NEW FIC NEW FIC!
Author: paiger1218
Title: Goodbye My Lover
Rating: PG-ish
Timeline: Before Matthew is born, but after we meet Ethan. Inara’s about 3 months along if that helps.
Characters: Zoë/Ethan Centric, Appearances by Mal, Inara, Alley, River, Jayne and Wash. Yeah, you heard me. Wash.
Author’s Note: 1) Took me frakkin’ long enough! Grad School is scary. 2) Bring your tissues! 3) There’s more to come on this relationship, please be warned. I would like to call “dibs” on Zoë and Ethan’s kids, but if someone writes them before me, I’ll live. Still, am working on a fic with them in it. Oh, and this is un-beta'd cause I was too darn impatient, so just bear with me! SO GLAD TO BE BACK WRITING HERE! P.S. The song is by James Blunt.
Caveats and Addendums: They ain't mine. Just playing with the action figures a bit. Joss is Boss.
In the years since they’d lived on Avery, Zoë had struck up an unlikely friendship with the minister, Ethan Morrell. As time went on, it became apparent that their friendship was moving in another direction. They’d often take long walks together at night, talking and taking in everything around them. One particular night, however, things took quite a turn.
Ethan was walking Zoë back to Serenity when it hit her like a ton of bricks. She had moved on. She had feelings for another man, and it meant she had moved on. That Wash was really gone. Ethan stopped when he saw the look on her face.
“Zoë?” he asked, cautiously.
She turned to face him, two solitary tears rolling down her face. Realization dawned on her and she wiped them away, looking down at the ground, away from Ethan.
They’d been taking these evening strolls more often lately, but it was the first night Zoë knew she had feelings for someone other than Wash and it went off like a bomb in her heart.
“Zoë?” Ethan asked again.
This time, Zoë looked up at him, fear in her eyes. She turned around to Serenity, and fled inside.
Ethan stood there for a few moments, wondering what had gone wrong, before Jayne came flying out and grabbed Ethan by his collar.
“What’d ya do to her? What’d ya DO? I swear it by my Vera, you tell me now or God help ya!” Jayne yelled, shaking the minister.
“Wha-what? I didn’t DO anything to her, honest! We were just walking back, and she started crying. Honestly Jayne, I don’t know what’s going on, but Zoë’s troubled…” Ethan said.
Jayne put him down, looking him in the eye. His shoulders slumped ever so slightly and he looked down at the ground then back up at Ethan.
“You’d better be tellin’ the truth or it’s yer grave,” Jayne said, walking back to Serenity.
Ethan let out a sigh of relief before staring at Serenity. He had wondered what it was about Zoë. After all, she seemed to like him all right and he certainly had feelings for her. But there was something there that was holding Zoë back and whatever it was, it was painful. Not knowing what else to do, Ethan slowly turned and walked back to his home, every now and then looking back at the great ship, waiting to see if Zoë might come out and explain what the heck was going on.
--------
It was River who woke Inara out of a deep sleep, shaking her roughly. Mal was up and out of bed in an instant.
“What the! Albatross, what’re you doin?” Mal asked indignantly.
Inara woke then and looked at River and then at Mal sleepily.
“What is it River?” Inara asked, sitting up in bed and pulling the covers over her naked self.
She eyed Mal and realized River was staring at him because he was naked.
“Um, Mal. You may want to come back to bed now,” Inara said gently.
Mal, suddenly realizing he was just as naked as Inara, scrambled back into the bed.
River rolled her eyes and sat down on the edge of the bed near Inara.
“She’s hurting,” River said resignedly.
Mal’s eyes bulged as Inara took hold of River’s hand.
“Who is, honey?” Inara said, a hand unconsciously going to the bump of her belly that held hers and Mal’s second child. She wanted to run and check on Alley, before River spoke again.
“Zoë,” River said, looking away.
Inara stilled Mal, who was about to get out of bed again.
“She’s unsure. Knows he’s gone, knows he’s not coming back. But she’s afraid to move on. Feels love from someone else, doesn’t know if she can ever love again. Feels it isn’t right,” River said, tears rolling down her face.
Wordlessly, Inara stood and draped her robe around her.
“Stay here, River,” Inara said, not wanting River’s abilities to interfere with helping Zoë.
Mal looked up, a distinct ‘what about me?’ look in his eyes. Inara knew he’d want to help, but she simply shook her head, and Mal nodded back in agreement.
"Give Alley a kiss for me," Inara said, leaving the home.
----------
Zoë was still sobbing loudly when Inara came knocking at her door.
“Zoë? It’s Inara… can I come in?” Zoë heard Inara’s voice and stubbornly wiped her eyes.
She slowly walked to the door and unlocked the hatch, not looking at Inara as she went back to her bed and lay down.
Inara knew this was neither the time nor the place for words, instead following Zoë and sitting down next to her, pulling the woman into her arms.
Zoë didn’t resist, and promptly continued to cry freely as Inara slowly rocked her in her arms.
“Shhh, it’s okay, just let it all out,” Inara whispered.
For a long time, all that could be heard was Zoë’s sobs before things got quiet. Inara didn’t dare speak, and Zoë just stared off for a while. Inara had never envisioned Zoë in this state; Zoë had always been one of the strongest women Inara had ever known. To see her like this was painful.
Finally, Zoë looked at Inara, wiping the tears from her eyes and falling back into her stoic self, if only for a moment.
“I miss him,” Zoë said simply, her eyes filling again, but Zoë bit the tears back.
“Oh Zoë, we all do. And you know, it’s okay to miss him,” Inara replied softly.
“It ain’t just that. I’ve moved on,” Zoë said, looking at Inara with fear in her eyes.
“With the minister?” Inara asked.
“How did you…?” Zoë asked.
“I saw it coming, know you’ve been spending more time with him,” Inara replied.
Zoë said nothing, only nodded.
“You could have a future with him, Zoë. And Wash would want you to be happy,” Inara said gently, choosing her words carefully.
“I know, I just, I don’t know if I can let him go,” Zoë replied.
“Don’t know until you try,” Inara said, getting up and walking with Zoë back to the cottage.
-------
Mal was pacing worriedly; Alley curled up in his arms; as River watched Sushi and Sashimi when Inara walked in with Zoë.
Mal was quiet at first, unsure of what to say or do. He did, however, take in Zoë’s appearance and his heart fell at the disheveled sight of her.
River took the opportunity to leave then, placing a loving hand on Zoë’s shoulder as she walked out.
Zoë sat outside of Mal and Inara’s room, waiting as they spoke.
“She gonna be alright?” Mal asked softly.
“She will be. For now, there’s something we have to do, and you’re going to have to understand why it’s only me and Zoë going. I’ll explain more when I get back,” Inara said, packing up an overnight bag.
Mal stumbled, wanting to know more, before Inara quieted him with a kiss.
“I love you. It will be okay. And try not to give in to Alley too much,” Inara reassured him with a wry grin as she gave Alley a kiss and turned to leave.
“Yeah, but where are you goin’?” Mal asked, frustrated at his not knowing what was going on.
“To see Wash,” Inara replied grimly as she shut the door behind her.
Mal sat down on the edge of the bed then, arms wrapped tightly around his daughter. His heart heavy, Mal watched Sushi and Sashimi swim around in a frenzy as if they themselves knew what was going on.
----------
It was still nightfall when Inara and Zoë reached Wash’s grave though morning was on its way.
Inara remained standing on the edge of Serenity’s ramp, watching Zoë slowly make her way to Wash’s grave.
Zoë felt strange and lifeless as she always did when it came to the subject of Wash. But standing in front of his grave, she felt as if she were in a bad dream. Sometimes, she would dream of Wash. Sometimes he would reach out his hand to hers and she would reach for it desperately, only Wash was always slipping out of her reach, far away. Other times, she’d be back on Mr. Universe’s home world, and she could see the spear headed for her husband. She’d ignore Mal and run in front of Wash, but it would always be too late.
She could hear his voice now.
I’m right behind ya, baby.
The tears came and Zoë shivered, falling to her knees in front of Wash’s grave.
“I’m so sorry, baby,” she muttered, crying in heaving sobs.
Zoë looked up at the sky, watching the stars, and let out a howling cry. When she could cry no more, Zoë watched the image of Wash and started to sing, softly.
It was an old Earth-that-was song that Zoë had heard shortly after Wash’s death.
Did I disappoint you or let you down?
Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?
'Cause I saw the end before we'd begun,
Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won.
So I took what's mine by eternal right.
Took your soul out into the night.
It may be over but it won't stop there,
I am here for you if you'd only care.
You touched my heart you touched my soul.
You changed my life and all my goals.
And love is blind and that I knew when,
My heart was blinded by you.
I've kissed your lips and held your head.
Shared your dreams and shared your bed.
I know you well, I know your smell.
I've been addicted to you.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me
I am a dreamer and when I wake,
You can't break my spirit - it's my dreams you take.
And as you move on, remember me,
Remember us and all we used to be
I've seen you cry, I've seen you smile.
I've watched you sleeping for a while.
I'd be the father of your child.
I'd spend a lifetime with you.
I know your fears and you know mine.
We've had our doubts but now we're fine,
And I love you, I swear that's true.
I cannot live without you.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.
And I still hold your hand in mine.
In mine when I'm asleep.
And I will bear my soul in time,
When I'm kneeling at your feet.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.
I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow.
I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow.
I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow.
I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow.
“Goodbye, baby,” Zoë said, placing a kiss on Wash’s headstone, turning and walking back to Serenity. As she did, she untied the leather necklace from her neck and gingerly held it in her hand.
Inara wiped her eyes clean, pulling Zoë into an embrace.
“Let’s go home,” Zoë said quietly, tears still falling from her eyes.
Inara walked back into the ship, as Zoë turned to take one last look at her husband’s grave.
“You’ll always be my first, baby. I’ll never forget you and what we had,” Zoë whispered, blowing a kiss to Wash’s grave before turning and walking into Serenity as the ramp began to close behind her.
----------
Serenity touched down on Avery mid-day, and Inara met Mal at their home, filling him in as best as she could. Alley came running up and immediately jumped into her mother's arms.
As always when Wash was mentioned, Mal’s heart felt like it was bleeding, pulling Inara to him and resting his head in the crook of her neck. He’d still not divulged all of his feelings about the events of Miranda to Inara, but she knew it was a wound that would haunt him his whole life.
---------
Zoë found Ethan sitting outside of the church, drinking tea.
“Ethan,” Zoë said quietly.
He immediately stood, spilling his tea in the process.
“Sneaked up on me,” Ethan said, putting the cup down as he let out a nervous laugh.
Zoë took his hand in hers, pulling him to her and giving him a kiss.
Ethan looked at her afterwards, unsure of what to do next.
“Well, uh, well,” Ethan said, scratching his head.
“Come with me to Serenity,” Zoë said. It wasn’t a question.
They walked holding hands in silence as Zoë lead Ethan to the bridge of Serenity and sat down with him next to where Wash used to pilot the ship.
“Ethan, there’s something you gotta know,” Zoë started, looking away from Ethan towards the window she had repaired.
Ethan nodded as Zoë looked at him.
“Before we came here, we were flying all the time. We had a great pilot - Wash. Could make you laugh no matter what and remained cool no matter what we had comin’ at us,” Zoë started, never breaking eye contact with Ethan.
“Wash and I, we eventually fell in love and got married. Were even gonna have a family. Until Miranda,” Zoë could feel the pit in her stomach start to form.
“Miranda. We heard about that here… that was you?” Ethan asked, taking her hands in his.
Zoë nodded, looking towards the window again.
“Wash didn’t make it,” she said softly, and the tears fell again.
“Zoë, I’m so sorry,” Ethan said, taking her in his arms.
“That’s why I needed time. You see, I think there’s somethin’ goin’ on with you and me, and I needed to make sure I could go on with this… had to let him go,” Zoë said softly, sniffling quietly.
“I understand. After my wife died…well, didn’t let anyone in until I met you,” Ethan said, meeting Zoë’s eyes again.
“Ain’t gonna be easy, bein’ with me,” Zoë said.
“Nor with me,” Ethan replied.
“But I once told Wash, I wasn’t afraid of losing something that I wasn’t gonna try to have it,” Zoë said, pulling Ethan in for another kiss.
“Good words to live by,” Ethan replied.
“So, what now?” he asked after a moment’s silence.
“Take it day by day,” Zoë said, allowing herself to smile at Ethan.
“I can do that,” Ethan replied, holding Zoë close to him as they watched the sun begin to set through Serenity’s windows.
Title: Goodbye My Lover
Rating: PG-ish
Timeline: Before Matthew is born, but after we meet Ethan. Inara’s about 3 months along if that helps.
Characters: Zoë/Ethan Centric, Appearances by Mal, Inara, Alley, River, Jayne and Wash. Yeah, you heard me. Wash.
Author’s Note: 1) Took me frakkin’ long enough! Grad School is scary. 2) Bring your tissues! 3) There’s more to come on this relationship, please be warned. I would like to call “dibs” on Zoë and Ethan’s kids, but if someone writes them before me, I’ll live. Still, am working on a fic with them in it. Oh, and this is un-beta'd cause I was too darn impatient, so just bear with me! SO GLAD TO BE BACK WRITING HERE! P.S. The song is by James Blunt.
Caveats and Addendums: They ain't mine. Just playing with the action figures a bit. Joss is Boss.
In the years since they’d lived on Avery, Zoë had struck up an unlikely friendship with the minister, Ethan Morrell. As time went on, it became apparent that their friendship was moving in another direction. They’d often take long walks together at night, talking and taking in everything around them. One particular night, however, things took quite a turn.
Ethan was walking Zoë back to Serenity when it hit her like a ton of bricks. She had moved on. She had feelings for another man, and it meant she had moved on. That Wash was really gone. Ethan stopped when he saw the look on her face.
“Zoë?” he asked, cautiously.
She turned to face him, two solitary tears rolling down her face. Realization dawned on her and she wiped them away, looking down at the ground, away from Ethan.
They’d been taking these evening strolls more often lately, but it was the first night Zoë knew she had feelings for someone other than Wash and it went off like a bomb in her heart.
“Zoë?” Ethan asked again.
This time, Zoë looked up at him, fear in her eyes. She turned around to Serenity, and fled inside.
Ethan stood there for a few moments, wondering what had gone wrong, before Jayne came flying out and grabbed Ethan by his collar.
“What’d ya do to her? What’d ya DO? I swear it by my Vera, you tell me now or God help ya!” Jayne yelled, shaking the minister.
“Wha-what? I didn’t DO anything to her, honest! We were just walking back, and she started crying. Honestly Jayne, I don’t know what’s going on, but Zoë’s troubled…” Ethan said.
Jayne put him down, looking him in the eye. His shoulders slumped ever so slightly and he looked down at the ground then back up at Ethan.
“You’d better be tellin’ the truth or it’s yer grave,” Jayne said, walking back to Serenity.
Ethan let out a sigh of relief before staring at Serenity. He had wondered what it was about Zoë. After all, she seemed to like him all right and he certainly had feelings for her. But there was something there that was holding Zoë back and whatever it was, it was painful. Not knowing what else to do, Ethan slowly turned and walked back to his home, every now and then looking back at the great ship, waiting to see if Zoë might come out and explain what the heck was going on.
--------
It was River who woke Inara out of a deep sleep, shaking her roughly. Mal was up and out of bed in an instant.
“What the! Albatross, what’re you doin?” Mal asked indignantly.
Inara woke then and looked at River and then at Mal sleepily.
“What is it River?” Inara asked, sitting up in bed and pulling the covers over her naked self.
She eyed Mal and realized River was staring at him because he was naked.
“Um, Mal. You may want to come back to bed now,” Inara said gently.
Mal, suddenly realizing he was just as naked as Inara, scrambled back into the bed.
River rolled her eyes and sat down on the edge of the bed near Inara.
“She’s hurting,” River said resignedly.
Mal’s eyes bulged as Inara took hold of River’s hand.
“Who is, honey?” Inara said, a hand unconsciously going to the bump of her belly that held hers and Mal’s second child. She wanted to run and check on Alley, before River spoke again.
“Zoë,” River said, looking away.
Inara stilled Mal, who was about to get out of bed again.
“She’s unsure. Knows he’s gone, knows he’s not coming back. But she’s afraid to move on. Feels love from someone else, doesn’t know if she can ever love again. Feels it isn’t right,” River said, tears rolling down her face.
Wordlessly, Inara stood and draped her robe around her.
“Stay here, River,” Inara said, not wanting River’s abilities to interfere with helping Zoë.
Mal looked up, a distinct ‘what about me?’ look in his eyes. Inara knew he’d want to help, but she simply shook her head, and Mal nodded back in agreement.
"Give Alley a kiss for me," Inara said, leaving the home.
----------
Zoë was still sobbing loudly when Inara came knocking at her door.
“Zoë? It’s Inara… can I come in?” Zoë heard Inara’s voice and stubbornly wiped her eyes.
She slowly walked to the door and unlocked the hatch, not looking at Inara as she went back to her bed and lay down.
Inara knew this was neither the time nor the place for words, instead following Zoë and sitting down next to her, pulling the woman into her arms.
Zoë didn’t resist, and promptly continued to cry freely as Inara slowly rocked her in her arms.
“Shhh, it’s okay, just let it all out,” Inara whispered.
For a long time, all that could be heard was Zoë’s sobs before things got quiet. Inara didn’t dare speak, and Zoë just stared off for a while. Inara had never envisioned Zoë in this state; Zoë had always been one of the strongest women Inara had ever known. To see her like this was painful.
Finally, Zoë looked at Inara, wiping the tears from her eyes and falling back into her stoic self, if only for a moment.
“I miss him,” Zoë said simply, her eyes filling again, but Zoë bit the tears back.
“Oh Zoë, we all do. And you know, it’s okay to miss him,” Inara replied softly.
“It ain’t just that. I’ve moved on,” Zoë said, looking at Inara with fear in her eyes.
“With the minister?” Inara asked.
“How did you…?” Zoë asked.
“I saw it coming, know you’ve been spending more time with him,” Inara replied.
Zoë said nothing, only nodded.
“You could have a future with him, Zoë. And Wash would want you to be happy,” Inara said gently, choosing her words carefully.
“I know, I just, I don’t know if I can let him go,” Zoë replied.
“Don’t know until you try,” Inara said, getting up and walking with Zoë back to the cottage.
-------
Mal was pacing worriedly; Alley curled up in his arms; as River watched Sushi and Sashimi when Inara walked in with Zoë.
Mal was quiet at first, unsure of what to say or do. He did, however, take in Zoë’s appearance and his heart fell at the disheveled sight of her.
River took the opportunity to leave then, placing a loving hand on Zoë’s shoulder as she walked out.
Zoë sat outside of Mal and Inara’s room, waiting as they spoke.
“She gonna be alright?” Mal asked softly.
“She will be. For now, there’s something we have to do, and you’re going to have to understand why it’s only me and Zoë going. I’ll explain more when I get back,” Inara said, packing up an overnight bag.
Mal stumbled, wanting to know more, before Inara quieted him with a kiss.
“I love you. It will be okay. And try not to give in to Alley too much,” Inara reassured him with a wry grin as she gave Alley a kiss and turned to leave.
“Yeah, but where are you goin’?” Mal asked, frustrated at his not knowing what was going on.
“To see Wash,” Inara replied grimly as she shut the door behind her.
Mal sat down on the edge of the bed then, arms wrapped tightly around his daughter. His heart heavy, Mal watched Sushi and Sashimi swim around in a frenzy as if they themselves knew what was going on.
----------
It was still nightfall when Inara and Zoë reached Wash’s grave though morning was on its way.
Inara remained standing on the edge of Serenity’s ramp, watching Zoë slowly make her way to Wash’s grave.
Zoë felt strange and lifeless as she always did when it came to the subject of Wash. But standing in front of his grave, she felt as if she were in a bad dream. Sometimes, she would dream of Wash. Sometimes he would reach out his hand to hers and she would reach for it desperately, only Wash was always slipping out of her reach, far away. Other times, she’d be back on Mr. Universe’s home world, and she could see the spear headed for her husband. She’d ignore Mal and run in front of Wash, but it would always be too late.
She could hear his voice now.
I’m right behind ya, baby.
The tears came and Zoë shivered, falling to her knees in front of Wash’s grave.
“I’m so sorry, baby,” she muttered, crying in heaving sobs.
Zoë looked up at the sky, watching the stars, and let out a howling cry. When she could cry no more, Zoë watched the image of Wash and started to sing, softly.
It was an old Earth-that-was song that Zoë had heard shortly after Wash’s death.
Did I disappoint you or let you down?
Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?
'Cause I saw the end before we'd begun,
Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won.
So I took what's mine by eternal right.
Took your soul out into the night.
It may be over but it won't stop there,
I am here for you if you'd only care.
You touched my heart you touched my soul.
You changed my life and all my goals.
And love is blind and that I knew when,
My heart was blinded by you.
I've kissed your lips and held your head.
Shared your dreams and shared your bed.
I know you well, I know your smell.
I've been addicted to you.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me
I am a dreamer and when I wake,
You can't break my spirit - it's my dreams you take.
And as you move on, remember me,
Remember us and all we used to be
I've seen you cry, I've seen you smile.
I've watched you sleeping for a while.
I'd be the father of your child.
I'd spend a lifetime with you.
I know your fears and you know mine.
We've had our doubts but now we're fine,
And I love you, I swear that's true.
I cannot live without you.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.
And I still hold your hand in mine.
In mine when I'm asleep.
And I will bear my soul in time,
When I'm kneeling at your feet.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.
I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow.
I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow.
I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow.
I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow.
“Goodbye, baby,” Zoë said, placing a kiss on Wash’s headstone, turning and walking back to Serenity. As she did, she untied the leather necklace from her neck and gingerly held it in her hand.
Inara wiped her eyes clean, pulling Zoë into an embrace.
“Let’s go home,” Zoë said quietly, tears still falling from her eyes.
Inara walked back into the ship, as Zoë turned to take one last look at her husband’s grave.
“You’ll always be my first, baby. I’ll never forget you and what we had,” Zoë whispered, blowing a kiss to Wash’s grave before turning and walking into Serenity as the ramp began to close behind her.
----------
Serenity touched down on Avery mid-day, and Inara met Mal at their home, filling him in as best as she could. Alley came running up and immediately jumped into her mother's arms.
As always when Wash was mentioned, Mal’s heart felt like it was bleeding, pulling Inara to him and resting his head in the crook of her neck. He’d still not divulged all of his feelings about the events of Miranda to Inara, but she knew it was a wound that would haunt him his whole life.
---------
Zoë found Ethan sitting outside of the church, drinking tea.
“Ethan,” Zoë said quietly.
He immediately stood, spilling his tea in the process.
“Sneaked up on me,” Ethan said, putting the cup down as he let out a nervous laugh.
Zoë took his hand in hers, pulling him to her and giving him a kiss.
Ethan looked at her afterwards, unsure of what to do next.
“Well, uh, well,” Ethan said, scratching his head.
“Come with me to Serenity,” Zoë said. It wasn’t a question.
They walked holding hands in silence as Zoë lead Ethan to the bridge of Serenity and sat down with him next to where Wash used to pilot the ship.
“Ethan, there’s something you gotta know,” Zoë started, looking away from Ethan towards the window she had repaired.
Ethan nodded as Zoë looked at him.
“Before we came here, we were flying all the time. We had a great pilot - Wash. Could make you laugh no matter what and remained cool no matter what we had comin’ at us,” Zoë started, never breaking eye contact with Ethan.
“Wash and I, we eventually fell in love and got married. Were even gonna have a family. Until Miranda,” Zoë could feel the pit in her stomach start to form.
“Miranda. We heard about that here… that was you?” Ethan asked, taking her hands in his.
Zoë nodded, looking towards the window again.
“Wash didn’t make it,” she said softly, and the tears fell again.
“Zoë, I’m so sorry,” Ethan said, taking her in his arms.
“That’s why I needed time. You see, I think there’s somethin’ goin’ on with you and me, and I needed to make sure I could go on with this… had to let him go,” Zoë said softly, sniffling quietly.
“I understand. After my wife died…well, didn’t let anyone in until I met you,” Ethan said, meeting Zoë’s eyes again.
“Ain’t gonna be easy, bein’ with me,” Zoë said.
“Nor with me,” Ethan replied.
“But I once told Wash, I wasn’t afraid of losing something that I wasn’t gonna try to have it,” Zoë said, pulling Ethan in for another kiss.
“Good words to live by,” Ethan replied.
“So, what now?” he asked after a moment’s silence.
“Take it day by day,” Zoë said, allowing herself to smile at Ethan.
“I can do that,” Ethan replied, holding Zoë close to him as they watched the sun begin to set through Serenity’s windows.