Stepladders, spiders and the perils of the yuppie flat.
Today is a dark day. Not least because the lights in my hallway are out. Since my hallway has no windows and the bulbs appear to have died I might actually need a to change them. This brings me to the peril of the yuppie flat. The lights are LED recessed lights. I am not quite sure what size bulbs I need and since the ceilings in here are very high, I am going to need a stepladder. The problem is that due to social commitments and my working hours I am not going to be able to sort this out for quite some time. :( So I guess I'll be bumping into things. The yuppie flat is perilous. Especially if you can't drive and/or get to B&Q or the like in order to sort this out.
And on the subject of spiders, I was asked about the categorisation of the said beasties. I thought everyone knew how they were arranged*
Category 1 spider - This will take a glass and an envelope to shift.
Category 2 spider - This is slightly larger. A little more vicious. A bucket and cushion to beat it into submission with are needed to get rid of it.. (Past this point the spider is deemed to be able to defend itself)
Category 3 spider - You come home to find this spider sat in your bathtub with its limbs hanging over the side. A whip, a chair and a wheelie bin are required in this case.
Category 4 spider - Shelob. Obviously Sting and the light of Galadriel (Or the like) are needed. There is no longer any need to dispose of it, as the Mordor county council will take it away.
Category 5 spider - Ungoliant, the Terrokantula etc. It will eat you.
*If caught by surprise I have been known to react to a category 1 like a category 5. You want to know why I'm acting like a girl about this? Its because I *am* a girl!
And on the subject of spiders, I was asked about the categorisation of the said beasties. I thought everyone knew how they were arranged*
Category 1 spider - This will take a glass and an envelope to shift.
Category 2 spider - This is slightly larger. A little more vicious. A bucket and cushion to beat it into submission with are needed to get rid of it.. (Past this point the spider is deemed to be able to defend itself)
Category 3 spider - You come home to find this spider sat in your bathtub with its limbs hanging over the side. A whip, a chair and a wheelie bin are required in this case.
Category 4 spider - Shelob. Obviously Sting and the light of Galadriel (Or the like) are needed. There is no longer any need to dispose of it, as the Mordor county council will take it away.
Category 5 spider - Ungoliant, the Terrokantula etc. It will eat you.
*If caught by surprise I have been known to react to a category 1 like a category 5. You want to know why I'm acting like a girl about this? Its because I *am* a girl!