(no subject)

[susuyu]

i just read heath's msn name (i hope you're reading this) 'call me jonah.' well let me tell you, pumpkin...i've felt all week like jonah (the biblical one...before he turned brave). this kind of feeling makes it hard to sleep at night. the thing is, i sort of think i know what i'm supposed to do but i'm just too damn scared. scared of leaving everything that is dear to me. opportunities i'm not ready to forego. luxuries i've come to need.
"a man can have anything he wants if..."

i need so much prayer
and time that i don't have

so that's all