's so funny?" a straight answer is all I needed.
peterwXXX:
I'm trying to say... if you could free your interpretation ...is 'asexual' is something very new to my experience. Are you able to accept that line of thinking? It's... anthropological or biological or sociological. It's not a slight nor insult.
You're acting well overly defensive and you may have legitimate reason to; but, I'm not your enemy.
Again, is there anyway I can convey my sincerity to you over text? No, i'm stuck with what I got and you're stuck with misinterpreting.
[Get that? The poor guy's being misunderstood through no fault of his own--it's MY DETERMINATION TO STICK WITH MISINTERPRETING that has caused this mess. I'm sure it has nothing to do with how people frequently invoke "science" to suggest asexuality can't be a real thing and make jokes about amoebas! You know what? If he's not saying "but 'asexual' refers to reproduction in science, so you shouldn't use it," then WHAT DOES IT HAVE TO DO WITH OUR ORIENTATION? It's a non sequitur! That would be like saying "I'm tall," and having your conversation partner bark back, "Tall? But you have to understand that TALL is a size of drink you can get at Starbucks! I'm a barista--surely you understand why describing yourself as TALL makes me think of coffee!"]
swankivy:
You really don't need to keep trying to find someone to blame for why I didn't understand the first comment you made. I said your comment was vague and asked questions to understand it, but you've decided I must be defensive and "misinterpreting" because I asked for more information. I did not make an assumption about what you meant. As for "asexual's" meaning, apply it as an orientation, and the problem of "this is new to me" goes away for all subsequent interactions. All fixed!
[He didn't write back to this, but one wonders why this is supposedly so "new to him" if he already knew an asexual (who of course thinks of nothing but making comics and dumping boyfriends).]