Apr 12, 2009 21:30
I'll post more on Anime Punch later but right now I have been upset since I left the con for various reaosns. If you don't want to read a whiny post, head somewhere else.
Anyway, my reason I want to post is because I feel like I can't seem to get my feelings out to anyone and I'm starting to feel left out at cons and IRL. Many of you already know of my condition which I have a hard time communicationg People at Anime Punch kept asking why I don't talk so much as compared to online. Simple- I'm too afraid too and I suck at conversations.. My friend also said I needed to be outgoing some but I can't. I'm afraid to go outgoing because then I'm afraid I'll turn into a loudmouth drunk like some peole I know. No matter how hard I try, (plus, I don't know what really outgoing means) I can't start up a conversation and make friends IRL. At Anime Punch, people seemed to talk to me more than at A and G. I don't know why but it happended. I just wish I could talk to people and keep friends but I can't because I'm so shy.
What also troubles me is that everyone else has a lover except me. Everytime I try to start a relationship with a they just end up being retarted,selfishmean,gay,bodytype, or alredy taken.
Example-
There is this guy I have talken to at a couple of conventions but not matter what I can't seem to respond to him first. I get nervous when I see this person and I just can't talk to him and his friends. And I probably won't see him and his friends again til who knows. My friends want me to choose I guy I like no matter what they look. But I want a guy that looks nice and is smart, not someone who looks awful in every shape and form with other bad habits. And I'm afraid to talk to people. I feel like I'll never have any friends except ones online. Online friends are okay too but I wish I had some to go to nearby for advice.
Does anyone know what to do?
Too tired now, going to bed.
advice anime punch lonely