Just a little more...
Just one more bite...just one more sip...just one more word...just one more pill.
Feel. That's all you want. To feel.
You take that bite. You know it will make you sick.
You take that sip. You know it will make you wretch.
You say those words. You know it will make them hurt.
You swallow that pill. You know it destroys those cells.
Bite. Sip. Speak. Swallow.
Another day. Another fight. Will you be able to stop yourself next time? Or will you keep on doing the self-destructive things you do?
Is the normalcy of health too much for you? Is it easier to be sick?
When you're sick at least you feel. You feel pain. You feel empathy. You feel alive because it never stops.
How do you go back to normal after that? How do you learn to feel again when you've been dying for three years?
You do the things you know will take you back to that place.
You take that bite.
You sip that drink.
You say those words.
You swallow that pill.
And it all starts again tomorrow.
Feel. That's all you want. To feel.
You take that bite. You know it will make you sick.
You take that sip. You know it will make you wretch.
You say those words. You know it will make them hurt.
You swallow that pill. You know it destroys those cells.
Bite. Sip. Speak. Swallow.
Another day. Another fight. Will you be able to stop yourself next time? Or will you keep on doing the self-destructive things you do?
Is the normalcy of health too much for you? Is it easier to be sick?
When you're sick at least you feel. You feel pain. You feel empathy. You feel alive because it never stops.
How do you go back to normal after that? How do you learn to feel again when you've been dying for three years?
You do the things you know will take you back to that place.
You take that bite.
You sip that drink.
You say those words.
You swallow that pill.
And it all starts again tomorrow.