ugh
so i havent updated in the longest time
and well thats cuz ive had nothing to say worth reading
like this entry for instance
im so sick of fuckin everything. i try so fuckin hard, i want to get straight A's, im determined, but yet it screws with my fuckin social life, not like i have one ne way. i have no friends, i sit on my ass on the weekends, watching movies with my fuckin mother. i have no boyfriend, and when i fuckin came close to having one, I SCREWED it up cuz i wanted to be a player and not be settled, and now hes with some other bitch who i hate and i have to watch them EVERY day at school, and realize i coulda had that but because i was playing miss hard to get i lost it.
and matt, i dont miss him. but i miss the idea of having a boyfriend for a year and a half and having him tell me he loves me all the time. and spending time with him, and being able to just be ME with him..and ughh now we dont even talk, after getting in another fuckin fight like a month ago.
my cell phone hasnt rung from ne one in like 4 days. o wait the neighbor called and asked if i could babysit. o and my dad and mom calls my cell :D
woww
if i had the chance to get up and leave and never come back i would.
and im sick of trying to be the perfect student and im sick of trying to be that person for my parents, they make me feel SO god damn guilty if i get a fucking B on my report card..
but ill prove it to them that i can do it and im not the stupid idiot they think i am.
fuck this
fuck everything
and everyone
p.s. im on my period so i gues im PMSing a TINY bit..
i just needed to vent thats all..
and well thats cuz ive had nothing to say worth reading
like this entry for instance
im so sick of fuckin everything. i try so fuckin hard, i want to get straight A's, im determined, but yet it screws with my fuckin social life, not like i have one ne way. i have no friends, i sit on my ass on the weekends, watching movies with my fuckin mother. i have no boyfriend, and when i fuckin came close to having one, I SCREWED it up cuz i wanted to be a player and not be settled, and now hes with some other bitch who i hate and i have to watch them EVERY day at school, and realize i coulda had that but because i was playing miss hard to get i lost it.
and matt, i dont miss him. but i miss the idea of having a boyfriend for a year and a half and having him tell me he loves me all the time. and spending time with him, and being able to just be ME with him..and ughh now we dont even talk, after getting in another fuckin fight like a month ago.
my cell phone hasnt rung from ne one in like 4 days. o wait the neighbor called and asked if i could babysit. o and my dad and mom calls my cell :D
woww
if i had the chance to get up and leave and never come back i would.
and im sick of trying to be the perfect student and im sick of trying to be that person for my parents, they make me feel SO god damn guilty if i get a fucking B on my report card..
but ill prove it to them that i can do it and im not the stupid idiot they think i am.
fuck this
fuck everything
and everyone
p.s. im on my period so i gues im PMSing a TINY bit..
i just needed to vent thats all..