Moving Right Along...
So I've now been unfriended. I didn't do anything myself to really deserve it which makes it all the more strange yet hurtful. It was someone else who's big mouth and bad manners began this ending and I wish I could go back and hang up the phone or do something, anything different. In some ways a burden is lifted and in others the burden is quite
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Yes, it's so true that real friends are there for you (and I know who they are), and also that people are not worth the effort of keeping in your life if they choose to dismiss you over something seemingly small.
As far as slander/vindictiveness, it's part my feelings and part observation of how people relate to others when they feel they've been wronged. I have a few youngins on my friend list on fb. It amazes me how much of their personal life they post, nasty breakups followed by oops, sorry I posted that. A pregnant teen openly calling out the babies father. Ugh. Kids say the darndest things. And my own spawn speak frequently of the friending/unfriending/spiteful message thing. It's quite childish all around, but runs amok, even amongst adults. And while much of the time it may seem justified by the disher-outer, I don't know if I believe it is actually earned by anyone.
Vindictiveness is something we are all capable of. Some may have been really good at it at a point in life and try really hard not to be that person anymore, and some people never out grow the need to get someone back. Confucius says: Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves. Unfortunately, many times it doesn't only affect the two parties, but other innocent friends, especially mutual ones put in the awful position of choosing sides. I'm not expecting anyone to choose me over them in my case. Life goes on and while I may have lost a friend, no one else has. I don't want anyone else to step in and try to fix the problem or the other person (I don't think anyone could) and I hope that what's done is done and over.
Already feeling helpless, combined with knowing how people can react in certain situations easily brings a dreading of being hurt even more to the surface. I haven't dealt with a broken friendship in this manner in over 15 years. Deep wounds take time to heal, and while logic is great when it comes to the brain portion of working through these things, it doesn't always help the heart.....Time will do it's job of making things well in the world again.
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