Letter To My Boys ♥
♥ Letter To My Boys ♥
I'm writing this now since I might not have the strength to when the final decision comes out.
It will soon be all over, whether it's for the better or the worse... The past few months have been such a series of ups and downs that I don't know what to expect, so it's really going to be a surprise, regardless of what happens to you guys. Will you become one again, or will you go your separate ways? I'm not exactly sure I want to know the answer, but at the same time, I've grown tired of watching you suffer and knowing that despite our selfish desire that you step on the scene again as a group, despite the fact that us fans are hurting right now, you are the ones who have been through the worse.
My heart wants you five to always stay together and I know that this is also what you wish would happen, ideally. I might not have the right to speak in your behalf, but I know how strong the bond that ties you was and still is. I could feel your love when I first got to know you... I still do, to be honest. The relationship that ties you together, that incredible love that has bound you ever since you started walking on the path to success isn't something that you could have faked, nor is it something that can go away with time or hardship. No one can convince me otherwise. You five are not just band mates or friends, but blood brothers. What you have is rare, so very rare, and I know that very few people experience it in their lives.
It's cruel that you would have to stop seeing each other just because you have differing opinions. Somehow, this feels like a mother grounding her children because of some mischievous prank... But you're no kids; you're grown men who should know better than anyone what's good for them. For that reason, I will support whatever action you decide to take, just as long as deep down inside, you feel that it's the best one you could have chosen. If you consider that no compromise can be made and decide to break it off, however painful it might be to accept a disbandment, I will. D-I-S-B-A-N-D-M-E-N-T... Such a scary word, isn't it? I never thought I'd live to see the day where those two words would appear in the same sentence... Still, now the chances are pretty high, even though a thin thread of hope lingers in me.
We Cassieopeia don't know the very bottom of the story... The raw truth, void of the media's influence and SM Entertainment's lies. We can't understand why Jaejoong, Yoochun and Junsu decided that they had had enough, that their body had reached its limit, that they couldn't live with a slave contract hanging above their heads... But we also do not know why Yunho and Changmin didn't take part of the lawsuit. Perhaps they really do believe their conditions are just, or perhaps they felt too indebted to the company to pull such a move on them...
To be honest, that wouldn't surprise me at all, seeing how used they are to making sacrifices.
Oh, don't think that I've given up on you... The only prospect that you might separate sounds so unreal to me that I'm hoping it would all be a big joke. You know, it's the kind of thing that sounds almost mathematically impossible... The kind of thing that makes you go: "Pssh! As if there was a slim chance of that happening!" And I still believe that... I'm still holding onto you guys like a child grips his mother's hand the first time she dumps him in kindergarten. I want to cry out for you not to go away, to just stay, dammit, stay. If I didn't care for you guys, I would tell you to forget about this and continue making music... But I do care.
For that reason, please don't consider us when you will take your decision. Forget the red ocean and think about yourselves, for once in your life. Remember that in the end, underneath the fame and the make-up, when the lights are off and the cameras stop recording, you're just like us: human beings. You have a right to happiness. If I would hate to see you disband, there's nothing I would want less than for you to be in pain. Therefore... Choose whatever you feel will make you happy. Don't worry: there will be millions of us to help each other up when the verdict comes out.
Cassiopeia is strong. We will make it through this hard patch.
Thank you for working so hard all these years... Not only have you entertained us, but you've been an incredible inspiration of perseverance and humility. This might not seem much to you, but it seriously means the world to us. Through your laughter and your tears, we've seen that there's no such thing as impossibility, that there's not a thing one can't achieve once they set their hearts to it. Thank you for always being so sincere, so real, so you. If you just knew how much you've changed each and every one of us for the better... I'm sure I wouldn't be exaggerating if I ventured to say that you've saved many lives by just being yourselves. And that, boys, is not something just anyone can brag about. Thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you. I don't think I can say it enough.
Rest assured, I will never forget you and I won't ever bear a grudge towards either of you. To me, Jaejoong will always be the kind, caring mother that can light up the world with his smile. Yunho will live on as the best leader of all and an almost too kind father who always places himself last. Yoochun will stay the sensitive and pure doll face that I've grown to love so much. Junsu will remain the cute dolphin with unsuspected charisma, and his "Eu-kyang-kyang" laugh won't cease to resound in my heart. Lastly, I won't forget Changmin's clever remarks, surprising maturity and excessive obsession for food (and videos). Ah, so many memories are coming back to me... Feels like it was yesterday that I first heard of you.
I love you, boys. I love you all equally and won't ever stop, do you hear me? Is this so hard to understand? Do I need a reason? I don't think so... And even if some people are going to wave this off as nothing important, they just don't know. They have no idea what they're missing. They can't understand that you guys are everything but ordinary.
Know that I'll never regret letting you in my heart... and that you'll always stay there, no matter what. That's a promise I'm not about to break.
It's the least I can do for you, after all you've done for me.
Thank you. ♥♥♥♥♥