fuck my job
so life is what it is right?
Why does it seem that i am still spinning in a circle.....that i thought i had ended by moving away from the badness.....although there is none of that where I am now.......I still feel lost.
I don't know who I am. I wish I did.
If someone can give me an idea as to how to find myself it would be greatly appreciated.
I hate what I do for work. I hate what I have become. Which isnt where I wanted to be at this point.
Don't get me wrong. I love my boyfriend. I love my dogs. I love my family. But I just don't think I love myself to the extent that I should.
I wish I never dropped out of college.
I feel like a waste. A waste of time, energy......
I see my friends with amazing jobs.....amazing lives. And I just wish I had stuck through it. Shown Preserverance. Not given up on my dreams. But I did because I was lazy. Like an asshole. Only works when its needed.
I don't put forth any effort now to do anything. And I never have. Why?
Because it always came so easily to me. I am smart. I have brains. I just choose not to use them in the capacity I should. I should be a journalist now. I should be doing what I love. But I have fallen into this hole of waitressing. Where it seems to wear you down to the point that you think that there is nothing better in life than where you are at now.
I don't want to do this forever. I need to get out. I need to do my real calling. I need to be the new Lester Bangs. That is what I am here for.
Save me from my nightmare job.
Why does it seem that i am still spinning in a circle.....that i thought i had ended by moving away from the badness.....although there is none of that where I am now.......I still feel lost.
I don't know who I am. I wish I did.
If someone can give me an idea as to how to find myself it would be greatly appreciated.
I hate what I do for work. I hate what I have become. Which isnt where I wanted to be at this point.
Don't get me wrong. I love my boyfriend. I love my dogs. I love my family. But I just don't think I love myself to the extent that I should.
I wish I never dropped out of college.
I feel like a waste. A waste of time, energy......
I see my friends with amazing jobs.....amazing lives. And I just wish I had stuck through it. Shown Preserverance. Not given up on my dreams. But I did because I was lazy. Like an asshole. Only works when its needed.
I don't put forth any effort now to do anything. And I never have. Why?
Because it always came so easily to me. I am smart. I have brains. I just choose not to use them in the capacity I should. I should be a journalist now. I should be doing what I love. But I have fallen into this hole of waitressing. Where it seems to wear you down to the point that you think that there is nothing better in life than where you are at now.
I don't want to do this forever. I need to get out. I need to do my real calling. I need to be the new Lester Bangs. That is what I am here for.
Save me from my nightmare job.